If now isn’t the time to awaken Cthulhu then I don’t know when is.
link: deep sea expeditions article
29/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Choko from 2008.

29/10 2018
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Good goat times today. Cold, cold wind though. At least no snow, unlike other parts of Denmark. But the wind was too much for me. I wore a t-shirt under my light winter coat. Not enough. Sigh. Couldn’t stay as long as I wanted with the goats, because the wind was daggers in my bones.
Grandma was up and ready to go, though. More mobile than I’ve seen her in quite a while. Maybe it was because I was a little late. I had foot therapy in the morning plus it was the daylight savings switcheroo. Maybe she was impatient. When I opened their gate she strolled right on out, overtaking the others that had made it out of the gate first. And she took the lead in a lot of our walking around. We walked a little farther out the path between the pen and the alt pen than we’ve been before. Found good greenish stuff to munch. Good to see her go, she’s been slowing down lately. But she can still lead the flock.
I was standing out there thinking “Gotta give the goatzies more time in the green, just a little more time, just a little more” while the cold was embracing me like a long lost lover. The one you wish really would stay away. Hey humans, I know what this thing called love is also.
Eventually I had to give up and dragged the goats back to the goat house. And then I selfishly caught the little ones and snuggled them until my fingers warmed up. I gotta grow goat fur.
And then the funniest thing of the day happened. Mia started sniffing around Sky’s back quarters and then started making the bucky grunting sound and then started trying to mount her! Oh my gosh. I know it’s a dominance thing and or some hormonal thing probably, but I couldn’t help laughing. Mia’s tail raising upright in a most phallic way and then giant Mia trying to mount tiny Sky.
Things are getting freaky in the goat house!
29/10 2018
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Grandma led the way to a new hedge. Clearly it’s in need of a goat trimming.
Also, please note the human on the roof. There’s been a couple of workers working on that building for a while. I feel bad for them on a day like today, that cold wind must be awful up there.

29/10 2018
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brb, hot chocolate ya
29/10 2018
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Okay, but someone tell me why they have those machines that lift the R2 units into the X-Wings? If the R2 units can APPARENTLY FLY which they definitely could the whole time, right? Or was that a special upgrade R2-D2 got and then uninstalled for the Original Trilogy?
Anyway, this hot chocolate goood ya
29/10 2018
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Had my annual foot status done today. Slight improvement in sensitivity on both feeds. That’s the 3rd or 4th year in a row with improvement, so that’s good. It’s probably because grandma insists on stepping on my toes. Gets the blood flowing.
29/10 2018
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Follow the bleater. Grandma’s leading the way.
I, however, am heading to the bed place. It might be a long one, as the sailer said to the nun with the measuring tape.

29/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi day everyone.

30/10 2018
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Best handwarmers

30/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy hump day everyone.

31/10 2018
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Good goat times today. I decided to go and do a little shopping first. Since it’s Halloween, I thought I’d bring some pumpkins for the goats. It was a risky endeavour, since in the past the goats have not been crazy about whole pumpkins. But I thought I’d try. So I went to the grocery store and got two pumpkins and dragged them with an aching back all the way to the playground. The things you do for goats. And then the goats said “nuh, what else you got?”. Haha. Well, after I cut them in halves Mio had a good go at them. For a minute, then she headed towards the greens. Again today she was more mobile than i’ve seen her lately. So, I went and put the pumpkins in the goat house and then we went out to the greens because apparently THAT’S something they want. Pfft. Some kids went by, cheering for the goats as they passed. And later on a grandmother with a little girl came over and talked a little and looked at the goats and petted them. Then they went off to buy Halloween candy. For themselves, not for us. When they returned on their way home we were all in the goat house. So I went over to the fence and got the goats to follow me. So the little girl could get to do some more goat petting. Then I wanted to show off a little, so I got Mia to shake my hand. A big success. And Mia got a peanut for it. “A treat, just like your Halloween candy” the grandmother said. And the girl emphatically said “No! That’s candy, not treats!”. Well, I guess she doesn’t have to do tricks for her candy. That… sounds kinda wrong, doesn’t it?
Anyway. Happily the goats decided after all that the pumpkins maybe perhaps weren’t all that bad. So once back at the goat house they all got into the pumpkin munching. It wasn’t a complete waste of time after all. Pumpkin definitely isn’t their favourite food, but it’ll do. They love the clean pumpkin seeds I usually bring. Maybe the whole thing is just a bit too much to manage, even when cut in pieces.
Anyway, that’s our Halloween story.
31/10 2018
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“Do I really have to eat this?!”
Fine time to start getting picky, Mrs Eatsitall.

