The Castle On The Boat On The Moat, With Goats

April 22nd, 2018

Today will be a good day. Mio with Bruce and Clark here. Sweet boys.

16/4 2018

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Good goat times today. Headed out early to a foggy morning. But at least it wasn’t cold. I think winterfeels are finally over. Now gimme that summershine!
Lots of fun with the goatlings. We got out a little further than we’ve been before. Well, just a few steps. But that was enough to discover a castle. Made of old pallets. It had thrones and dungeons and a holy tree on top of a tower, that Mia immediately tried to destroy. I managed to keep her away from it. But they all seemed to enjoy climbing around on it. Of course Mio mainly stayed on the ground floor. You’ll see ita ll when the videos are done eventually. I still have a big backlog, and it has something to tell you hashtag twin peaks.
The littles have picked up the essential goat trick of twisting your body around when you run to gather extra momentum. As you can imagine, it’s sofa king adorable. They don’t run very often (usually they just trundle along like two beachballs with glued on legs) but when they do take off they are so funny.
16/4 2018

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Here’s a bit of the castle. Actually, it might be a ship now that I look at it. Maybe a castle on a boat, in a moat. With goats!

16/4 2018

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Here’s an outtake from our upcoming ad campaign. The big bucks is in sponsored content.
… don’t tell them uncle is a Pepsi Max drinker.

16/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi Day, everyone.

17/4 2018

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Aww, rest your case in peace Harry Anderson. I absolutely loved him to bits on Night Court. He seemed so wondeful. Also when he popped up on Cheers. Just the other day I was thinking how I kinda wanted to withdraw from the real world and just spend all my time watching Night Court and Cheers and Friends and other sitcoms that were my family and friends in the old days.
17/4 2018

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Just a little goat in a big world

17/4 2018

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Just let your light shine, everyone benefits from the brightness.
17/4 2018

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Sometimes I’m appalled at my typing. But then I realise it’s because I’m so super smart and my brain so incredily fast that there’s no way those fat, little fingers can keep up. So really, all my typos is just nature’s way of saying that I’m a very stable … let me rephrase that, a very smart person.
Yeah, works for me. Please do not fact check this.
17/4 2018

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Scenes from the castle on the boat in the moat, with goats.

17/4 2018

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Tomato season is almost back in full force. They’re good enough for the goats, almost for me too.

18/4 2018

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Pet peeve #241: When people being interviewed on TV don’t look straight into the camera, because they’re being filmed from the side but everyone is pretending they’re actually talking to a camera right in front of them. Just look at the forking camera filming you. JUST LOOK AT IT. WE’RE OVER HERE!!
Kinda like when you have a camera crew filming a camera crew filming a scene. If you’re seeing a camera crew filming a guy with a big check knocking on the winner’s door THAT MEANS THERE’S AN EXTRA CAMERA CREW FILMING THE CAMERA CREW YOU’RE SCEEING hashtag monty python lost in the jungle sketch
18/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Happy hump day, guys.

18/4 2018

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A little goat cave for the kids.

18/4 2018

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‘Here we are now, entertain us’ is a great refrain but I don’t think it worked as a voting strategy.
18/4 2018

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Hi. Can you bring the peanuts round to this side?

18/4 2018

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Bought myself a new PC.
A cheap, refurbished one. Maybe I’ll call it… ReFurby. Anyway, I want to do Windows 10 and Linux Mint experiments on it *laughs like a crazy scientist* IT’S AAAALIIIIIVE. At least I hope it is. I haven’t turned it on yet.
So we’ll see how that all goes. Get ready for a couple of months of complaints and lightly obfuscated swearwords.
Don’t get me started on my Yahoo/Oath debacle today. I look forward to seeing the head of Verizon in front of congress in a year or two.
On the plus side, new Eels album! Mmm, that’s the stuff. I have a premonition it’s all gonna be fine. You can kill or be killed, but the sun’s gonna shine. I had a premonition that we’re gonna get by. You and I have a love that never can die. It’s not the weight that you carry, it’s how you carry it. we can get through anything, we can take the hit.
All my other musical heroes are getting assholier and assholier, but E is still the man.
18/4 2018

