What a year, huh?
Lemon, it’s April.

26/4 2020
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Today will be a good day. Happy Mio Monday everyone.

27/4 2020
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Should have worn tin foil hats, maybethe 5Gs wouldn’t have gotten to us
27/4 2020
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Okay, I’m shutting down the machines now. Going to go to bed, for a long time. Either to sleep long and dream. Or to toss and turn and feel horrible. Spin the wheel, tound and round it goes. One Like = one sheep counted.
27/4 2020
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Today will be a good day. HappY Yogi Day everyone.

28/4 2020
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How’s it doing?
Not great. No change last night, in regards to sleeping. I wake up pretty much once per hour. And it’s very much affecting my mental health. My back feels like it’s getting better, but my mind is stressed and depressed.
It’s so weird. I feel like there’s some broken link in my system. Someone cut a wire somewhere. I don’t know. I’m sure the people out there who are used to suffering from sleep disorders are rolling their eyes. I’m just not used to it. I’m used to sleep being my refuge, my escape from reality. I’m used to it being so easy. I feel like.. a world class sportsball player who’s rich and famous and setting records and then one day he breaks his leg and in an instant it’s all over, everything changed. Well, at least my lack of sleep hasn’t affected my ability to come up with excellent metaphors, am I right.
I don’t know. It just feels so weird, the way I wake up once an hour like on a schedule almost. I could understand if me being less active because of my injuries would lead me to be less tired and sleep less. But that’s not how this feels. And I don’t feel like I wake up from some pain. And even though I have in the past suffered from some breathing problems at night because my noses get clogged (probably due to overweight) it doesn’t feel like that either. It feels like nothing I have ever felt before and it’s weird and I don’t like it.
Well, we’ll see. I’m going to try to go goating tomorrow if I feel up to it. Maybe that will tire me out enough to make me sleep through. But I felt plenty, plentee, tired when I went to bed yesterday, so I don’t really have hope or that. Maybe another day off the extra supplements will help, if it had something to do with that. I don’t have much hope for that either.
We’ll see we’ll see we’ll see we’ll see. I’m just so tired. Of this world.
Hope you all are doing okay out there. Is there still a pandemic? I can’t keep up with a broken body a broken mind a broken world.
Looking forward to some goat therapy tho
28/4 2020
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Way behind on the goatlogs. Here’s one from all the way back in March. Back when I was allowed to take the goats out of the pen and when I allowed Nuller to stand on my back. Good times.

28/4 2020
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In case I haven’t said it recwently, I am very thankful you are here.
As in, generally existing, but also part of my life. it makes a difference.
28/4 2020
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I’m sure the little terrorist is planning his next attack.

28/4 2020
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Today will be a good day. Happy Hump Day everyone.

29/4 2020
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Good goat times today. Made it out. So good for the heart and soul to be with the goaties. Not sure how good it will be for my body. I did the long walk there and back. And Nuller managed to jump on my back. Darn it. It amused the kindergarteners who were visiting at the fence. But it’s not so good. And also Mia escaped from the pen twice, and Sky with her one of the times. She was scratching herself against the gate and it swung open, because I hadn’t secured it properly. Darn it. So I’m a little worried that I have taxed my body too hard. The walk home was rough. I had to stop a couple of tiems. Sitting down on a bus stop bench to catch my breath and correct my back. Definitely sore right now. And i’m pretty sure I’ll be sore tomorrow. I just hope I haven’t damaged anything. I don’t want to wake up to blinding pain again…
But hey, I have tired myself out. So that’s something. It’s a hard life being a scruffy looking goat herder.
29/4 2020
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The gatekeeper and the keymaster.

29/4 2020
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Menace 2 Society.
Well, to my back anyway.

