Today was a long day. A long and lovely day.
Everything went. We got two lovely new baby goats. No matter how bad I feel, baby goats can always make me smile. They are wonderful.
I am going to write it all out tonight, and there will be more photos and video. Just one photo for now.
And a question, for the English speaking folks. About names. I was allowed to name one of them, and while thinking about it I got stuck on the name Lille My. Little My. She is a character from the Moomins, in case you don’t know. Now, the problem is of course that My is a word in English and I do all my writing here and on Mia’s page in English. I am not sure if it would be a problem. What do you think? Do you think Little My would be okay? While thinking it over, for whatever reason I suddenly thought of calling her Myg. That is the Danish word for mosquito, so I mean it’s weird and dumb. But I kinda of like that better than just a human name. It’s also three letters with a Y, which goes well with Sky. But then.. Myg I don’t think sounds great in English either really. I think Jeanette said that they would go with Lille My for the playground, but I could always call her Myg on Facebook. What do you all think? Would you go with Myg on here or keep her with one name. Little My. Kind of makes me wish we could call the other one Me, so we’d have Me and My. But the kids at the playground will name the other one. I already heard Ronaldo being suggestions, so at least someone else is worse at coming up with names than me! Haha. Let me know if you have an opinion on Little My or Myg. And otherwise enjoy the photo and I’ll tell you more later.

19/6 2023
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Currently writing about today’s adventures, but I thought I’d just post a little picture of our new herd. Sky saying hello to the babies. it’s a grab from a video, so the quality isn’t great. But thought it was cute.

