Election Night Special
I am not feeling too well. Hmm. Deja Vue? I hope I don’t sound like a broken record. I hope I don’t sound like a Britney Spears record either. And I hope I don’t sound like a hyena.
Seeing the doc on Friday. Will be upping my med dose, no doubt. If that doesn’t work then I don’t know what to do. I’m feeling out of my head. Like somebody opened up my skull and poured bleach in there and now my brain is swimming around.
The more I sleep, the more tired I am. I cannot stop drinking. I am sweating under the heavy blanket and freezing under the thin. My eyes will not focus. I am a hypochondriac but I am not feeling sick. I am reading Dawson’s Creek fanfic and drinking apple juice.
My computer is acting weird. Maybe I have been hacked. Maybe they are reading over my shoulder right now. Logging my keystrokes.
I am not being paranoid, but do you hear the bombers?!
November 10th, 2006 at 2:49
Do you and your doctor have a plan if upping your meds doesn’t work? You don’t sound too good and I wondered if you have an emergency number to reach your doctor (if after hours), or if you need to go to the hospital, etc? It’s best to have a plan in place if you’re not reacting well to the meds and feeling bad. I’m just concerned about you.
Please stay out of the liquor cabinet while you’re increasing medication or at least check with your doctor about alcohol/meds combination. You’re trying to “self-medicate” and I don’t think that will work out too well. Are all these side-effects you’re having normal & to be expected? I’m not too clear on just what you tell your doctor or not?
Sorry if I’m coming off as being bossy – you just don’t sound right to me. Please let us know how you’re doing, okay?
November 10th, 2006 at 9:03
Fanfic, yay.
November 10th, 2006 at 23:09
Deb – My therapist has told me that if I ever get too depressed or serious about the suicidal thoughts then I should call her. Or the emergency room, if I can’t get through to her. I’ll be okay though. Don’t worry too much. Don’t worry about being bossy or anything either. I really appreciate the concern and the care. It means a lot to me.
Good point about the liquor cabinet. I have only really been sipping though. And we are out of Tyrkisk Peber, the one thing that I quite like. So no alkyhol for me now. The thing I wrote about not being able to stop drinking, that was about juice and water and soda and lemonade and milk and.. it’s an odd drinking problem to have.
It’s normal that the meds don’t work right away. That’s why we decided to wait another 2 weeks to see if there would be a change. When I first started taking meds it took a while before they worked too. I think I tell my doc most of whats’ going on really.
Clare – the good kind too.