29/4 2020
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Okay. I am going to bed. Cross your fingers and sacrifice a tofu santa to the northern wind for me. I am tired and exhausted, so you’d think I’d sleep well. But I was really tired before last sleeptime too and that didn’t help. It’s getting close to a week without proper sleeping through the night. I could really use a good sleep.
See you on the other side.
29/4 2020
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Nope.
No better.
No sleepthrough.
Fuck.
It’s weird. I fall asleep really easily. There’s no change there. You’d think if I had a sleep disorder or something I’d have a hard time falling asleep. But I’m out in a minute. It’s like there’s some internal alarm clock that only lets me sleep for one hour. Then I wake up. Roll over. And I fall asleep immediately again. I suppose I should be glad that I don’t have to lie awake all night. But it’s not good for my mental health to not be getting more than an hour of uninterrupted sleep.
And i’m still not sure why I wake. It’s not from some immediate jabbing pain. I used nasal spray last night just in case it was a breathing problem with my nose, but that made no change. I can’t reall figure out what is going on..
well, I still have some things I want to try. Some of the advice you nice folks have given me, and other stuff. So we’ll see.
My body is really sore and achey from yesterday’s goating. But not the blinding pain. It feels more like ‘normal’ pain. I’ve never had a problem sleeping with a bad back or sore legs. Or bruised ribs. Or whatever. Whyich is why this feels so weird and frustrating. And my mental state is depressed. I just don’t want to fall back into constnat suicidal thoughts like earlier in the year. It’s been a shitty year, man.
Sorry for all the whining. I know many people are much worse off. But this is my outlet, so. You can always skip to the goat pics!
Thank you all for being there. And there. And there’s someone over there. Thank you!
30/4 2020
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Think Sassy thoughts.

30/4 2020
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We still have horses btw

1/5 2020
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You kids are on the tiktok and playing animal crossing and fresh prince reunion on snapchat and zoom meetings and whatnot. Meanwhile I’m looking up how to download the complete series of Night Court. I’ll stay in the past until you drag me out of it kicking screaming.
1/5 2020
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Mads from 2007.

1/5 2020
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and dance like chevaliers

1/5 2020
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Happy 1st of May, as per tradition nsfw

1/5 2020
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Today will be a good day. Here’s grandma with Bruce and Clark from 2014.

2/5 2020
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Danish men and their pizza, am i rite

2/5 2020
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Ohh no. Rest in peace Sam Lloyd. Way too young, and apparently just had a kid? That’s so sad. He was one of my favourite things about Scrubs. And I’ve been thinking about Scrubs lately because Zach and Donald have been doing a rewatch podcast, and I was so hoping they’d get Sam on there for one of the episode. Bummer man.
I think he was having some bad health problems, and I do believe I even contributed to his gofundme campaign a year or two ago because he was in bad shape and couldn’t afford treatment.
Fuck it. He was even great in that one scene in that one episode he was on Seinfeld.
2/5 2020
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2/5 2020
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Five years gone. Thank you, Angeline, for reminding me. Most of the dates disappear in the haze of my foggy mind. But I’ll never forget Kamel. The sweetest old goat.
A HREF=”https://www.facebook.com/CutestGoatEver/posts/1371188386269929/”>link: Kamelcopter video
2/5 2020
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Pro tip: If you’re forwarding facebook messages with articles that purport to reveal secrets that the ‘lamestream media’ don’t want you to know, you’re part of the problem.
Never ever forward a message that ends with an ALL CAPS plea to forward it to everyone you know. Newsflash: That guy you know on Facebook isn’t smarter than the establishment.
Also, sorry if it offends you, but if you literally believe in the bible then don’t fucking try to talk science. Don’t tell me how the corona virus started if you also believe god literally flooded the world or sent a plague of locusts or whatever.
Also, I know I haven’t ranted much lately, because i’ve been busy whining, but let me just reassure you that I still think Donald Trump is a sack of shit in a shirt and if you think Trump is a good person or a role model for how we should be act then you’re a nutcase, thanks.
I’m tired of this shitty world.
Just do it, Teddy. One step.
2/5 2020
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday everyone.

3/5 2020
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You’re somebody if somebody loves you

3/5 2020
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That’s all for now.

Today will be a good day. Happy Mio Monday everyone.