19/6 2023
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Well, it was a big day today. I spent a couple of hours with Sky in the morning. Just relaxing and waiting for the later happenings. There was a moether with a sweet baby who came and said hi and they came into the goat pen and got to pet Sky. And feed her carrots.
And then it was time to head out. We were supposed to be 4, but one guy had called in sick. So it was me and Jeanette and Mohammed (not sure how to spell his name properly). Felt like the trip was quicker than the last time we went, maybe becausea now we knew exactly where we were going. And the whole thing was very quick. Got there. Picked the two kids. Went back. There was no fuss at all. I was a little worried, and felt bad, about taking the kids from the mothers. I hate having to do that. But I try to take comfort in the fact that they were accidental pregnancies and there was no way they could have stayed, at least they get a good home where they will be loved and treated well. With treats. We got them wrapped in a towels to keep them still. Jeanette and I sat in the backseat, each with a goat in our lap. No fuss at all. A couple of times one would bleat and the other would start bleating, but they barely made a sound. For the first and hopefully last car ride of their life.
I was curious to see how Sky would react to the newcomers of course. Her reaction was pretty much “What the fork is this”. Well, she was pretty chill. But she was following them around. It was pretty cute, it was like she was stalking them. And she did chase them a bit and headbutt a bit. Trying to assert her dominance and defend her territory.
And the minis? They seemed like they were just home. They immediately started grazing. Their old home was lovely, but it was a small pen with no greens. I imagine people may have brought leaves for them maybe, but I think this was their first time ever on grass. And they were like kids in a candy store. Literally. The first hour or so they just walked around and ate grass and weeds. Sky following them around.
I’m telling you, it’s going to be a nightmare for me to tell them apart! Hah. When they are standing next to each other I can tell that Little My(g) is smaller. And her fur is a little darker. And I think her ears are whiter. But as soon as they are immediately next to eachother I am totally lost. Haha. If they grow to the same size I’ll be doomed. Oh and their eartags are the small round kind. Which is better for them and may make some people less angry. But it does mean it’s really hard for me to see their numbers. The little one is number 13 and the big one is number 14.
I sat with Lil in the car by the way. She is so sweet. I guess she must be a little younger than the bigger one? I don’t know their exact birth dates. They are half-sisters. Same father, different mothers. So i guess it makes sense they weren’t necessarily born at the same time and one is a little older. I don’t know. The little one does look more babyish. They don’t have the chubby cheeks that Milo and Sky had.
Anyway. Where was I. Yes, so that’s how the first time went. The minis just walking around eating green, now and then running from a Sky train incoming. Once Sky settled down a little she started eating greens too. Eventually sitting down up on the mountain while the minis grazed. They went up on the mountain too.
So the introduction went pretty well. I had to explain to some of the staffers that you know, it’s normal goat behaviour to butt heads. Milo and Sky did that too. And I was expecting this kind of meeting, Sky who has been through a lot lately a little unsure about the newbies, wanting to make sure she’s the boss. She made these guttural sounds sometimes that I have never heard her make before. But I have heard many goats make them. They are the kind of instinctual sounds that the bossy goats make when the lesser goats are a little too near, especially if there is food involved. Mio would practically growl. Milo was making them a bit during his last days here too, when he had been upgraded to being boss, if I tried giving Sky treats he’d make them sometimes.
But normal goat behaviour. It will take time for them to get used to eachother. I do hope they will gel into a unity, bond and be family. But time will tell. There may always be some kind of divide between them, but as long as they can live together and get along to the goat degree, that will be good. I wish that Sky will adopt them and be their lil mama, but time will tell.
We did get some circus time eventually. It started with Sky chasing the two of them around and then it evolved to some silly running and jumping, Sky was racing up the mountain, up the hill, back to me and jumped up on the overturned tub with such speed that she slid right back off it. Then got a treat and then ran some more, with the kids running around too. It was good to see Sky with that kind of energy again. Playing like a kid.
I was happy to see how the minis just settled right in. All that green is a great distraction from the potential confusion and worry and fear. It was like if you dropped me in a giant bowl of soup, I would not drown I’d just start eating.
The only time they got a little unhappy was when it eventually started raining. That was the first time they stared bleating for more than a single blerp or two. Little unhappy kid bleats. Aw. I guess they didn’t really know where to go to get dry. And Sky was in the goat house entrance, like a guard goat keeping them out. Eventually i went and got the lil one and carried her in, the other one following. Into dryness. But Sky chased them out again. Yeah, they got along ok mostly but in close quarters there’s no doubt that Sky will need time before she accepts that. They went under the tree instead and it wasn’t raining that hard so it was okay. They came inside for a bit later on too.
That is the basics of our day. There’s some more stuff to tell, but I’ll save that for later I guess. Mostly I just followed them around. Gave them space to get used to the new place. Sat down and watched them. Made sure to give Sky lots of treats and cuddles and reassurance too. She’s used to being the baby of the pen, now suddenly there are new and cuter kid around. I didn’t mean that! You know, it’s great to have distractions and happy things happenind and goat babies are pure magic. But they are not going to magically mend all that is broken in me. It’s like… painkillers. I guess. They can take the pain away for some time, but they can’t fix it. Maybe time can. Maybe not. But Sky is my boo, we have been through a lot. And I want to do my best for her.
I am still thinking about the name thing.
19/6 2023
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More stories from today.
The minis are already attuned to the treats. I thought it might take some time, but they learned quick. I was feeding a pear to Sky, and she dropped a piece on the ground. So it was no longer good enough, of course. I thought I’d see if the minis wanted it, since they were just peeking in to the goat house then. And they did want, maybe a little hard for them to get to grips with, but the were smunching on the stuff. So I tried raisins, and they took them too. The lil one especially got eager for more, was jumping up my leg to beg for some. So that was sweet.
There was also another sweet one in the pen today. A very nice boy. I think his name was something like Mihail, or similar. He was actually there when Milo left too. And he seems very kind and caring, several times asking me how I was doing and coping and talking about how hard it was to say goodbye to the goats etc. Honestly he seemed more empathic than I’d expect from most boys aroudn that age, maybe 13-14 ish. He was very good to the goats too, he came into the pen today and was patient and good to the babies. Sometimes you see boys who seem to get a joy out of being dominant and mean to animals. And you feel sad about it and wonder what happened to them and how they will grow up to be. But then you meet kids like this too, who are good and sweet and enjoy being nice to the animals. And I always try to be nice and help give them good experiences with the goats, and listen to them and answer their questions.
Anyway, on the day Milo left that boy told me how much he was missing Mia too, which immediately endeared him to me. And I was showing him and one of the staffers how Milo could shake hoof. Which they were quite amazed by. And today he asked if Sky could do it too. So I showed him that she could. And he asked if she’d only do it with me. I told him i didn’t actually know. He was going to try to do it, but just then Sky was walking away. But a little later the boy was sitting on the bench. And he called for Sky. And Sky walked over to him, and he reached his hand out. And Sky gave him her paw. And he was so thrilled. SHE DID IT! SHE’S SO SMART! That was really lovely. And he was asking questions about the goat behaviour and Milo and about me too. It’s always nice when you meet good kids like that.
I think that’s all for now. I need to get to bed soon. So tired. This was another day where I stayed at the playground longer than I usually do. We went to get the babies around noon and of course I had to stay with them as long as I could, to enjoy them and to help make them feel at home and help the transition with Sky and everything. It’s hard work being a goat man. Yeah yeah, I know. I’m just a lazy bum hanging out with goats. I didn’t choose the goat life, the goat life chose me.
Another photo to give some aws. I will try to get some video up at some point, but more important to spend time with Sky and the babies than to edit footage right now.
Thank you all for being with me in the good and the bad and for being company to a lonely heart.

