Cheese
January 19th, 2025Good goat times today. An absolutely stunning morning with a glorious goldenred sunrise. I wish I’d taken a picture with the view outside my building, it was a gorgeous sky.
Freezing cold though. With frost or maybe light snow all over. But so pretty.
Freezing, but thankfully most of the water is gone. The goats appreciated that. I went down in the big pen with Bella and Luna and walked around for a bit. Sky was standing on the hill bleating at us. She did not want to go down in the frosty grass. A little later I closed the gate, keeping the big girls in the big pen, so I could spend some time alone with Sky. Always sweet to just sit with her.
We haven’t gotten any christmas trees yet this year. I hope we’ll get some, the goats love those trees. The neighbouring school promised to bring theirs, so hopefully they’ll come through. Need that fresh pine breath!
But now it’s time to get some soup breath.
13/1 2025
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Yeah, I wish I’d taken a photo when I left my building with the almost unobstructed golden sky. Here’s the view from outside the playground. You can an idea of the colours, even if most of it was hidden by the apartment blocks.
13/1 2025
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Frozen hill goats.
13/1 2025
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I narrowly avoided disaster today.
After the goating I went shopping in the grocery store. It’s actually been more than a month since I last did that I think. I have gone almost completely to the delivery service now.
But there was something I wanted that the delivery service doesn’t offer. Peanuts for the goats, in fact. And I didn’t even get that in the grocery store, boo.
But anyway. When I was packing my groceries I put my wallet in my coat pocket, which is a bit of a loseey pocket. You can see where this is going..
I was halfway down the street when I realised… I didn’t have my wallet. Frantically checking all my pockets, heart racing.
So then i had to run back to the store. Thankfully i had only gotten a couple of minutes away. I got back in and went to cash register and started looking and the cashier looked at me and said “are you looking for this” and held up my wallet. Ooh boy, was I relieved. Good thing I sort of stand out, with my scruffiness and blindness and paying cash taken from my wallet, unlike most people these days with their cards and phones and whatnuts. The cashier had no problelm remembering me, and gave me my wallet back and I thanked her muchly. And goat bless the people who found the wallet and gave it to the cashier instead of running away with it.
I actually have quite a bit of cash in it, since I only pay with cash when I do go to stores. But the cash wasn’t what worried me most. It was more my bus travel card and social security card. I’d hate to have to deal with cancelling the card and getting new ones. And the key to the goat place is in my wallet. I don’t keep my house keys in the wallet though so at last I wouldn’t have lost those. But yeah, just dealing with all that would have been such a bummer and you know me and my avoidant personality. Glad I dodged that bullet.
13/1 2025
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goatlog
14/1 2025
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Got an hour forrtyfive on the bike today. Good session. Working hard. Trying to be good.
Going back to the grocery store yesterday for the first time in a month really had me craving lots of things. All the temptations on the shelves. I want some corn flakes. Some pistchio nuts. Granola. Cashews. Cake. THe grocery store has a cupboard kind of thing with freshly baked goods. With cakes. I used to get those. And I am such a slave to my addictions that for a while, before I got on my health trip, I would eat cake every day. They were pretty small cakes, so I ate like 2 or 3 a day. And since I only went grocery shopping once a week, I ended up buying like 20 cakes so I’d have for a whole week. Oh man. AND I MISS IT. I miss being gross and fat and not making an effort. I want protein bars and banana chips and
ok ok. I’m trying to be good. There’s a part of me that wants to be good. And a part that wants to let go and eat all the things I want. The constant struggle of the sugar addict.
14/1 2025
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Slightly obsessed with this song right now.
14/1 2025
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Dreams of fresh grass in spring, as all things must grow with the season.
14/1 2025
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*opens fridge*
THERE IS ONLY ZOUP grrrrowl
14/1 2025
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I have been feeling some crushing depression last night and today. So that’s fun. I slept a lot but I am still tired, tired to the bone.
Yeah yeah yeah. Hey oh hey oh, One foot in front of the other, one day a day.
15/1 2025
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Think goat thoughts.
Thank you everyone.
