Today will be a good day. Happy Mio Monday everyone.

11/2 2019
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8:00 am. Now the waiting begins. Sometime between now and 4 pm they will come to check the ventialtion system in my apartment. The annoying thing is they can’t do it in one go. They come and check it and then they leave and come back later to do more. So it’s a fun day of waiting for a guy who’s scared of humans.
I just want them to get it done so I can put on a pot of soup and then go to bed early.
Coughing and sneezing, but feeling okay. Other than the dread of unavoidable human interaction building in the braincells.
11/2 2019
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It done! Phew. It’s always the waiting and worrying that’s the worst. In fact, it only took 2 minutes. Usually when they check the ventilation system, they take away a grill part thing to clean and then they come back later and finish everything up. But this time they didn’t. Which means I don’t have to wait for them to get back. I’m relieved about that. So much nicer when it’s just over in one, quick go. And they were very nice and it was no problem and I know humans aren’t that bad (brb, checking twit… nah nevermind actually).
And now it’s forking soup time.
11/2 2019
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We’re not even halfway through February, Lemon.
I feel like I have lived three 2019s already. By the way, my brother went back in for unscheduled surgery a few days ago. It was something about his stomach that needed to be drained. He’s back home and fine, thankfully nothing wrong with the kidney.
All the health and goat stuff, I barely have time to be severely depressed and sick.
11/2 2019
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Here’s some goat content to make up for the whining. Sweet Sky.

11/2 2019
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Sassy gal.

11/2 2019
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Alright. I’m souped. Off to bed. I am snotty and coughy and tired, but feeling okay. No fever or anything. Not sure if I should head out tomorrow or not. Not even sure I’ll make it out of bed in the morning, since I’m pretty exhausted too. But we’ll see. I’d like to get back to a proper rhythm soon. Goats and exercise and eating healthier. Just gotta make it to spring.
Thanks everyone, for being everyone. I know I’m all over the place and a bag of crisps. I hope the goat content is still worth it.
Now to upload this to the cloud and wait for the profit.
11/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi Day everyone.

12/2 2019
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I was hoping to see the goats yesterday, I was hoping to exercise today. None of that happened. Still got the cold. Coughing, sneezy snotty, tired. It’s not that bad really, I’m just a big baby and not all there. I’m going to go eat the last of the soup (sniffle) and hopefully I’ll be ready for action tomorrow. I’m longing for some kind of normalcy. I am a creature of habit, I need my routine back. There has been pretty much no normalcy this year, with goats and family and sickness.
But anyway, soup’s on.
12/2 2019
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Today I learned: That Stephen Colbert doesn’t know how to pronounce ‘væv’,
Also, if any of you want to buy one of my tissues to get yourself sick to get off work.. send 5 dollars to my paypal. I have so many dirty tissues lying around that it looks like a porno theatre.

12/2 2019
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Desperately seeking goat time

12/2 2019
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I am now the world record holder of most sneezes in a minute ama
12/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Happy Hump Day everyone.