19/6 2023
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Good times with the little and the minis today. Everything is going well. The babies were a lot more vocal today. Lots of bleating when they wanted attention. But they seem to have settled in nicely. And things are progressing with Sky. Today there was less chasing, and more sniffing face to face. Still some chasing of course. There was several bouts of almost-headbutting too. Both the minis and Sky reared up to do it. I don’t think they ever connected heads, but they went up on two legs to challenge. Good that they aren’t just running away from Sky. That’s goat communication. They were pushing eachother around a bit too, the bigger girl trying to push the smaller one away for cuddles and treats. They loove treats. I tried cucumber and tomato today and they snarfed it down happily, along with the pears and rasisins and deshelled peanuts and all teh green in the vicinity. They have quickly learned the upside of being in Lasse’s goat family. Yum yum get some. And they are cuddly too, climbing up on my lap and legs and enjoying the attention. Super sweet. It is nice to have some happiness.
I think Sky is feeling better too. She barely bleated today. The first day or two after Milo left she was screaming a lot. She calmed down then but still occasionaly go into bleating sessions, calling for him I guess or just general complaining. Today almost no bleatins, no prolonged sessions at least. Well, until I left. But even then she was screaming as desperately or as long as when she was on her own. Even though she’s still defending her status and territory and giving them the ‘you little punks are not welcome’ routine, I think having them here has already perked her up a lot.
And as a I said, less chasing today. They went out grazing together all three of them. The minis side by side and Sky with a little space to them of course, but all of them grazing in the same space without problems. Later the minis sat down on top of the mountain in the sunshine, and Sky sat at the foot of the mountain with me and it was all very idyllic. They had spent the night together inside too, I am sure there was some commotion, but I think it’s going well. It will take some time, probably months, before we’ll see if she really adopts them as her own, or if they will always be a little apart. But it’s looking good in general.
Oh and today I met a salamander! I was sitting with the goats and heard Jeanette talking to some visiting kids about it. And then she came to the fance and asked if I wanted to see it. The cutest tiny little lizard monster in the palm of her hand. Really sweet.
20/6 2023
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Look at that cutie! And the goat isn’t bad either! Tee hee.
I think this is the smaller one. Right? Maybe. Honestly I’m not sure. Maybe you guys with better eyes can tell.
But I hope so, because this is a post about the littlest one’s name. A decision has been made. And, we took a bit of a left turn.
Someone on Mia’s page said that if there is a Sky then there must be a Sun and a Moon. And then someone replied that for moon it could be Luna. And I loved that. When I was a kid there was a long running children’s show, one that everyone in my generation watched, and it had a character called Luna who was the sweetest loveliest woman who sang lovely songs. And the name is just lovely and simple and works well in English and Danish and I just like it. So. our littlest girl is now Luna. I did like Myg a lot, I thought it was funny and weird and unique. And I love the Moomins so much so Lille My would have been nice too. But eh both of those just didn’t work so well. So. I hope you like it, thank you for everyone who gave suggestions and inputs. At the end of the day a name is just a name. In my experience, once a goat has lived with a name for a while it just becomes … it. There have been names over the years that I weren’t crazy about at first. But after a while the name becomes the goat and the goat become the name and then one day you couldn’t imagine it any other way. A goat by any other name would still lay berries as sweet.
It would be nice if we could have the bigger girl named something related to the sun, but given that the kids at the playground will name her I think we will just be hoping she won’t end up being called Ronaldo. We’ll see about that. But little Luna 13 is a doll.
Whether it’s her in the picture or not…

20/6 2023
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Hey, look at little Luna. She’s going places! Jeanette saw her up there and asked “did you put her there?!”. Nope. I guess the platforms aren’t too steep for baby goats, she got up there just fine. I did pick her up and put her back down just to be careful. But that.. that must be the first time anyone has been up on that one. I know Sky could climb the other one. But not this one.

20/6 2023
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Video from yesterday, the arrival. And stalking.
20/6 2023
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Baby goaten morning.

21/6 2023
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It’s been a while since we had a Goat Butt Parade.

21/6 2023
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We have had several groups of visitors in the goat pen already. And it’s a whole new experience. When Milo was here we had to take the kids in two at a time and pay careful attention and I’d preoccupy Milo and if Jeanette wasn’t there they couldn’t come into the pen at all. Now don’t get me wrong, if it was up to me I’d much rather have Milo there and find ways to make it all work. But I understand that this is the way the playgrounds are supposed to work, now we can just take all the kids in and let them walk around with the goats. Everyone having a lovely time. “Look they have eyes! And a butt!”. Feeding them carrots. And I was happy that Sky got attention and carrots too, even though the babies obviously get the most adoration. It is sweet and lovely and a good experience for everyone. And that is the concept of these animal playgrounds.
Bittersweet for me of course. Last I heard was that Milo’s new home is a ‘huge’ farm. And Jeanette talked about trying to get that video of him to me, but I don’t know if it will be possible and I don’t want to be pushy about it. She also talked about finding out exactly where it is so we might go visit Milo, but again I don’t want to get my hopes up too much, and right now even though there’s finally some happy things going on, I am still very tired and worn down. But we can hope.

21/6 2023
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Oh, here’s Luna on her way up the platform. She’s a lightweight.

21/6 2023
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Hey hey! Thank you so much Beverly Fish for the lovely card and the lovely words inside! It has sure been a difficult time. Thank you for thinking of me. Hopefully things are looking up, hope they will for you too. Love your art and thank you for being a friend!