20/4 2020
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How I’m doing?
Reasonably well. When I think how last week I couldn’t move without blinding pain. The doomsdaysayer in me was proclaiming how I’d never be okay again, that I was irreversibly broken. Show’s what I know.
Well, I’m still not sure I won’t have lasting problems. But I’m glad for the improvements.
I am verrily missing goat time now though. I’m not sure the last time I went this long with this little goat time. First the ribs then the back. I was toying with the idea of going today, but ‘funnily’ enough the fact that I’m feeling better has made me decide to wait just a little. When I thought that oh I would never be okay then I figured I should just go as soon as I could possibly drag my hurting body out the door. But now that I actually feel like I’m healing.. I feel like giving my body the chance to heal as much as possible would be smart. I’m a little afraid of going out goating and then waking the next day with blinding pain again…
I will probably wait 2-3 days. A little extra healing. And then going. I hope the goats are okay. And that they haven’t forgotten me. I bet they haven’t forgottne my bag of treats.
What a year it’s been. Starting off with some of the worst depression in a long time, then allergy testing then rib injury then back injury. Meanwhile the world in the grips of pandemic and uprecendted happenings in Denmark and everywhere else.
Horrible news out of Canada just now too.
This world.. I really need my goat time soon.
20/4 2020
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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi Day everyone.

21/4 2020
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How’s I’m’s doing’s?
Not too bad. I went out and did a little shopping. The two previous times I did that I couldn’t walk around with feeling a bit of jabbing pain in my lower back. I didn’t feel that pain today. I don’t know if it’s because I stretched better beforehand. Or if i have healed some more. But hey, any improvement is welcome. My back is sore, but no sharp pain. Some movements still cause a little pain, but it’s much more manageable.
Another couple of days rest and then i’ll go see the goats. My dad is going to come help me get a bus ticket so I don’t have to do the whole 2 hour walk. The weather is glorious right now. I just want to sit on the bench in the sun with the goats, tra la.
Hope you’re all doing fine out there. Once again, thank you all for the support. It’s been a forked time, but I know everyone is dealing *flails arms*. Stay strong, fight the powe, turn off the lgihts when you leave the room.
21/4 2020
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Sorry can’t talk, watching Matt Foley motivational speaker
21/4 2020
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I love that position Sassy is sitting in, with her hooves out front.

21/4 2020
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Today will be a good day. Happy Hump Day everyone.

22/4 2020
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Happy Earth Day.
It’s a good thing Earth isn’t trying to kill off the infection that is destroying it…

22/4 2020
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Good goat times today. Yes, I made it out. So good to be back. Seeing the goaties rushing towards me. My brain and heart feels a lot better.
How is my back feeling? A little sore, but otherwise okay. The big question is how it will feel tomorrow. When the injury happened I felt fine on the goat day too, it was the next morning that I couldn’t move without blinding pain. So. Slightly nervous about tomorrow. But we’ll see.
It wen okay. One little mishap. Nuller managed to jump up on my back. Dammit. Can’t keep that kid down. Let’s hope it won’t have any bad consequences..
My dad came and helped me get a bus ticket. I walked home. Hopefully that was an okay balance. I hope I haven’t overdone diddly did it.
Beautiful, sunny day. Warm and summery, 20C/70F. That’s legit summer for Denmark. I remembered to bring a drinking bottle to stay hydrated. I don’t know if dehydration had anything to do after all with what happened last time, but better safe than sorry.
I stayed about a couple of hours I think. I really wnated to just stay longer. Sitting with Mia next to me on the bench in the sun. Perfect bliss. But I thought I’d better limit myself.
So hey we’ll see. Just so happy to see my goat pals again. Let’s hope we can have a good summer.
23/4 2020
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Finally, back where I belong. Good for the heart, mind and soul. Let’s hope I don’t wake up tomorrow with blinding pain in the body again.

23/4 2020
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Mia at the gate. Sigh. She still doesn’t quite understand how come I’m not letting them out in the morning. I wish we could start going out again soon.
On a funnier note, a couple of kids came to the fence to look at the goats and they were asking me questions. Questions like “How come you’re in the goat pen? And aren’t you afraid the goats are going to eat you?”. I’ll take my chances amongst goats over humans any day.

23/4 2020
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Oh, and if you’re having trouble keeping track of my goat pals, here’s a video where I introduce them all (yes, I can talk. It happens. Rarely).
Nuller and Lily. Milo and Sky. Mia. And Sassy.
From the last time I was goating, which was also a beautiful, sunny day.
23/4 2020
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Alright, I’m going to shut it down for today. Feeling fairly okay. Big question is, how will I feel in the moninr? Still improving or back in pain? Tune in tomorrow for further adventures of That Guy Whose Always Something Wrong With.
SMwah
23/4 2020
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Peanut from 2015.