13/2 2019
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I feel a bit broken. I did not make it out, I did not make anything. Went back to bed, moreso because of depression than the cold. Fourteen hours later and the day is gone and I feel like I’m letting everyone down and everything is bad. I had wonderful dreams, but that just makes me want to stay in bed forever even more.
Oh well. Adjusting my anti-depressants now. Maybe I was a little too cocky thinking I could deal with the loss of Mio without help in that department.
Onwards and upwards, i guess.
13/2 2019
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Thank you everyone for the support. I know I can always count on you.
I am feeling tired, even though I slept so much. All so nauseated which is probably either A) to do with the lingering cold 2) because of my med change or W) because the bread I ate earlier was too old. I haven’t been shopping in ages. Right now I feel like I can’t leave the house. Just gotta break that spell I suppose.
Did I tell you about my dreams? They were awesome. I had a Lost dream. We were on the island and.. well, I don’t really remember anymore. Other than the part where Sawyer found a buried sword and jumped off the cliff into the ocean below to escape the people who were holding us prisoner, the Others I guess? It was cool. I want to watch Lost again. Anyway. We’ll see what tomorrow brings.
14/2 2019
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Good goat times today. Oh I needed that. Good to get out of the house, and out of my head. And back to the goat pen. Everyone doing fine and happy. The weather is even a little warmer. I mean, still only around 5C/40F, but at least it’s not freezing.
I took the whole gang out of the pen for the first time today. Had to feel reasonably comfortable with the newbies and their personalities before I tried that. I didn’t want to open the gates and then see them all bolting off into the distance, leaving only dust clouds and an explanation problem. But it was all fine. Everyone did a little grazing. The grass isn’t very good this time of year, but it’s something. Lil Nuller started wandering towards the paved area, away from the others. I had to go pick him up and bring him back. We may have a little explorer on our hands.
We only stayed out for a little while, then back in the pen. The newbies responded to my whistles and everyone came back without problems. Hopefully spring will come soon and things will get green and we can spend more time out there.
Good to be back. Hopefully things will head in the right direction now.
14/2 2019
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What the? Milo?!
So that happened (which is a thing we used to say, look it up, kids). That’s a first. I have briefly considered lifting Nuller up on that platform because he’d look awfully cute there, but I figured nah don’t want to risk him falling and hurting himself. But Milo the daredevil decided to make sure the plate was clean after I had served pumpkin seeds for Mia there. He made the jump like a pro.
14/2 2019
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All goats on deck

14/2 2019
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Tuning out for today. Tired. But it was good to get back to goating. Hopefully it won’t worsen the cold. I think it’s almost gone. Spring is only a couple of weeks away, technically speaking. We’ll get there. Happy Valentines, everyone. Thanks for being there if you are.
14/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Mathilde and baby Vanilje from 2006.

15/2 2019
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Good exercise. The sun was out. First time this year. I mean, for exercise. There has been sunshine previously in 2019, believe it or not.
But it’s good. The apartment lit by the sun, snow pants on, two space heaters blasting at me. Getting into the zone, sweating out the tears and viruses. There’s a long way to go, but I know if I keep going then I’ll at least get some of the way.
15/2 2019
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“If you’re going through hell, keep going”
15/2 2019
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Declaring national emergency to fund a wall that isn’t needed and that you promised Mexico would pay for. Jesus christ, you guys are lucky that I just don’t care right now or there would be a 10 page rant instead of this paragraph. What a forking embarrassment. What a disgrace. What a joke of a criminal administration ok im out
15/2 2019
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Better have some goat content too. Here’s Mia with Milo and Sky. They are closer than ever. It’s funny, I thought Milo and Sky would be more dominant with the newbies. Because they’re on home turf and they have The Giant on their side. Things are going pretty well, but they’re still obviously split in two teams with 3 goats on each. And when there’s a clash and someone runs away to safety… it’s usually Milo or Sky making their escape. I had the funny thought that it’s because the new goats are like street-tough. They grew up in the hard-knock life. While Milo and Sky are chubby upper class goats who grew up being coddled and hand-served treats. So it’s like the Fresh Prince moving to Bel Air and.. wait, it’s nothing like that.
Anyway, I hope in time they will meld into one big group. But there will always be some headbutting. Even Mio and Mia had their clashes after many years together.
And it’s sweet seeing Milo and Sky keeping close to Mia because she’s the boss of it all.

15/2 2019
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It’s a national emergency, my pizza is late! LOCK THEM UP LOCK T
15/2 2019
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Thoughts and prayers for everyone affected by the dire national emergency in America. Je Suis United! Stay strong. The whole world is laughing at you. I mean with you. I mean
15/2 2019
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Please to be accepting baby goat as sign of peace and understanding

15/2 2019
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Hope you’re all enjoying Friday LateNight With Lasse. Don’t forget to support our sponsors and smash that like button and ring that bell and retweet it to your funstergram and bury the body in the back yard.
Remember, you can’t make an omelette without cracking up.
15/2 2019
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Look what mailboxed me! Thank you so much to Florence Vivers and Beverly Fish fior sending me lovely cards. They were to console me over Mio’s passing, but they must have been sent before my latest breakdown so you didn’t even know how welcome they’d be. Thank you for thinking of me. Beverly also sent me a valentine’s card (and I got the cards on valentine’s day, so I didn’t have to wait with opening that one). And also a card for Peter. How sweet! Thank you from our whole family!
And thank you to everyone for being there and listening to me, even when I’m poop posting.