21/6 2023
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w video of the kids up on the page. At the start I’m talking some Danish and you can hear me saying Lille My, in case you want to hear how it’s said. Not sure how clear it is though.
21/6 2023
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Good times with the little and the minis today. A lot quieter today. The babies weren’t hollering so much. I think on Tuesday they probably bleated so much because they realised they hadn’t seen their mamas in a while… and they were milk-thirsty. But today they were quite chill. When I got there all three of them were in the goat house together, with no fuss. So that was nice. But of course there was fuss as soon as I brought out the treats. When there are treats on the table then nobody is friends! But the littles are fast. And uncle has treats for everyone.
But it was quiet today. No visitors at all while I was there. And Jeanette not working today. The only human I saw was Jesper, the handyman. He’s very nice, we had a couple of good little chitchats. You know I’m not good at talking to humans, but it went pretty well. He’s got an 8 month old kitten, so that’s fun. And he told me he’s just coming back after being on sick leave because of a blood clot. Messed with his eye sight too, so we bonded a bit on that. But he said that even though he’s been on sick leave he was still earning vacation days, so now they’ll be making him take 5-6 weeks of vacation. Well good for him! But it might get in teh way of the platforms getting fixed right away. He’s walking around fixing stuff now, but I think the platforms are a slightly bigger job. We’ll see.
Other than that, just hanging out with the goat crew. They are getting along pretty well most of the time, when not competing for treats. They are walking around together a lot, still obviously split in two groups. But you know. Together apart. Especially the bigger girl, name To Be Determined, sometimes is close to Sky ,they’ll be side by side grazing sometimes. And they all sit down in the blazing sun. Again, of course some distance between Sky and the minis, but usually in the same region. And Sky just seems to be in better spirits. She’s not bleating the distressed or sad bleats. She’s not sitting down constantly. I think it is going really well.
Heck, when it was time for me to leave she didn’t even notice at first! Don’t know if I should be offended! When Milo was there and when she was on her own, as soon as I started stretching and packing my backpack, they or she knew what was up and started complaining. Today she didn’t notice. To be fair it was super hot and she was sitting on the mountains with those quick breaths they do when it’s hot and she was just chilling with the minis. They were too zonked in the sunshine to get up and follow me, as they usually would. She didn’t notice until I hopened the gate and went out. And even then she didn’t get up at first. She did start bleating but she didn’t get up until I was starting to walk away from the pen. And even though she bleated after me it wasn’t too much of hte panicked screams. So, I do think she’s doing better. And the littles are just grazing and chilling, chillin’ and grazin’, they seem like they are right at home. Enjoying all the treats too.
It’s nice to have some good feelings again. Even though the sadness is still there of course. I was sitting with Luna in my lap and she was sort of nibbling at my cap and I couldn’t help dearly missing how Mia would chew my face off with her smooches. I didn’t get my face chewed off today. But I did get a knockout punch the teeth. Sort of. Well I had Luna in my lap and she started squirming to get up and I was trying to hold on to her to put her down gently and the THWACK!. She didn’t headbutt me haha but she was swinging her head around and hit me right in the kisser. At least I ddn’t lose any teeth. Maybe I should bring a bag of aspiring along with the raisins and peanuts.
Anyway. I love little Luna and bigger TBD and biggest Sky. They are a lovely group.
22/6 2023
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Speaking of the platforms, we got ourselves a new platformer. I actually thought it was Luna who got up there again. And I thought so for a while, until I wanted to lift her back down to the ground. Wait you’re too heavy to be Luna… yup. It was TBD who got up there. Luna actually tried to get up there too, but didn’t make it this time. But TBD went up a couple of times. And sat there in the sun. This is kind of how the original intent was for the platforms, a good place to sit and sun yourself. But hopefully we can get them lowered still, at some point.

22/6 2023
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My view as I was packing my backpack to get ready to leave. Three goaties zonked out on the mountain.

22/6 2023
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New video is up on the page. Lots of cute running around. It started with Sky chasing the minis, and then it just got silly.
Oh and my notifications are borked again again, sorry if I’m missing comments.
22/6 2023
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And for the premium subscribers, a preview of a future video. Don’t worry, the minis are alright.
22/6 2023
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A very tired Sky to end the night, as I am tired too.

22/6 2023
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This place is weird, the goats have feathers and lay eggs here!

23/6 2023
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Feeling a little unwell. Very tired. As in, sleepy. I have noticed the last couple of days I was getting tired faster. Today very sleepy, in an unnatural feeling way. Maybe it’s the heat getting to me. Maybe it’s all the stuff going on that is wearing me down. Maybe I’m coming down with something. I think i’ll try to go to bed early and actually sleep in my bed instead of in the chair tonight. We’ll see if that helps. It’s been a rollercoaster lately.
23/6 2023
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But more fun, a goatlog from Monday. The full day of the new arrivals. Starting with Sky alone, then a quick trip to the Other Place and then the babies meeting Sky.

23/6 2023
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Here is Sky performing a visual representation of how I feel.

23/6 2023
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I am feeling a bit better still tired but more normal. I’ll be heading off to (my actual) bed in a bit and hopefully get some okay sleep. Here’s a sweet picture of Jeanette and a kid and some kids.

23/6 2023
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Baby goaten morning everyone. I had a nice night in bed. I still have trouble sleeping completely through. I wake up a lot. But it felt really nice to actually sleep in my bed. I think it may have been a couple of months since I did that last time Might have been before Mia’s passing the last time. Just gotten used to sleeping in my chair, even if I havwn’t been sleeping well. But hey, feelling decent right now. We’ll see if I get tired soon again. Hope you’re all doing well. I know I am terribly self involved at the moment (as opposed to.. every other time in my life..) but yeah I’ve had lot going on, thankfully now some of it is good too. Thanks for listening and sharing in my life + times.