15/1 2025
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Hey thanks everyone for the good thoughts and advice. Just want today to be over really. I think my blood pressure may be too low. I have been feeling even colder than usual, kind of woozy, tingling lips, and another ehm personal.. thing.. that could indicate something with blood pressure. Feeling less cold right now, maybe it’s better. I am tired, just want to sleep. Maybe I haven’t eaten enugh and overdid it on the exercise. Or maybe the aliens have found a way to beam their xrays through my tin foil hat, you just never know. They’re tricksy. They keep stealing my socks, but only the left ones which is really weird. Maybe aliens only have left feet. Or maybe they prefer to go sockless on their right feet. What am I, the alien expert? Do you own research.
Anyway, i’ll be fine. Just gotta make it to bedtime.
15/1 2025
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Good goat times today. Warmed up tiny bit, at least it’s not freezing. A sweet day with visitors from the neighbour school. Regulars like Svend and Beren. Beren is always so happy to see the goats. She wanted to hug the goats. Luna was sitting next to me on the bench and Beren put her arms around her several times to hugs. So sweet. And she was petting Bella and then Bella started nibbling at her hand and she giggled and went “it’s tickling me!”. She wanted to hug Sky too, but I had to tell her that Sky doesn’t really like that. Sky doesn’t like when you put both arms around her, even just putting both hands up on her face will sometimes make he move away. I think she thinks you’re trying to constrain her, grab a hold of her. I won’t call her neurotic, but she’s a bit of a worrier and always on guard. Sensitive to danger signals. So no hugging Sky. She loves being cuddled with one hand though.
And yes, it was really nice to have Luna sitting next to me on the bench. Doesn’t happen a lot in the cold seasons. But today she got up on the bench and plopped herself down next to me. Dozed off for a little nap with her head in my lap. And Bella was on the playset next to us, and Sky came over in front of the bench and I cuddled her while stroking Luna too. It was really nice having all three close to me. That doesn’t happen too often anymore. At least not for longer, quiet periods like this. Treasure the moments.
Oh and one of the adults from the school asked about our new sign. I told her that a friend from Facebook had sent it to me. She thought it was really great. People like it!
Now, souie soup soup.
16/1 2025
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Love when Luna sits down next to me.
16/1 2025
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Oh no! Oh no no no. David Lynch. Oh my heart is broken. Rest in peace. I can’t even begin to put into words what his work has meant to me.
Absolutely crushed. I hope his dreams will live on.
16/1 2025
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As we grow older, our heroes pass on. Lots of amazing wonderful people have passed, deaths that have rocked the world. None of them made me cry.
I am crying now.
If there’s a white lodge, I hope David Lynch is there.
16/1 2025
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I think I’m going to treat myself to some pizza today. Seems like a good day for pizza.
I had a tiny bit of lucid dreaming last night. Not really a lucid dream, but I became aware that I was dreaming in the dream. It’s always a fascinating feeling. Like being in a David Lynch movie.
17/1 2025
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Perfect composition and lighting. 10/10, another triumph for the master photographer.
17/1 2025
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Lots of hearts need fixing. There’s so much hate for the ones who love.
17/1 2025
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Pizza update:
I tried a new place today. I use this takeaway portal with lots of places and I noticed a new one, located close to where I live. I thought I’d give them a try. And, it was great. Better than my usual place. And delivery time was half of the usual ones. I may have found a new favourite place. So that’s something.
17/1 2025
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Bella’s horns are getting pretty big. Well, the rest of her is too.
17/1 2025
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goatlog
18/1 2025
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So, Trump is donating his presidential salary? Cool. How about the millions he’s now making by scamming his followers with a memecoin?
It’s so fucking predictable. Cryptobros and oligarchy circlejerking into the face of the common people. And they all bend over and take it.
And how about the inauguration? Scaled back now? So what about the millions donated by corporations and rich people, are they going to be used to first aid and disaster relief instead, sorry can’t finish the sentence due to laughing fit.
Hawk Tuah girl and Trump, the only difference is one of them has only been scamming people for a few months, the other all his life. I’m sure he hawks on Putin’s dong.
Okay. I told my self not to talk politics anymore, the next four years is going to be a long decade. And nothing matters.
Felons gonna felone.