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Okay, one little Yahoo/Oath tidbit just for fun. Ignoring the whole “We’ll spy on your interactions with your bank” this was my favourite I think: “We’ve also added a class action waiver. These provisions are an important part of our relationship with you”
Oh I’m so glad you’ve added something that prevents us from suing your [obfuscated reference to the lower half of the human anatomy]. And I’m so glad I have to accept that if I want to keep using the email I’ve had for 20 years. What a mutually beneficial truckload of feces you just dumped on my lawn, here do you need some matches or I can go get a lighter for you if that’s better?
18/4 2018

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Sometimes… the captcha just speaks to you.

18/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Heee’res Herman, from 2014.

19/4 2018

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Good goat times today. Can you guess what today was? I’ll give you a hint: Today was bloody gorgeous, that’s what today was. We got past 20C/70F. For Denmark that is legit summer. A summersday in April, and lovely it was. Just two downsides. 1) I don’t have the body for T-shirt weather yet. And B) I should have brought something cold to drink. The walk home was like a Walking Dead dehydration march. Straigh to the fridge to inject Pepsi Max into the veins. Also, the little butterballs are going to have to shed some of thaf fuzz soon. They were shaking from the warmth. Helped to sit in the shade and relax, though. First I took them all out to do some grazing. Perfect in the sunshine. And as I’ve said, it’s so nice that I can take all four out together, no ropes or anything. When I want to take them back in I just pick up Sky and walk back. Then I know Milo will come running and bleating after us, and Mia will follow and eventually grandma will catch up. It’s funny how Sky is a bit like Mio, calm and a little more cautious. While Milo is more like Mia, prone to hysteria and overreaction. He has opinions and demands and he will not, I say WILL NOT, be left behind. He’s so funny.
Some people stopped by in the good weather. One woman came over and said “Oh you’re out having a good time with your goats again, perfect weather for it!”. With my blindness it’s hard for me to recognise people. But she must be one of the daycare people that bring kids by now and then. A couple of kids came over to pet the goats. It’s always funny whne the little human kids are basically the same size as the tiny pygmy goats. If they got down and crawled around on all fours they’d pretty much be identical. Well, apart from the bellies. Rarely any of the human kids are as round as the pygmy littles.
Then it was back to the pen to relax. Grandma sitting in the corner of the goat house, Mia and I sitting next to her. A couple of arm’s lengths away the little ones sitting huddled up. Summers with goats, it’s the do I like to do.
I did get a little productive in between lazing around too. Gathered up some of the hay that’s been spilled and was lying around the pen. In the hopes that we’ll get some grass growing. There isn’t really grass in the horse or goat pen yet, but hopefully it won’t be long. I also gathered some of the sticks lying around, throwing them on the big pile. Mia was looking at me like “Why are you touching my stuff? I had a perfectly good system…”. Yeah, I think her system is the same one I have employed for most of my life. Leave s**t lying around wherever I drop it and it’ll probably turn up again if I need it.
Let’s hope for more days like this. I can neither confirm nor deny the rumours that I stopped off at the supermarket to buy all their iced creams, but let’s just say, I did.
19/4 2018

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A beautiful day in the goat neighbourhood.

19/4 2018

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When you set the self-timer and the goat is like ‘naw’.

19/4 2018

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This is a joke about Jack White and Jack Black and racism but it’s too controversial to type out so instead please enjoy this blank stare and mild judgment. Mission acclompfished!
19/4 2018

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I don’t understand Cardi B. I mean, as a concept.
19/4 2018

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Off to the dreamscape. Hope the sun is shining there too, under the rainbow and inside the fog. See you the morrow.
19/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Have a Fuzzy Friday!