24/6 2023
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Talked to my dad on the phone, and he wasn’t feeling too well. He was tired and had a headache and some other stuff. I wonder if maybe we’ve gotten each other down with something. I’m starting to feel pretty tired again, despite the night in bed. I’m not feeling too bad though, just sleepy. Well we’ll see, hopefully it’s nothing serious for either of us. i’m just taking it easy for the weekend, need energy to keep up with the baby goats.
24/6 2023
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On a brighter note, here is a fun little video from teh past week. I think there’s a Lasse somewhere under all the goats.
24/6 2023
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Meanwhile, in World News today.

24/6 2023
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I was trying to get some good shots of the eartags and I thought this picture turned out kinda cute. And I was able to confirm, their ID numbers are the ones starting with 000. Luna here is 00013 and TBD is 00014. There’s a longer number on the tag too, but I guess that’s maybe an ID of birthplace or something like that. But it’s pretty clear here, Luna is 00013. Not that i have any hope in heck of seeing the numbers when I’m running around with them, and even in a lot of photos the numbers are obscured by the ears. But oh well. I may end up tying a ribbon around her horns so I know who’s who.

24/6 2023
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Baby goaten morning.

25/6 2023
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Oh Sky is just working on her Keiko impression.

25/6 2023
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When you come home and you find the babysitter passed out drunk on the couch and the kids are just taking care of themselves.

25/6 2023
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That’s all for now.

Good times with the littles today. Another gorgeous sunny droughty day. Lots of laying about in the dust clouds. It was a noisy day. Some guy in a machine came and cut grass and weeds, thankfully not in the goat pen though. And there was something going on on the other side of the trees, some construction thing it sounded like. There were at least a couple of workers I could hear, they had a radio going but not loudly. But they were making lots of working noises, like metal on metal clanging noises. It wasn’t too bad, but it did startle the goats. Sky especially seemed concerned. She spent like 10 minutes standing on the mountain just STARING down at the corner from whence the noise came. She wasn’t acting like they usually do if they’re scared of a noise, where they will stare and then move to other positons and keep staring and regroups and stick close etc. She was just standing still and staring. Like a little Sky statue. Thankfully it didn’t last all day, we got some peace and quiet in the sun too.
12/6 2023
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Here’s Sky, froen to the ground, intently staring in the direction of the sounds of workers beyond the trees.

12/6 2023
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When someone asks me why I think goats are better than people.

12/6 2023
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Hey look, flowers have grown on the mountain! Haha it makes me laugh that the back end of the mountain is considerably more green than the front end. It’s almost as if Milo and Sky have been completely wrecking the front end with their running and jumping and pawing. Well, at least some of the stuff that Jeanette planted has come to fruition.

