Cheshire Smiles
It came back. The cat.
Yesterday. Early in the morning. I was woken by something landing on my bed. And I knew what it was. Turned on the light and got my glasses and there it was. The same cat, in through my window.
It jumped down and looked around a little and then got back up on my bed and curled up in a ball and layed there. While I watched it.
Amazing.
I’m going to agree with Anne and Katherine. It’s obviously not stray or lost. It must be a regular house cat, just coming to visit once in a while. It’s healthy and beautiful. It’s not starved for attention either. It sat on my bed for a while, then it jumped up in the window sill and sat there and looked out. And then jumped out and left.
I hope it will come back soon. It makes me happy. If I ever had any doubts about getting a cat then they are definitely gone.
Moomincat, I’m calling him. Or Mumikat in Danish.
Otherwise I have not actually been doing that great. I sat in the shower today and wondered if it would be possible to slit one’s own throat. Would a human being be capable of that? If you can slit your wrist, can you slit your throat? If you close your eyes, is there a difference?
But I will try not to think like that. Must press on. Think of sweet cats and goats. Of Mads bleating when he sees me through the fence and trees on the other side of the street. Of the twin lambs still being small and lovely.
I’m going to the library soon. To get a moominbook. And The Little Prince. And a “learn how to play the guitar, and don’t keep putting it off” book. And Høst + Den Gamle Biograf by Jacob Hedegaard Pedersen because those are the only of the Vesterbæk books that I haven’t read. He was publishing the first ones when I worked at Hovedland.
It will be good to read again. I hope.
January 5th, 2006 at 23:04
Da jeg var barn, sagde de gamle, kloge folk, at mavevrøvl og influenza gi’r depressioner. Så hold fast i det og la’ vær’ med at få go’e ideer. Forøvrigt kan dine oplevelser det sidste års tid sammenlignes med meget af det, Mumi oplevede, da han begav sig alene ud i en fremmed verden af sne. Næste stop : Troldvinter.
January 6th, 2006 at 13:35
So now we can come to the conclusion, that the cat really likes you ;) I can feel that you will become good friends.
Listen, bout those thoughts in the shower… I once wondered if it was possible for a person to break their own neck. Ewww. Plume, my comment on this is… get this ish out of your head, seriously :D There are so many things that can happen to a human being, that is kinda an ant in the universe’s hands, that thinking what a human being can do to himself is a waste of our precious time my dear ;) Focus on what the world can do for you and what you can give it in return. Sounds like a fair deal to me. And the world can give you lots of things… like a gorgeous Mumikat, snow, Tina Dickow, friends and me, who leaves long exciting comments in your blog (hehe :D).
Me wishes you a nice friday man :)
January 7th, 2006 at 4:04
The cat has claimed your bedroom as its own. That’s like a member of the royal family deciding your home is their castle. Cats are pretty picky about where they hang out.
I wish an elephant would climb in my window. Alas…the window is too small and elephants don’t like cities. I wonder if this is one of the Jedi kitties. A JediMoominkat? Perhaps the cat is your guardian angel. Like Santa visits the children, the Kat checks on her charge to make sure they’re ok.
Lasse, the suicidal thoughts may be your medication needing adjusting. It sounds like a brain chemistry thing (what do I know…???) but when you look at your life now, objectively, you’ve achieved so much, conquered many fears. This takes a lot of courage and willpower. Maybe it’s time for a checkup, and if you need more therapy and counselling, there’s no reason not to have it. I was in therapy for five years…saw my psychiatrist every two weeks for one hour. It’s not unusual for people to need therapy for awhile.
Anyway, I also want you to know I’m glad you are open about what’s happening with you and I hope my post doesn’t make you think you should stop talking about it. The opposite is true. We care and are here for you… please don’t hurt yourself. And if you’re tempted, please seek help right away.
January 7th, 2006 at 11:45
Katherine, you put it well in words! Thank you for trusting us Plume and sharing what you feel. It’s sometimes help in itself, but yeah, it would be a good idea to turn to a specialist if those thoughts come once in a while. The thing is that sometimes these thoughts are not controllable and you need a little help from aside or just someone to listen and give a good peace of advice. Might be a chemistry thing, I agree on that.
I wish someone came crawling through my window (well, a four-legged creature with fur and good intensions that is), but it’s very unlikely, cuz I happen to live on the 10th floor. Unless it’s a bird! Oh, that would be sweeeeet :) Maybe I should hang food from my window and wait.
Uh, and I’ve got a confession to make… I’ve never seen an elephant in 3D before. They are amazing creatures, I think I’m gonna go to the zoo this summer and check them out. Or a circus… but then I donno… I wish I could see one in his/her own habbitat. Cuz I’m not sure if people treat those sweeties well in zoo or circus.
A question for Katherine: is it true that sculptures of elephants with their trunks up bring good luck? Just wondering ;)
Dear Plume, don’t forget, we’re here for you, no matter what.
January 10th, 2006 at 22:53
Milla, Asian cultures have a tradition in their sculpturing and art that a trunk up brings good luck. Too bad it doesn’t bring elephants good luck though because most are horribly exploited. And the wild ones are losing their habitats. If you want to see 3D elephants that live naturally, visit http://www.elephants.com and click on their elecamera. It’s a sanctuary in Tennessee and the elephants are very happy there whether their trunks are up or down. Just knowing they are happy makes me feel lucky.