20/4 2018

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I took a little trip to the old playground. It’s been almost 2 years since we left the place. I can’t say it’s looking too good. I think they must have abandoned the plan to rebuild the house that burnt down. There’s a sand pit with some playthings there now. The animal areas are in total disrepair. It’s a little sad when you consider that I spent 10+ years with goats there. But then the magic was always in the goats, not the surroundings. The goats bring the magic wherever they go.
If I ever win the lottery maybe I’ll buy the lot and turn it into a goat museum. Or a pizzeria. OR A BOTH.
I have to go back and see if I can take the playhouse. I forgot to try. I’m pretty sure it’s nailed to the ground, so I probably won’t be able to take it. But I gotta try. It’s the perfect size for fat, little pygmy beach balls.
link: old playground visit video
20/4 2018

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Did I ever thank you all for how great you were while I was offlined? It was so nice the couple of times I got to log on and see people asking and wondering and caring, posting old stuff and talking. That kind of thing means more to me than having a bank account full of cash or a fancy house full of expensive furniture. I am very happy that you are parta of my life, sha la la laaa! And since I am not good at normal human behaviour and emotion, here is a premium behind-the-scenes bonus goat video, because that’s the kind of thing I can do. Love you all, whether we’re on the same page or in the opposite ends of the library. Thank you, and please remember that I am not a time traveller and if I were I certainly wouldn’t admit it on Facebook, so let’s just assume I don’t know the future PS invest in buttcoin.
link: me and goats video

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Today will be a good day. Here’s Mathilde and baby Magnethe from 2005.

21/4 2018

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The magician longs to see the colours of magic descended from pure air

21/4 2018

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I can’t believe they appointed e.coli as the new press secretary.
Hashtag not sure if the onion or not.
21/4 2018

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Fuzzybutts on parade.

21/4 2018

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Can’t eye anymore. Gotta bed. Avenge me. Party.. on… Garth
21/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday, guys.

22/4 2018

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If I could draw I would draw a fork with a smiling face saying “I’m a forkboy” because that’s the kind of finish sentence press post
22/4 2018

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goatlog

22/4 2018

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Isn’t my new computer a beauty? Well, it’s a big, black box that hasn’t been unwrapped yet. But still. Please pardon the mess, still in the process of simplifying. A constant stream of junk being thrown out, yes still somehow there’s always more junk. Goat painting is definitely not junk.

22/4 2018

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Hmmm. Someone sent me… pampers? I guess the invitation to Maury will come later.
stay tuned!

22/4 2018

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Oh, that’s what was in the Pampers package! Big thank you to Gabi Wolff for a wonderful package! Raisins and peanuts for the goats. They will enjoy that for sure! And uncle will enjoy the treats for him and the Star Wars flash drives. Perfect!

22/4 2018

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That thing when you’re feeling a bit down so you buy a 4-pack of mini cakes. Then you eat one and save the rest. Then you decide that you’re going to be superhealthy and you don’t need cakes and you show superiority by throwing out the last 3 cakes. And then the next day you find yourself thinking “boy, I really wish I had cake”.
Story of my life condensed into the pure essence.
But it’s okay, I have carrots.*holds back tears bravely*
22/4 2018

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Oh now you’ve gone too far, uncle mad scientist! Too far by far!

22/4 2018

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Sky is on the pooped deck.

22/4 2018

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another goatlog

22/4 2018

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“AR-15 used today had been seized after that, but IL law enforcement returned it to his father who gave it back to [him]”
? I don’t even. You don’t want the government to take your guns away? Why not, apparently they just give them back with wag of the finger. I mean, the guy was arrested at the white house, wanted to “meet the president”, had multiple firearms. No alarm bells going off? At least he shot up a waffle house not a school, right? Jesus. Why does ANYONE have an AR-15? Why does a parent give it back to their son after he’s been in trouble with the law? Why is a murder more tolerable than a nipple in your movies, why on and on.
22/4 2018

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Deep breath. Let it goat.