13/6 2023
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A little bit of video from yesterday. The greenery on the backend of the mountain, and Sky trying to wreck it. Also a little bit of the start of the construction noise that would entrance her later on.
I don’t want things to change..
13/6 2023
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Today was a long and brutal day.
Today was the hottest day of the year so far.
Today was the second saddest day of the year so far for me.
The terrible good news is that today Milo moved to a new home. I am relieved that we found a solution. But I am crushed and heartbroken and sick of it. I am so angry that we did this and so sad that i am a part of it. If it wasn’t for Sky I would not be going anymore. But I can’t abandon her now. It is one of the saddest things I have seen in my life, her walking around in the pen looking for Milo, screaming after him. She was looking out through the mesh fence over the sport field beyond the pen and screaming and then she turned to me and slowly her loud screams turned into little mewls that I don’t think I have heard her make before. As when they are sick and you have to do things to them, it is so hard to not be able to make them understand what is going on. Although there is no explanation that could have made things better today. She will have four sad days alone until we get the new babies on Monday. I can’t be there every day, but I will do my best to be with her. I feel so bad.
Milo will be living at a farm, as I understand it. To be honest I don’t think his life will be as good as that of a playground goat. But I think it will be considerably better than a agricultural for-profit farm and certainly better than the fate of a meat goat. It isn’t a happy ending, but we avoided the worst possible ending. I am still just sick of it. Seeing him taken away was painful.
I will write more about what happened today later. If I am feeling up to it, maybe tomorrow if not. Thank you everyone for.. everything. I honestly just wish I was dead. Thank you for caring and helping me go on.
14/6 2023
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Thank you everyone for the comments. You are beautiful, wonderful people and I am thankful I am not alone.
I want to point out that I have to continue to have a working relationship with the playground, for the sake of the goats. So I can’t just burn bridges all around. If you’re wondering why I’m not saying harsher things or why I’m defending things I don’t agree with etc. I am sure you can all imagine some of the things I’m thinking. I am thankful for Jeanette being a good friend to us and working hard to find a solution for Milo. And for the other people there who care. And also I understand very well that fears are irrational and hard to control. I am not afraid of little goats. But i’m afraid of humans and that has ruined my life and telling me not to be afraid of humans wouldn’t do a thing.
With that out of the way, I am just going to write out what happened today, because it always helps me to put things down on internetpaper. You already know the important parts so if you don’t want to read what will surely be a long rambling post I completely understand that. Thanks again everyone for the support and to those who worked with me to find solutions and offered suggestions. I appreciate that very much.
So, I hadn’t actually been planning to go see the goats today, because as I have mentioned frequently I am worn down mentally and physically. But then last night Jeanette told me that a man would be coming around today to look at Milo. So i figured I’d better buckle up and go. She couldn’t tell me when he’d be there, but I figured i’d go and if I was lucky he’d come while I was there and I could help with things if needed.
This morning I felt pretty sick. I don’t know if I ate something that was bad for me, or if it was the nervousness. I spent a lot of time yesterday talking to people in messenger and on my boosted poston facebook, working on potential soluitions, getting Jeanette to call places, it was a fatiguing day for someone like me who is not good at communicating with humans. So maybe that was why I felt sick too. I spent about 45 minutes on the toliet, sorry tmi. But I managed to get myself out the door and to the goats. Jeanette isn’t working anymore this week, I always feel better when she is there. But instead there was Sanne, and she is nice too. You might remember that time they messaged me to help give Milo a pill, that was her. I don’t see her very often, but she is always kind to me. And seems to care about the animals. I am not sure if she is one of the staff who are scared of Milo but.. well thinking about it now when we gave the pill to him that time she wasn’t, so I don’t think so.
Anyway. She said that she was really glad I had come today because she’d hurt her back and she thought she’d have to call someone to come help her open the goat door because she wouldn’t have been able to on her own. it’s a pretty tough sliding door. So she was glad I had opened up and let the goats out. And then we talked about Milo. At that point she hadn’t been aware that someone was coming to look at him. But we talked about that, and about calling the Århus division of the animal welfare association. I mentioned that yesterday, right? Angeline got in touch with the animal welfare society and got me to get Jeanette to call. And they old Jeanette that we had to contact the local division, and they weren’t open until today because it was so late. And the plan was that they have a shelter where Milo hopefully would be able to stay temporarily while they looked for someone to adopt him permanently.
That was the biggest hope I had yesterday. I think Sanne called them today as planned, I suggested to her that it would be a good idea just talk to them and we could always tell them that someone was coming to look at Milo and that we might not need the help. And as it turned out, we didn’t. A bit later on Sanne came out and told me that the man would be coming by to look at Milo around 1:30 pm. Normally I don’t stay that late. I know, I’m a wuss. But being out of my house for 5-6-7 is a lot for me and I have a hard time doing it. Normally I leave around noon. But okay, I figured I should stay. I wasn’t sure if my help would be needed, but I wanted to be there. Since I knew Milo would not be happy leaving, and he can be difficult to handle. I figured if I ws there I could talk him up and help make introductions if needed. And be with Sky afterwards.
So that was the original plan. I sat around with Milo and Sky. Did my best to enjoy my possibly last time with them both together.
I sat for a while in my chair and baked. In the sun. Hottest day of the year. I hadn’t slept well last night, still feeling somewhat sick. Almost dozed off. Was not feeling great.
At that point 4 big dudes with big dogs came around. Big fierce looking dogs. This part isn’t really important to the Milo story, but whatever. My first thought was, is this some kind of outing of the local dog owner gang or something. Then it dawned on me that it was police. With tracking dogs. They were searching for something clearly. They went all around the outside of the playground, around the outside of the fences of the pen and the pathways outside. I heard one say something like “he was shooting video here”. I don’t know what it was all about, but some kind of crime or criminal search. Obviously Milo and Sky were not happy with those big dogs and all the sounds of people in the bushes and dogs barking and officers shouting commands. They were pretty scared, and went up on the mountain and looked nervously around. The cops left at some point. When Sanne came back she asked if we’d seen cops too. I can’t remember if she said there had been 11 cops or 11 squad cars. But apperently it was something of an operation.
Anyway. Back to the sad story.
At around 1:30 what I had been thinking “don’t let this happen” happened. Sanne came over and said that the guy had postponed it to 3:30 pm. Ugh. I was already sick and tired, literally, baking in the heat, sad and depressed. Already outside longer than normal. So I told her, okay I think I have to go home then. She said she understood. I packed my backpack and headed out. Lots of treats to the littles who were upset I was leaving. I got out the gate. Looked back at them. Weighed everything in my head. If he’d come at 3:30 that means it would be over at 4 maybe, then i’d need time with Sky, then a walk home. I can’t remember the last time I have been outside around 5-6 pm, I know it will sound crazy to you, but that’s my life. Anyway, looking at Milo, hearing them starting to scream as they do when I leave.. I couldn’t bear leaving. So I got back in the pen and unpacked the backpack. And sat down with Milo and Sky, as they settled down too.
