It’s A Cold And It’s A Broken Halleluja
(google cache)
The sun was out today. Beautiful. And deadly. My eyesight really doesn’t deal well with the sun. And isn’t that just great when you’re sitting here wishing for warmth and summer? Isn’t it just wonderful?
I hate walking around in this blur. It makes me feel like I’m not really there. Like I am not walking in the real world. But rather in a computer game circa 1998 when the 3D wasn’t so advanced. It kinda looks like the real thing, but it isn’t.
I can’t see people’s face either. It’s uncomfortable. You don’t know if you’re standing in front of a complete stranger or an old friend. I don’t have so many old friends around where I live. But if I’m up at the playground for example. I can’t tell if that person walking towards me is Kurt or if it’s Basil Q Bumpterridge. It’s awkward because if it’s someone you know then you don’t want to ignore them. But if it’s someone you don’t know then you don’t want to act like an idiot who smiles and says hi to complete strangers. Having social phobia doesn’t exactly make things less awkward either. I want people not to see me, not the other way around. What do you do when you hear someone saying “Hi” and you see some blurry character waving a little ways away. Do you wave back and hope they’re talking to you? Ugh. I hate it. Today I ran into the bus stop lady. Remember when I was at the Reva center and I helped that lady with the bus? She lives here in the neighbourhood, I have run into her before. When I could see. Now I just saw someone walking towards me. I was listening to Radiohead in my headphones. I wasn’t sure if this person was saying something, was slowing down, was coming straight towards me or just walking past me. So I just slowed down and tried to act in a casual way that could both be interpreted as “hey, I know you” and “hey, you’re a complete stranger”. Anyway, she’s a nice lady. Always happy to see me, on the rare occasion we bump into eachother. She asked how I was doing and I said “fine”. Did not feel up to talking about diabetes and blindness. She has gotten her retirement, which is what she wanted. So that’s good for her.
Do you know, I actually prayed today. I haven’t done that since I was.. 14? 13? I don’t know. Prayed for my eyes to get better. I know it won’t work since A) there is no god and B) if there was he wouldn’t reward someone who doesn’t believe in him. But I couldn’t help myself. Who knows, maybe a miracle will happen and I’ll be able to see again and I will become born-again Plume and my soul will be saved after all. Maybe it is all god’s masterplan.
You never know.
Speaking of the divine, I managed to make the pancakes today. So that was quite good. Also I got a card from Luis. Thank you, Luis! Although you damn near gave me a heartattack. I put the card on the table while doing some computer stuff. And absent-mindedly opened the card. And it started playing music. If it wasn’t for the precious gift of gravity then I would have jumped through the roof. I don’t think I have ever had a musical card before. Although I might. I wish my memory wasn’t so rotten. But a lovely card, Luis. Thank you.
Hiccup.
This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 17th, 2009 at 23:49 and is filed under Blogging. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
5 Responses to “It’s A Cold And It’s A Broken Halleluja”
1. d l Says:
March 18th, 2009 at 3:36
i came across this and it is so funny but i have nobody to share it with! who else is into both microsoft excel and monty python? nobody!
2. LuisLemmings Says:
March 18th, 2009 at 6:06
I’m sorry it scared you. Those cards can get really loud but I’m glad it arrived though a little late. Since you’re having trouble with your eyesight, I figured a nice card that played music would have been best.
As for the rolled tacos, it’s like regular tacos but rolled into a corn tortilla tube with shredded beef, chicken or pork though I prefer the beef.
The beef is flavored with spices and the whole tube is deep fried then covered with guacamole, shredded cheese, fresh cut tomatos.
You can buy them at these small Mexican hole in the wall restaurants. They come in three, five, or ten count rolled tacos. I love them because they’re crunchy and I LOVE crunchy foods.
They’re not fattening and they don’t make you full. So I usually buy three, a soda, and some tortilla chips with sala.
If you ever come to San Diego, I’m going to buy you some!! You won’t regret it!
3. Plume Says:
March 18th, 2009 at 19:15
d l – And we both hate spam too!
Luislemmings – Oh don’t worry Luis, I was only exaggerating for dramatic effect. It was a very nice surprise!
I’m ready for some tacos.
4. Debster Says:
March 19th, 2009 at 0:58
LuisLemmings: those tacos sound good. We don’t have anything like that around here that I know about.
We had some leftover cooked chicken that I put in a tortilla shell, then put salsa and shredded cheese on top. I folded it over and put in the microwave to heat it up and melt the cheese. Then when done, I put a bit of reduced fat sour cream inside. Yummy!
I also made white rice and then mixed a jar of salsa in it for a side dish with some shredded cheese on top. Not the “real deal” Mexican food, but close enough for us.
Plume: my Dad got a birthday card in November that played music (from my sister and husband) and when he opened it, I jumped! Just wasn’t expecting that, I guess.
Try praying to a “Higher Power” if it’s hard to think of God. A Higher Power could be anything and isn’t like for just one religion or another.
I believe there is a Higher Power out there that made all the animals, people, nature, etc. Someone or thing had to do that. Even if you believe in the “Big Bang” theory, I think a Higher Power could still have had something to do with that.
Prayer or meditation can help calm your fears, bring you back into the present moment, and keep you from dwelling on the future or the past. Even deep breathing and counting your breaths “in” and “out” can help relax and calm you.
5. Plume Says:
March 20th, 2009 at 0:10
DEbster – I’ll pray to the higher taco.
Now I’m hungry though.