24/4 2020
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How is I’m doing?
Okay. My back and legs are a bit sore. But the important thing is. I did not wake up with blinding pain every time I move. So that, that’s good. I was a little worried.
Hopefully this means I’m on the road to recovery. And that I can get back to normal, regular goating. I have to be careful about my back of course, ease into it. But when you consider that two weeks ago I had myslf convinced that I’d never be able to move without pain again, this is.. better.
Thank you all for the support and advice along the way. You’re simply the best, better than all the rest.
24/4 2020
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Healthcare blues

24/4 2020
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Popcorn from 2015.

25/4 2020
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I’m pretty sure injecting yourself with midichlorians cures the coroner
25/4 2020
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Don’t ever stay away that long again

25/4 2020
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Sky is ready for her closeup. Milo’s waiting his turn.

25/4 2020
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday everyone.

26/4 2020
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How are I’m doing today?
Not great, actually. Physically pretty good. My back is still sore and aching, but not so bad But.. there’s always something. I have not been sleeping well the last 4-5 days. If you know me, you know that I love to sleep and dream. Sometimes I’ll stay in bed for 24 hours and just sleep and dream and I love it. But the last few days I have had a hard time sleeping through. I wake up every hour or every other hour. For dreaming that’s actually pretty good, because when you wake up in the middle of a dream it’s always super clear and vivid. But it’s not healthy to only sleep an our or two straight. And I can feel it. Mentally. I am tired and stressed and depressed and just not feeling good. It affects my eyes too. My eyesight gets worse when I haven’t slept enough. And it’s not good right now. I just feel like shit, honestly.
I’m not sure what the cause is. I have been used to effortlessly sleeping. Is it connected to my back injury? You’d think so maybe. But then, when I was in blinding pain a few weeks ago. I still slept fine. In fact I probably made the injury worse because I took a couple of complete days where I just stayed in bed and slept. I slept through fin then. Now my back is better than it was then, so is it the cause? I don’t wake up feeling pain. I don’t feel like I’m being jolted out of sleep by some pain. I just.. wake up, and I loo at the clock and it’s an hour later. My theory has been that maybe it’s because I’ve been taking a ton of supplements lately. Upped dosages of stuff I’d been taking already and added new things. Stuff that’s supposed to be good for the back, or the body in genearl. The bones. So maybe some of that has affected my sleep. I stopped taking most of it yesterday, it didn’t seem to really help my sleep last night but maybe it needs more time to leave my system. I can only hope so. I feel like I’m going insane. I remember when I was doing some reading about lucid dreaming, I read some stuff about how lack of sleep affects the brain. It’s like torture. It’s not good.
Maybe the fact that I have been less physically active because of the injury could have something to do with it too. I was planning to do a little work on the exercise bike today. But then again I got up feeling so bad and tired and unmotivated. So I didn’t. But maybe it would help to get going more on that. And more goating. I need to be careful about my back too, though. Right now I’m kinda planning to do one goat trip next week and then get started on the exercise bike the otehr days, work up some form.
I guess I’ll see how it goes.
The lack of sleep is probably one of the reasons why I have been feeling severaly depressed the last few days. Everything is just so.. shitty. The whole world is just falling to pieces. And I’m falling to pieces. Constantly hurting something somewhere. And even without injuries I’m still just.. like a failed experiment. Incapable of being a human. A fat, blind blob that can’t be around people. I feel like I should be chained up in the basement of a mad scientist’s laboratory. I can’t make it in the real world, I don’t beling there. There’s no point in me being here, I will never feel okay. Even if the curent stuff passes it’s just a downward spiral into blindness and weakness. Sigh. I really just wish I could go to sleep and not wake up.
don’t worry, this isn’t a cry for help. Just expresseing the feelings to get them out of my head. Sorry I’m such a drag. I hope the goat photos somewhat make up for all the boring, self indulgent shite. I am thankful for those of you who stick around. And if you read through all this, I am sorry. So sorry. Maybe I should try reading my own posts at bedtime, that oughta send me into a coma.
26/4 2020
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Think goat thoughts

26/4 2020
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Hey, thanks everyone. For the love and support. I can always count on the faceboxers. I’m feeling a bit better. Still stressed and depressed to a degree. But it was good to get the thoughts out of my head, and feel that I am not alone. You guys are the best.
Oh and also, snl brought back What’s Up With That. I love that sketch. Ooh oui
< 3 ALL
26/4 2020
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That’s all for now.