Sanne had originally told me that she thought it was just a first meeting type of thing. That the man was going to see if he was ‘compatible’ with Milo. And if so, then he’d probably come back in the weekend to get him. Now, that would have been a lot better for Sky. Less time alone. But then suddenly things went fast. The man came around 2:30 pm. So an hour later than originally planned, but an hour earlier than I feared. that was good at least, made it easier for me to make time with Sky afterwards. But yes, the man wanted to take Milo right away. There wasn’t a whole lot of introductions needed, I didn’t really need to tell him about Milo. He seemed to decide right away to take him.
The man actually recognised me. He knew me from the old old playground, the first one. At first I didn’t really understand. He was an immigrant, his Danish was good but not perfect. He said something like “my sons got married and you were with goats”. And at first i thought he was almost mocking me, like he was saying his sons got married and were normal people and i just sat around with goats. But no, he was being literal. His sons had gotten marriaged and they had had some kind of celebration in the neighbourhood of the first playground and I had been there in the goat pen when it happened. So that was sort of funny and nice. He asked about Alice, who was the leader there at the time, and who went to the second playground too. I think she has quit and is doing other things now. But anyway. So the guy has some history with goats and the local area. Apparently he has some kind of farm. The playground employee who was there now (Sanne had left because her shift was over by this time) said that a way to get Milo to come would be to grab one of the branches of the big tree because he loved those and would follow it. The man said “oh I have a lot of those on my property, a whole forest”. So it sounds like there is a lot of space and greenery. I do not know more details about his place or what he does. I don’t know if I will be able to get more information. I think there is not a chance really of getting more news or visiting Milo. I will try to find out, but I get the impression it is not likely. If he has that much property with greenery then hopefully his goats are happy and well taken care of. It has to be better than being sent to the slaughterhouse.
Now came the taking of Milo. I don’t want to go into too much detail, it was not fun. He was not happy. The fear and confusion was heartbreaking. No way to explain to him what is going on. It broke my heart all over again. I did my best to help and comfort him. I wish I could have spared him this. But i knew it would be difficult to get him to just come peacefully. I knew the only way he would go peacefully would be if he went completely away with a lethal injection from the vet. Any other scenario would be a stressful one. And it was. But I will spare you further details. The man drove off with Milo.
And then the heartbreak continued with Sky. I already talked about it. It hurt me so deeply to see her sadness and confusion. I sat with her. I gave so many treats. I also gave her some space at times to go around and search and call for Milo. I don’t know what is right in this situation, but I thought maybe it would be good for her to.. well to try to learn that he would not be there, would not respond, would not come back. I am sure it will take a lot more time, I wish i could make it easier for her. She eventually ran up the mountain and sat down, scouting out over the pen.
I feel really badly about splitting them up. I hindsight I wish I had done more to keep them together. I had told Jeanette that they should not keep Sky for my benifit if someone wanted both. But I should have demanded they stay together, even if it meant me losing both. I regret this now. But I regret all of this, and I try to tell myself again.. I can’t even fix myself and my life. I can’t fix everything for the goats. I am trying my best. I wish i had done better, but I know they would have been worse off without me over the years. I am only human. You know what we think about humans…
I spent as much time as I could with Sky. Eventually I had to go home, I need strength to be there as much as possible for her the next days. And at some point I had to leave, even though I wish I could just have spent the night therei with her. It was more heartbreak as I left, her screaming after me. All alone in the pen. It kills me. It will be a hard four days for her, I know. But she will get through those. And i will. And I hope she will be able to bond with the new kids. A lot of people still call her a baby, but she’s 5½. A good goat age to be a momma. I really really wish she will be able to be an adoptive momma of the new girls. I don’t know if that will happen. Maybe this has all been too distressing. We will have to see. I will do my best to make it all work.
I am sick and tired, literally and figuratively. I wish I could fix it all. But I can just try to survive the days now.
I know, many people have it much worse. Many animals too. There are wars and famine and plague. But here I am, and you know I feel these things. Thank you for feeling them with me, even though I wish they were happier feelings.
14/6 2023
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Got out and checked on Sky today. I was so tired I just wanted to sleep for 48 hours straight. But I had to go see her of course. She was screaming for me when she saw me. But generally she was doing fairly well, better than I had feared. There was this part of me that was thinking what if the heat and distress and sadness had jut given her a heart attack or something. But she was ok. There wasn’t a lot of screaming, while I was with her. A good deal of bleating and sad looks back at the goat house. Standing on the mountain and chewing her cud while staring out over the pen and beyond. It was sad, but she was at least pretty calm most of the time. I sat with her a lot. Tons of cuddles and treats, of course. Went and picked some branches and put them inside so she can have that.There was already a couple of little branches with greens put in her stack of hay. That means someone thought to do something nice for her yesterday after I lett. So that is good.
The thought of her locked up completely alone at night is so hurtful. We jus gotta get through these few days. Even if it takes time to bond with the kids, just having other goatsi n the pen will mean a lot. Goats should not be alone. I wish I could stay with her the whole time until the kids come, but I will do my best as much as I can.
The weather was feeling it too. Our long string of super hot sunny days was broken. A grey morning. And later the rain came. Not a whole lot, but some brief showers. Even the drought could not stop the heavens from crying for us. Okay okay I won’t quite my day job to go be a poet. The rain is good for the greens, and sitting inside and listening to the rain fall and Sky eating hay is not too bad.
I am just very tired and sad. But hanging in there. Zombie mode, getting through the days.
15/6 2023
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The last photo I ever took of Milo. Sky was sitting in the sunshine on the hill outside the goat house. And Milo sat down here in the entranceway in the shade. And that last I did before he went was sit with him there. Complicated feelings. On the one hand desperately hoping they would come to take him, so he would live. But realising that if my hope came true it would mean I would likely never see him again. And the heartbreak of both of them jus sitting there not knowing that everything was about to change.
I really hope he is doing okay. I hope he is settling in, I hope he gets love and friends. I hope the love I gave him helped him have a good life up till now, and I hope he will have a good life ahead. I wish animals were in charge of the world, humans not so much.
Thank you everyone very much for all the comments. I appreciate it a lot. Thank you for the support. Right now I don’t have the mind and strength to reply to every comment, but it really means a lot to me and I am humbled by the nice things you say about me, even though I have a hard time thinking nice things about me. Love you all.