15/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Ping and his ear from 2016.

16/2 2019
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Brokeback Lasse
link: Mia on my back video
16/2 2019
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Bortus is a fine Moclan
16/2 2019
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@djaliplume
I remember the beforetimes. Before the national emergency. When things were simple. *casually stabs zombie in the forehead with a spike as I walk by*. But we can’t live in the past. We have to fight for the future.
.
@djaliplume
*throws lit match on line of gasoline on the ground, gas station behind me explodes and envelopes horde of zombies in flames*. National emergen see yourself out, zombies. *Puts on shades and walks by the camera.*
.
@djaliplume
This account is now a National Emergency Fanfic account, please update your bookmarks accordingly.
16/2 2019
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Humans can be so frustrating and hard to make sense of and deal with. That’s why I have peppered my back yard with buried landmines. Please do not approach my house if you haven’t received a faxed copy of the map.
16/2 2019
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Mia’s looking like ‘what have you got there?!’

16/2 2019
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Tuning out for tonight. Starting to feel a little more myself. As you can tell by the high quality content I have been posting (cough cough). Goat time and exercise time have helped. I think the cold is more or less gone too. A little snotty maybe, but other than that it’s fine. *clashes two zombies’ heads together* say goodnight to the folks.
16/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday everyone.

17/2 2019
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Milo McDreamy

17/2 2019
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Day 2 of the national emergency. I still haven’t resorted to cannibalism, but the mailman can’t keep dodging my lasso for ever.
17/2 2019
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Here’s the big newbie notmama. I have been calling her Sassy in my head, because she was pretty sassy when she arrived and Mia was trying to dominate her. I’ve been calling the lil mamma Lily in my head, I think it was Mary who suggested that. Sassy and Lily has a nice ring to it to me. But I still gotta find out if they actually have actual names by now actually. It’s been too long.

17/2 2019
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no shoes no shirt no’mergency
17/2 2019
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Here’s the lily mama

17/2 2019
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That’s all for now.

Today will be a good day. Happy Mio Monday everyone.

4/2 2019
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I didn’t make it out of bed this morning. Sadness had me in its grip too tight. At least I managed a good exercise session when I did get out. I will have to go goating tomorrow, most definitely. I wish I could fast-foward to spring.
Oh by the way, last news about my brother is that he’s doing well. Still some seeping, but nothing they’re alarmed about. And the kidney is doing good. Hopefulyl we’ll be having that soup together soon.
4/2 2019
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For a while the Danish Weather Institute have displayed a message on their site saying they were working on a new, updated design. Today that design launched. Would you like to guess what my feelings are?
I’ll give you a hint. I have previously complained about how everything gets worse. All websites and programs and operating systems and gadgets and everything. At some point they become pretty good. And then they keep changing and inevitably it gets worse. Less user friendly, less safe, less privacy less I Can Tell What That Is.
I hate change. And I hate modern webdesign. And I hate government institutions that spend fortunes on doing stupid things. Everytime a government system gets updated it leads to massive money costs and unfriendly user experiences and sometimes crippling their departments. I read something about a new IT System in the hospitals, yeah I’m sure that’ll go well.
Grumphley. Okay, done complaining. I’ll go back and see if I can figure out what the weather is going to be like tomorrow. See you in 5 hours.
4/2 2019
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I need a little goat to cheer me up
link: baby goat chewing video
4/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi Day everyone.