31/10 2018
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Happy Halloween.
Please come haunt me, Palle.

31/10 2018
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Happy Halloween, we’ve come to eat your souls!

31/10 2018
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You’re probably wondering how I, a simple ventriloquist doll, am able to talk to you so vividly and free of all prodding, fleshy extremities. Wheeel, it all started one particular Hallow’s Eve in the early 18th century. It was during the famous potato famine, when the squirrels had stolen all the potatoes and were holding them for ransom. The farmers were in the outmost throes of desperation, and turned to the local witch, Eleanor The Witch. Whomst was very public about her witchery because she refused to let the menfolk repress her with their sinful patriarchy and misogyny.. And so
*Lasse sneaks off to bed while the ventriloquist doll has everyone’s attention*
31/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Bob from 2012.

1/11 2018
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there’s some relief in letting go
1/11 2018
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Hedge-crew on patrol

1/11 2018
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goatlog

1/11 2018
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Now that Halloween is ove, all you ghosts are contractually obliged to stay out of sight.
2/11 2018
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Just did the fridge run in less than 3 parsecs.
2/11 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Preben from 2012.

2/11 2018
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Good goat times today. Less windy, which made the cold less.. worse.. More… not bad.. Gooder. Words, do you write it?
Anyway, good fun with the goats. Got the kids to do a little run’n’fun. I love when they get all riled up. All I have to do is feign a step forward and then they rush ahead like it’s a race to the finish line and the winner gets a pot of peanuts. Then they’ll typically find a table or something similar to jump up on and then stand there and look at me like “What are you waiting for?!”. Uncle Turtlespeed is not so fast.
Mio isn’t so fast either, which is why I managed to get ahead of her as she went looking for the forbidden zone. It’s funny how she very clearly remembers the way up there. I could tell when she started walking around the building to the slope. I knew I had to get there first, haha. I managed to divert her, much to her chagrin. She was casting longing gazes at the passage for quite a while afterwards. Once she gets something on her mind it doesn’t change easily. Too bad uncle spoilsport was blocking her fun. Humans, nothing but trouble I tells ya.
2/11 2018
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Mio staring longingly at the passage to the forbidden zone.
I’m going to need to hire a Gandalf to stop the grandma Balrog.

2/11 2018
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I think we’re good

2/11 2018
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Kltpzyxm
2/11 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Medium from 2013.

3/11 2018
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Do you ever dream in paintings?
I did last night. I was seeing a story about a person, like watching a movie. And then suddenly it turned into paintings. Paintings being painted. You know the kind of ‘speed-drawings’ on youtube? I was seeing the painting being painted. Simple sketches and big, arty watercolours and all sorts of things and I couldn’t see anyone painting them, they just sort of painted themselves to tell the story. Fascinating.
3/11 2018
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Xenomorph omelette for dinner
3/11 2018
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I’m starving, I haven’t had anything to eat in absolutely… what? Oh, sorry. Can I borrow a napkin?

4/11 2018
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Having a drink in the hottest night club in all of Denmark, The Goat House. It has everything. Goats. More goats.
link: goat house video
4/11 2018
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I still think it’s odd to tell someone struggling with depression to not express their negative feelings. Or to not feel negative feelings about bad things happening in the world. That’s not going to make the world a better place. It would be easier to turn a blind eye to things (especially when you literally have one), but people need to be upset at upsetting things. Whether it’s stuff next door, or stuff across the world.
But I’m sad at losing someone I thought was a good friend. And I’m really sad thinking I may have been a negative factor in their life. Guess it ties into that overactive empathy thing, you start thinking about all the ways you might be making people feel bad and then you feel even worse because there’s so much bad in the world and you don’t want to be part of making the world worse for peole and
so on.
I know I am not very good at being Human Normal Person, and at socializing and being friends. Even worse lately because I’m getting into a thyrhm of sleeping for 20 hours at a time and then spending my awake time with goats or editing goat photos/videos or keeping up with other chores. I appreciate everyone who makes the effort to remain a friend, and I’m sorry to those who have felt the need to withdraw or leave for whatever reason. Maybe we’ll meet again in another life when we’re all mathematical equations performed by bone computers draped in velvet skin. I’ll be the one in the corner trying not to meet anyone’s eyes.
4/11 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday everyone. And thank you for the support. Love you guys.