15/6 2023
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Got out to check on Sky again today. She is doing fairly ok I think. Calmer today than yesterday, but in a sad kind of way. No doubt she is sad and lonely right now. I know the feeling. But pretty calm when I stay close to her.
Apparently she hasn’t been eating, Sanne told me. There was a lot of untouched feed in the trough when I opened up today. When I tried giving her peanuts she’d roll them around in her mouth and they’d pop right back out on the ground. But I de-shelled a couple and she ate those. And she ate all the raisins i’d give her. When I tried giving her a pear she didn’t want it, but I put the slices in the pan inside and she ate them from there later. So she is eating. She’s chewing her cud and laying berries. We just gotta get through a couple more days then we can hopefully start adjusting to a new normal, one that is at least better than what it is right now.

16/6 2023
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Well I got news about Milo. Good news, thankfully.
Firstly I just want to say that I do not expect to get regular updates about him but we’ll see.
Some of you asked about the man who picked up Milo, if he was just some rando who took Milo and disappeared. I must admit I hadn’t really thought so much of that, it happened so relatively fast and I was thinking only really about saving Milo, not so much about vetting the man.
But he’s not a completely random person. He is a friend or relative of someone who works at the playground. So there is some connection, for whatever that’s worth.
And today Sanne told me that the man who got Milo has sent a video of him to the person working at the playground (this person is not someone I have met, as far as I know). The video apparently shows Milo at the new home, hopping around and eating greens I think Sanne said. So. Milo got through the transport and is seemingly starting his new goat life. That’s a relief to hear. I am sure he has also been confused and sad and I am sure it will all take a lot of adjustment too, but it sounds like he is on his way to finding his new normal. And at least he’s alive. Sanne also told me that the local divison of the animal rights assoc got back to her and told her that they would not have been able to help. I don’t know why, probably lack of ressources and stuff. But that means that it was even more important that we found someone to take Milo. We weren’t completely out of options, Heather on here had reached out to Esther’s army and I think through them came up with someone in Denmark that might have taken him. I also got a message from a Danish person via the post I boosted on Mia’s page and he said he might take Milo. So there could still have been other options that might have worked out. But it was really close to a bad ending nonetheless. Now at least he is alive. I haven’t seen the video myself and I very likely won’t, but it sounds like he’s doing okay.
A couple of you have also shared your personal experiences of rehomed goats with me, and those have been uplifting. I think goats are good at adapting and living in the moment. I have to believe he will be okay. Even if I wish things hadn’t gone like this. He’s such a wonderful goat and it’s not fair that.. he has to be without me. Not that I’m anything special. But I’m pretty decent at hanging out with goats. And I loved hanging out with Milo. i hope things will start going better now. But it will never be the same, and I will never be the same. I will try to do my best for Sky and the new kids. But I feel like something has broken in me. Who knows when or if it will heal. Until then I guess I will just limp along best I can. One day a day.
16/6 2023
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A little bit of video from today, with Sky. As you can see, she is still snakeing down the mountain. Her tail is up and even wagging. Eating raisins. I don’t think she is depressed, I think she is sad and confused. Which is bad enough, but hopefully it will lift when she gets goat company again. Of course we’ll be keeping an eye on her to make sure she is doing okay and eating and all that.
16/6 2023
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A goatlog from Milo’s last couple of days with us. There is no video of him leaving. Obviously it’s still a sad video, but there’s nothing traumatic in it. I uploaded a few other goatlogs from the days before too, just to get it all up on my channel. Not that I expect people to watch through all the long videos. And there’s a part of me that thinks, what’s even the point now. But there’s also a part ofm e that enjoys the routine I guess of editing and posting and having it all there. There’s a couple of videos from when Mia was sick that I did not upload but other than that most of our journey is on film on that channel. 19ish years of goating. So much happiness and such heavy sorrow. That’s life, i guess.

17/6 2023
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Trying to relax today. Feeling physically beaten up and emotionally despondent. But trying to reacharge some energy. Next week will have some challenges too, but hopefully happy moments. I just wish i could go back, instead of forwards. Tick tock goes the clock, it won’t stop.
17/6 2023
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Tomorrow will be the two month anniversary of Mia’s passing. And the arrival of two new kids. I am depressed and bloated and suffocating in the heat. Just want to sleep. Here’s to hoping things will go okay next week. Keep smashing those atoms.
18/6 2023
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That’s all for now.