5/2 2019
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Good goat times today. I needed that.
Lots of fun. It was a good day for having goats on my back. Milo eagerly did it a couple of times. He’s always happy to do that. Then I wanted to see if I could teach the newbies to do it. But Mia was standing right next to us, so that kinda got in the way. But then.. suddenly somethiing very heavy was pressing me down. Haha. Mia actually jumped up on my back. She was only up there for a second, but wow I did not expect that. We haven’t done that in years, not since those famous videos from the old playground of her standing on my back and eating the leaves from the tree above. She’s considerably heavier now. Couldn’t help laughing, though.
But that’s not all. A little later the little goat boy got up there too. For considerably longer. And I didn’t even have to teach him. Usually I use treats to lure them to do it and then they get the hang of it. But he was happy to just do it for the lols. What a cute, talented boy. I couldn’t even give him a raisin for it, because earlier in the day I suddenly saw my reasing bag being caried across the ground by the wind. Empty. I’m not sure what happened, but I bet Milo pulled it out of my pocket and ate all the raisins without me even noticing. Sheesh.
But the little boy DID get some raisins before that. Yes, he’s started on the treats. Just a little. They get so eager when they get their first taste of treats. And they don’t know the difference between a finger and a raisin at that point, so they get veerry nibbly.
Later still he fell asleep in my lap. Safely tucked into my arms. I love that about goat kids. They run around like silly geese and tire themselves out and then they have to take a nap. He’s such a darling. Not afraid of being picked up at all. I remember Milo and Sky when they were younger, they did like being held and sitting in my lap, but they also liked to play the ‘you can’t catch’ me game when you went to try to pick them up. This lil boy doesn’t even flinch. Dozing off in my lap. I wonder what he dreamt about. Probably raisins.
I did also get pooped on. Not while he was standing on my back haha. But at some point after he was sitting in my lap I found a single goat berry on my pant leg. I should have framed it and sent it to Keiko.
5/2 2019
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Hello, is this the chiropractor emergency hotline? Yes, so funny story..

5/2 2019
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Further nice stuff from today. I got to see Ophelia, for the first time in months I think. I’ve been getting used to going so early in the morning that often I don’t see any people really, other than visitors and the guy who let’s the animals out in the morning. So it was good to see her. And we may have a name for the baby boy. I don’t think it’s official, but Ophelia told me that some kids had been calling him Nuller, and that she thought it fit well. So that may end up being his name. I know it probably does not sound very good to English speaking folks? In Danish a ‘nullermand’ is sort of a piece of fuzzy lint in your pocket. I think. So a nuller could be a little fuzzy thing.
‘Nuller’ also literally means ‘zeroes’ but that’s not what we’d think of when it’s a name. We’ll see if it sticks. It’s time for them to have names already!
5/2 2019
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Getting… sleepy….
Nighty night.

5/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Happy Hump Day everyone.

6/2 2019
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I had an interesting dream last night. Well, interesting to me. Not so much to you guys. I was uconvering old memories. But they weren’t memories of my own life. I think they may have been memories of another dream. Or if you want to get mystical about it, from a past life. Or maybe just nonsense, who knows.
I Was talking to my parents and brother about our chilhdood growing up. And these memories kept coming back. But as I said, not memories from my actual life. But it felt so real, like things I had lived through. I wonder how many lives we live through in our dreams, or otherwise.
6/2 2019
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I love my little Nuller man

6/2 2019
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Everyone, please. I am NOT one of the masked singers. And even if I were, I’d be contractually obligated to not reveal it. So please stop asking.
7/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Bob from 2012.

7/2 2019
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goatlog

7/2 2019
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A little bit of progress. The first weeks I had to go and put hay in 3-4 different places to make sure everyone could eat in relative peace. Now here they are all six of them eating in the goat house. Still split in a left and a right dining section. But it’s something.

7/2 2019
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No, I don’t have an imaginary friend. I’m not some kind of loser.
anyway, I’m much too busy going on hot dates with imaginary women. Whomst are all way out of my league, but I don’t know what to tell you I guess I’m just on a lucky streak.
Sigh.
Wanna play scrabble?
7/2 2019
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I’m done for today. Off to have fun in the imaginary world beyond the veils. To play dream scrabble with Ludo. Place your bets. See you tomorrow, if I find my way out of the labyrinth.

7/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Herman from 2014.

8/2 2019
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I woke up feeling really depressed. Like, emo teen angst sadness. “I just want to fade away” *dramatic sigh*. Eventually I managed to drag myself out of bed. I turned on my phone. There was a message from my dad. “Hey, I wantto come over and drop off some soup, call me back”. It’s as if the soup gods knew I were in need of help.
So soon my fridge will be full of mama’s soup, and I’ll be eating soup all weekend. That certainly improves the outlook of things. Even my inner angsty emo teen loves soup.
8/2 2019
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Look at new girl watching Milo. She’s probably never seen something like that before.