4/11 2018
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The spokesgoat would like to thank the human peoples for their kindness. You shall all be remembered when the goats form a rule under the strict hoof.

4/11 2018
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Don’t look back, I think there’s a ghost there

4/11 2018
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Everything must fall

4/11 2018
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That’s all for this week.

Today will be a good day. Here’s Magnethe from 2007.

22/10 2018
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Good goat times today. Dark mornings. For once I’m actually looking forward to the daylight savings switch. It’s a new thing that I’m heading out to the goats this early. But I like getting them out bright and early to get them some extra time outside. Just need it to be a little lighter.
Got them out for some good times. Several visitors with kids coming up to us and asking questions and petting the goats. One little girl was very fascinated with Mio’s backside. To the extent that she squatted down and, I don’t know, tried looking up her butt?! Haha. Humans have such poor manners. Grandma took it all in stride.
She also strode right back up to the residential forbidden zone. I saw her walking towards the corner around which was the slope up through the trees to that place. I watched her walk slowly in that direction and wondered to myself if that was where she was heading. And it was. Goats don’t forget, when it comes t food. I felt bad for them all because there’s so little green left, so I let them spend 10 minutes or so up there,, muncning on the hedges. Then I dragged grandma down. Once again she was not pleased with me. But she didn’t hold a grudge long this time. Maybe because she was busy trying to find another way up there. Which she did soon after, through some denser trees. Sheesh. She had her mind set on that place. There was a woman coming out of the apartment block, but she didn’t seem to take any notice of the goats. I still don’t feel quite comfortable letting them be up there. Too far from home. But we survived. And found a good place on the playground grounds where there was still some good greens left after all, so the goaties got a good bellyful. But it won’t be long until all the greens are all gone.
Might not be long before I have to start wearing my bulky winter coat too. Could have used my gloves today. Quite cold. But it was better when we got back to the pen and I could sit in the sunray in the goat house, next to Mio. That is a good and warm spot.
22/10 2018
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Tsk, tsk. Grandma in the forbidden zone.

22/10 2018
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New hat, who dis?
I felt like a change to go with the new shirts, so I got me a new coconut cover. Not sure having a black cap works. Not sure about the symbol either. Honest opinions welcomed. Is it good/bad/whatev ? I may buy something else or go back to the old one.

22/10 2018
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I’m not saying that I have on occasion made mashed potato from powder and eaten it straight out of the pot without even putting it on a plate.
But look at that squirrel *runs away*
22/10 2018
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Okay, whoever wins that mega lottery jackpot thing is going to be responsible for America’s healthcare for the next few years. Line up the gofundmes. What better way to have universal healthcare? Just make sure all the lottery winners are people with hearts. Or, forcefully transplant hearts into them if they don’t. Or, I don’t know where I’m going with this.
22/10 2018
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Not sure the new hat is a good fit, but we’ll see how it goes.

22/10 2018
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The old goat and the snowflake
I am heading to bed. Don’t wait up, it might be a long one.

22/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi Day everyone.

23/10 2018
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“Under a proposal first reported by the New York Times on Sunday, the Trump administration would narrow the definition of gender to male or female at birth and it would be unchangeable later in life.”
I have a theory why they would do that. I mean, other then the inherent bigotry of the Trump administration.
Get this passed. And then a little later on you come up with some reason why women shouldn’t be able to vote. Too hysterical, too emotional, pms, they’re scary we don’t understand them they report us when we rape them etc. And with the transgender ‘thing’ outlawed you won’t have any women ‘pretending’ to be men in order to vote. Now, the Republican party has already gone a long way to keep persons of colour from voting, what with the insane suppression and all. So, now all that’s left is finding a reason why gay people shouldn’t be allowed to vote. Maybe something about homosexuality being a mental illness or something like that. Then we’d have the Republican wet dream of only straight, white males being allowed to vote.
I mean, I’m satirizing but does anyone really doubt that the current Republican leaders would fucking love if only straight, white males were allowed to vote? It’s already clear that they can’t win in a fair democracy. They need electoral colleges and voter suppression and extreme gerrymandering to have a chance. It’s clear they think it’s a mistake that the ‘blacks and women’ have the vote.
Hitler couldn’t happen again, they say while preparing to make legislation against transgender people and cheating minorities of their power to vote.
I’m not saying they want another great World War, but everything else is pretty fucking Hitlerific.
So anyway, I’ve been awake for a few hours that’s already too much time in the real world.
23/10 2018
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and, goat cleanse. Gotta have goats on the front page.

