I was so tired this morning that I didn’t put my underwear on right. I only discovered it when I went to the bathroom at work. I had the frontsies in the back and the backsies in the front. Now that’s tired!

Another lunch break update from work. I know tonight I will be tired and I will rather be playing with my Amiga emulator than updating. Although I’m still a little disappointed that an emulator has nothing to do with emus.

At least my back is almost back to normal. My mood is swinging though. Oddly. On Saturday I was happy, probably because of the playground job. On Sunday my back was aching so much that I didn’t pay attention to my emotional state. On Monday I was desperately depressed and feeling blue. I went for a short trip to the playground and it did help, but only for a while. When I got back I kicked my brother off the computer to go online. Five minutes later I asked him if he wanted the computer back, I couldn’t even manage to sit there. I just had to go to bed. Generally the new meds have helped, I’m not feeling awful all the time. But I still get some nasty dips where I have bad thoughts about ways to die and where I sleep so much that I only get more tired. Most of all I would like some peace. But who am I to ask for peace when the world is at war?

The playground job went well. I talked to Kurt yesterday. He said that Jannie had told him that there wasn’t enough water for the rabbits. I shall have to ask her if she meant the rabbits in the goat house or in the rabbit house. I am quite sure I gave them all water. Kurt said that it had been a very hot day, maybe that’s the explanation. No biggie in any case. They are all fine. Nina is missing though. Jannie didn’t see her on Sunday or Monday and they hadn’t seen her yesterday either. That is a little worrying. I really hope she will come back soon. Otherwise I will be paranoid that it’s my fault. But that’s silly. As I said, the first thing that happened when I got to the playground was her coming running up to me. And while I parked my bike she sort of casually walked around the door, as if she didn’t want me to know that she really wanted to go inside. When I opened the door she darted inside, while I turned off the alarm. And she went straight to her bowl of food. It had already been placed on a table so I didn’t even have to feed her. I did refill it though and gave her some fresh water. And when I let her out she was walking around normally while I was feeding the other animals. So it’s not like I did anything wrong. But I am apparently the last one who has seen her. And I can be awfully insecure.

I hope she’ll turn up. Soon.

I hope Moomincat will pop in soon too. I haven’t seen him in ages. I am probably to blame for it, what with spending more time at the playground because of the goat kids and trying not to stay home in bed all day depressed. So my window has been close more often and maybe he has found other roofs to fiddle on. I did see the back of him once, walking by the window outside. But he was gone before I could open the door and see if he wanted to come in.

Man, I need a cat of my own.

Oh yes, Annie Lee, in case you didn’t see my response to your comment I just wanted to say a thank you, a little late, but I very much appreciated your note.
As I appreciate all your notes. Having a connection to such nice people, that helps me a lot. In all my ups and downs.

So, I’m sure you’re all wondering how my first day of work at the playground went. And let me assure that it went just fine. No worries.

Although I hurt my back. Mostly from chasing goats I think. They escaped. Twice. The lock on their door is sort of tricky and I guess I didn’t get it completely shut. So they busted out. I managed to get Mads and Magnethe back inside. Then when I tried to get Mathilde in through the door, Mads came sprinting out again and Magnethe followed him. And when I tried to stop them Mathilde got free too. So had to start all over. Phew haha.

Goats are hard to control. It’s impossible to push them. And if you pull them then they’ll dig their heels in. Even if you’re pushing them towards a giant bunch of tasty treats, they will still dig their heels in and refuse to be pulled. At least these goats will.

That along with the carrying of food and water kinda busted my back. But other than that it went fine.

The first thing that happened when I got there was Nina the cat coming running up to me. I had to feed her too. I thought she was just a wandering cat who happened to come by the playground every now and then. But she actually has a little shelter thingie in the rabbit house. And when I locked myself in to the playground’s main house she came in with me and got herself a bowl of special fodder. She has kidney problems. Poor little thing.

After she had food and water I went to get started on the other animals. First off was Yvonne. Mrs Piggy. I was told to start with her cause she’s the most impatient one. Apparently. Personally I find it hard to believe that anyone can compete with the goats, but okay. I couldn’t find the big shovel/spoon thing that I was supposed to use. I spent some time looking after it. Then I gave up and used a pitcher and tried my best to estimate the right amount. The paper I had said “5 pig pills” and that meant 5 shovelfulls. So it was a little tricky to measure. After I was done with Yvonne’s food it occured to me to check the playground house. And there was the shovel thingie. I imagine they had brought it in there so I could find it easily. Hah. But those were the only two problems, the goats and the shovel thingie. Other than that everything went smoothly. I had been most worried about Musse, the horse. Handling her on my own. But I needn’t have worried at all. I didn’t really know how to put the reins on her properly. But she walked calmly with me, I didn’t even need reins to pull. So I let her out on the pasture and continued to feed the rest of the animals. And when it was time to take her in, I just called for her and she came to me and walked peacefully back in her stable. Easy peasy.

Felt sort of funny feeding them all. The sheep baahing for me. The goats maahing for me. I almost felt like a farmer. Old McPlume he had a farm…

I had expected to spend only 30 minutes or so. But it took more like an hour and 30 minutes. With the chasing of the goats and the looking for the shovelspoon and the generally learning where everything is and so on. I didn’t take into account the fact that Jannie always had her parents to help her and she knew how to do everything in the optimal amount of time. It was a little cocky of me to think I could do it in the same amount of time on my own and without having done it before. I imagine it’ll be around 45 minutes in the future. Taking it leisurely and having a good time with the animals.

All in all it was really nice. I hope I didn’t make any mistakes. I handled the alarm in the house ok. Remembered to lock all doors and turn on the alarm again when I left. I’m pretty sure I didn’t kill any animals. I remembered to get Æsel inside. You know, the old rabbit who runs around where he pleases. I had to make sure he wasn’t off somewhere while I locked up.

I’m looking forward to doing it in the future. It’s a good feeling. To actually work. A legit job. Responsibility. And if I can just make sure not to let the goats escape then it won’t be too hard either.

Tomorrow I have the day off. And I will rest my back. Then Tuesday I have to see my therapist and Wednesday I have to see my doctor. And then we’ll see what happens.