8/2 2019
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Pretty sure if you poked my belly right now, soup would come flying out my ears and nose
9/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Clark and Bruce from 2014.

9/2 2019
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My throat is hurting. You’d think it was a ploy to get soup, but I already have soup.
I’ve been sleeping with the heater on the same level during days and nights, the other night I figured I’d turn down the heater at night because you don’t need a really warm apartment when you’re asleep. Apparently you do. I woke up with a slightly sore throat. Now it’s just hurting. But at least I have soup. So i’ll have some more soup. I’m feeling fine apart from the throat, hopefully it won’t escalate into anything more.
I need to achieve hibernation until spring.
9/2 2019
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Just so it’s not all whining, here is some exclusive behind-the-scenes action for the premium subscribers. Setting up the cam and getting ready to film high quality goat content.
link: goats be hind the scenes videos
9/2 2019
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Quick status: My throat feels a little better. Hopefully that means it’s just a big nothingburger and it’s almost digested.
Had a quick look on twitter and remembered that everyone is the worst and world is not worth saving.
About to change my mind with soup and Rick & Morty.
I’ll report my findings poste haste.
9/2 2019
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How many times can you eat soup in a day before you have a problem?
And by have a problem, I mean run out of soup. That’s the problem. The problem is you have no more soup. That’s what I meant in the first sentence when I talked about having a problem. Please refer to footnote 3-17 if you need further explanation.
9/2 2019
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Stray thought, I miss comics. Good old fashioned printed ones. Do they even still make those? It’s probably all digital now. I can’t read them whether it’s paper or digital anymore. Not in an enjoyable way. But back in the day. I spent so much time in ‘bogshoppen’ looking at old, used comics. Buying them, bringing them home, bringing them back to swap for others. Gold age (I think it was) Superman. Or the bigger comic album. Lucky Luke and Asterix. The Marvel Star Wars comics. Flipping through pages. Calvin & Hobbes. I must stil have the huge complete box laying around somewhere. One of the few comic related things I kept after losing my eyesight. So many memories. I wonder what it’s like to grow up as a kid today. Lots and lots of things are better now. But I don’t envy them. Social media and phones everywhere and everything so rough and yeah, I don’t know if I’d survive as a kid today. And movies to day all suck. i’d take a bad movie from the 90s over anything in the cinemas today. And we did just fine with 1 national tv channel, and then we were spoiled when we got A SECOND channel. And then we got cable and I could suddenly watch The Simpsons and MTV. With teletext, that’s how I met my first girlfriend. Who was also my only girlfriend. And there was snow at christmas and you couldn’t talk on the phone while surfing the net because it was all one cable, which is a thing that connected devices back then doncha know. You get off my lawn, YOU GET OFF MY LAWN RIGHT NOW.
9/2 2019
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Picked up a little Nuller at the goat market

9/2 2019
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I’m heading to the bed.
Not sure how I’m feeling. Throat is better, but not back to normal. I was coughing for a while, but it seems to be gone. A little snotty, maybe? I feel like I could wake up tomorrow feeling completely fine. Or I could wake up sick. We’ll see I guess. Maybe I’ll wake up in a wig and a dress snuggled up to the fullsized academy award statue under the covers. Or in a biohazard suit snuggled up with a lifesized ET doll. You just don’t know.
Place your bets.
9/2 2019
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday everyone.

10/2 2019
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How am I feeling? Not too bad, but not great. My throat was hurting last night, but it’s not bad right now. But not normal. I feel a bit woozy and weak. I think I probably have a mild cold. It so happens that I have people working in my apartment (sometime between 8am and 4pm yay) so I have to stay home anyway. A couple of days of relaxing and eating soup is just what the doctor ordered.
10/2 2019
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Mia and the new lil not-mama. Starting to get along. Better to be goofy together than butting heads.

10/2 2019
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goatlog

10/2 2019
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The human knows its place

10/2 2019
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When you’re watching a youtube video and suddenly you notice the ceiling fan in the background…
#TwinPeaksTrauma
10/2 2019
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Lil guy trying out the bench

10/2 2019
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That’s all for now.