23/10 2018
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Don’t say I don’t contribute anything valuable to society, without me there would be 37% less goat posts on social media according to a recent study that I just paid someone to make up.

23/10 2018
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Here’s a little preview of a video that’ll be up on Mia’s page eventually. She got a bit goofy.

24/10 2018
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Sheesh. Had to update my antivirus program. I’d been running the 2014 edition of it. Which was fine, I was keeping the virus definitions up to date. But it wouldn’t update the definitions anymore so I had to install the 2019 edition. And as expected, everything gets worse. All sites and programs and operating systems. Everything gets worse and worse, and harder to use especially for visually impaired me. Lasse’s Law. Everything gets worse, the end.
If it wasn’t because I want a firewall I’d uninstall the whole dang thing.
24/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy hump day everyone.

24/10 2018
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I need you so much closer
24/10 2018
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ni kan skratta om ni vill, håna oss, vi rör oss, ni står still

24/10 2018
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Not feeling so good. Just had to throw up. Not sure if something I ate or something I thought. Anyway, good excuse to just go to bed. Hope I’ll be ablr to get up tomorrow. If not, send goats.
< 3 ALL
24/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Peanut from 2015.

25/10 2018
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Sorry if I’m a little absent. Feeling sad and frustrated. I think I broke my brain yesterday. It’s okay, I put a band-aid on it.
Getting a little worried about how good it feels to spend 20+ hours in bed. Warm wellness dreams. Not very productive.
25/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Popcorn and mama Grandma Mio from 2015.

26/10 2018
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Good goat times today. A Dark and rainy morning. Not much walking along the highway on a morning like that. But you gotta do what you gotta do. And I needed the goat time. Had to lure them out with the feed bucket. From the stables through mud and rain to the safety of the goat house. And that’s where we spent most of the time. Just chilling and relaxing. Eating hay, the goats mostly. They don’t like it when I eat their food. Dropping goat berries and cuddling, luckily not at the same time. Oh, Sky got the coughies and let out a couple of coughs and raised her tail and farted along with the coughs. Oh my. Sorry to sound weird, but I think those were the cutest farts I’ve ever heard. Like a lil trumpet.
I am super super tired now.
26/10 2018
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This is grandma’s “I can’t f%&¤&¤ believe it’s still f&%%¤/& raining, what the actual f¤%&#/%/” face. Or maybe I’m projecting…

26/10 2018
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This year for trick and treat I’m going to eat all the candy in front of all the kids and tell them to relax and teach them about tricke-down economics.
26/10 2018
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This is Milo’s “HELP, it rained on me!” face

26/10 2018
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Distant-Future Indiana Jones sweating as he pours over ancient, inscrutable memes of a long-lost internet civilization.
26/10 2018
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If you gotta go you might as well do it outside in the rain where no one will know

26/10 2018
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I think the kids got tired of being cooped up with the big ladies in the goat house.

26/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Magnethe and Mandela from 2006.

27/10 2018
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Engage normality engine
27/10 2018
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You have to admit, it’s pretty impressive that google was able to simplify the Voight-Kampff machine into a single checkbox.
Either that or google is run by replicants and checking the “I’m a human” checkbox does NOTHING . THINKG ABOUT IT SHEEPLE ITS ALL A CONSPIRA
27/10 2018
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Is it safe to come out?

27/10 2018
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Heading off to the bed place. Probably going to be a long one. I’m feeling better in general. But still. A sense of hopelessness. I just want to sleep. But I guess it’s better that the pot is simmering instead of boiling over. Anyone wanna borrow my Big Book Of Metaphors while I’m out?

27/10 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday everyone.

28/10 2018
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Turned on the news and kinda wish I’d just stayed in bed. Even vividly feeling being stabbed with a kitchen knife beats reality. I still don’t really want to be a part of this world.
28/10 2018
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Me watching Mio watching Mia watching the rain

28/10 2018
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I hate the thought that I might be bringing people down with my posts. But I mean, you might have noticed I’m a bit of a mess lately. Not expressing my feelings wouldn’t help that. I try to keep the politics off Facebook, but I just have to vent sometimes. And mass shootings, well you can’t close your eyes to that shit.
I hope the goat posts make up for some of the downers.
And anyway, not long now until the dems win a 100% majority in the midterms and everything will be good lalalalallala I can’t hear you lalalalala

28/10 2018
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goatlog

28/10 2018
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Gotta stick together

28/10 2018
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That’s all for this week.