Good luck getting into heaven when you spent your money on memecoins and golen shoes and signed bibles instead of charitable causes.
fkfkfkfkfkfkf
18/1 2025
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Think goat thoughts, with Bella.
18/1 2025
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In the spirit of full disclosure: Today I got a delivery of Pepsi and protein, and I added Ben & Jerrys and cheese. You know how long it is since I had cheese? I mean, I’ve had it on pizza of course. But a slice of cheese on bread? May be a year or more. I have been craving a grilled cheese sandwich.
I’m going to try to make one tomorrow, on a pan. I wish I had one of those toast maker machines.
But I have been struggling for a while, so I’m ging to treat myself and give in to my cravings and enjoy it for a little. Before getting back to healhtier ways again. I’m only human. Until I can afford the procedure.
In other things, here follows a long ramble about media I am currently consuming. Feel free to tap out.
I read Three Eight One by Aliya Whiteley. Really loved it. Not sure the ending was as satisfying as I had hoped, but the journey was fascinating. I love that feeling of unease and the mystery. I am always more about the questions than about hte answer, David Lynch taught me that.
Now I am almost done with All Fours by Miranda July. A bit more of an adult book than I usually go for, in that it’s not scifi or fantasy or supernatural. And also it’s pretty explicit in places. But I love Miranda July, great writer and she narrates the audiobook too and does a great job.
Next up will be Time Out Of Joint by Philip K Dick. Reading Three Eight One made me go to reddit and search for “books where things aren’t what they seem”. a few Philip K Dick books were suggested and I realised I have some of those on my hard drive, so i’m going to read that next. Going to get some dick from my hard drive, yeah yeah.
On the TV front, I completely loved Skeleton Crew which just finished. The most enjoyable Star Wars in a long long time. Since the first Mandalorian seasons. Just so charming, so much fun, so cool. Goonies in space, you gotta love it. Unfortunately the ratings haven’t been good, so there probably won’t be more seasons. But it was a great self contained story. I do hope we see more of Jude Law’s character, even if it’s in other media.
Also started watching A Man On The Inside. I have known for a while I had to watch it, because I just adore Ted Danson. And because it’s by Michael Schur who made The Good Place, which is one of my alltime favourite shows. The description of A Man On The Inside made me think it’s a more sentimental thing, but the first episodes have made me laugh, I am really enoying it so far. Ted Danson is predictably wonderful.
I have started watching The Hobbit movies. The extended versions are only 3 hours instead of 4 like LOTR! I have put off The Hobbit movies for so long. While I have misgivings about the stretching of story and addition of new characters and all that, I must say I have enjoyed what I have watched so far. Peter Jackson’s Middle Earth is just a place I enjoy being in. And as I said when I talked about Lord Of The Rings, Ian McKellen as Gandalf just makes me really happy and I am glad to have more of that.
Sorry, cheese makes me word farty.
And I desperately need the escapism, more than ever.
18/1 2025
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Don’t take any wooden memecoins.
18/1 2025
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Now where am I supposed to post my twerking videos?!
19/1 2025
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That was a good grilled cheese sandwich!
Yum. I wish I had some good cucumber with it. But it was nice to have some cheese.
Now I’ll just sit here and wait for the depression to lift.
.. any time now.
In other news, I really hate how Dave Chappelle can’t get through an snl set without puffing on smokes. The idea of smoking making you cool just angerfies me. If I could change one thing about David Lynch, it would be the smoking. I used to always cringe when I saw him smoking in interviews and behind the scenes material. Who knows how much longer he would have been around if he hadn’t been a smoker?
But what are you going to do. I don’t really like Chappelle, but I actually quite liked his snl set. Other than the smokes.
Also, I will literally give five hundred buckazoids to whomstever can get me a complete colletion of the Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. There’s a youtube channel that has a lot of the shows, and I’m really enjoying those. But I really wish I could get a copy of the complete collection of shows. I used to download the shows after they aired back in the day. I dearly wish I had kept them instead of deleting them after watching. Little did I know how much I would have treasured them twenty years later.
I yearn for the past. The present is horrible and the future is bleak. We have to go back.
Good cheese tho.
19/1 2025
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The roundness of Sky.
19/1 2025
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That’s all for now.