22/4 2018

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End of Facebook. Go go goat photos.

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That’s all for this week.


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Back To The Track

April 15th, 2018

Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi Day!

10/4 2018

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I can’t believe I missed April’s Fools day. I’ll have to make a twice as big fool on August 2nd.
Really glad my equipment is still working today, though. THAT’S WHAT I SAID.
10/4 2018

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The heart nose.
Good to be back. I have so much to catch up with, though. I’ll try to get to comments, messages, posts, etc on here and Mia’s page. And all the stuff that’s piled up over the two weeks. I have a file called temp.txt which I made when I got my first computer a million years ago, I thought it would just be a temporary text file that I’d write some stuff in and delete once I was done with it. Every computer since then (and there’s been a few) one of the first things i’ve done is port in the temp.txt and put in on the shortcut bar (which I sometimes had to recreate because Microsoft got rid of it in windows 7 and on). It’s kind of like my version of sticking yellow post-it notes everywhere. When I come up with an idea or a thought or something I need to do then I’ll note it in the temp.txt and forget about it again. There is stuff in there from many years ago that I’ll never even act on, but at least it’s there. So anyway, as you can tell I have missed rambling.
Gotta get working on the simplify project too. Gotta clean up the router/modem corner as one of the first things. Where the plugs and wires are. I also need to eat this pizza. A fat geek’s work is never done. Oh yeah, I also need to lose about 10 pounds to get back down to regular fat geek weight. My mental state wasn’t great the last couple of weeks and that’s very fattening.
I am thankful for the goats, the yous, and all the blessings and privileges I have. Also last night I dreamt I was fighting T.rexes. Pretty forking cool.

10/4 2018

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We now return you to your regularly scheduled goatlog

10/4 2018

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Happy #TongueOutTuesday, also happy Tail Tuesday and happy Feetsday.

10/4 2018

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I hope someone asks Zuckerberg why I can’t change thumbnails on videos anymore. IMPORTANT BEESWAX.
10/4 2018

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I just pity the Cambridge Analytica employee who had to read through all my posts. Data mining must be hard work. “I GET IT, YOU LIKE PIZZA AND GOATS AND PIZZA AND GOATS AND”
10/4 2018

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Hashtag equal pay day? REALLY? Sheesh. Well okay, you can have equal pay. BUT ONLY FOR ONE DAY. Now make me a sandwich and stop hitting me with that broom.
Women these days, we never should have given them the vote. I say I say *twirls moustache*
11/4 2018

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Milo managed to squeeze himself under there. He’s going place, I tellsya

11/4 2018

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[simplifying intensifies]
11/4 2018

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Sleep is for the Weequay
11/4 2018

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Today will be a good daya. Hampy hump day, guys.

11/4 2018

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Don’t quit your daydream
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We all carry our guilt and blame with us
locked and loaded on our hip
I used to be bitter and angry
now I’m sad and hopeful
I used to balance on the edge
now I am flying
11/4 2018

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“Grandma’s not home, she went grocery shopping. If you give me her treats I’ll pass them on to her when she’s back”

11/4 2018

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Necessity… You ARE the mother of invention.
Next on Maury.
11/4 2018

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After all the fun of the internet downage, it is now the turn of great hard drive failuring. And it’s the hard drive with all the goat media, oh noes!
Coincidentally I just bought an 8tb external expansion drive. So I have plenty of space. Just a matter of lots of backupping and moving files and checkdisking and formatting and I just want to go to bed and not see my own shadow for a week or two.
11/4 2018

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That’s all I snorked for today. Off to hunt T.rexes. Oh you didn’t know that Mr T was my ex hold for applause goodnight!
11/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Here’s Mads from 2006.

12/4 2018

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Rest in peace, Mousy. Hope you’ll be meowing hello when I join the great goats in the sky some day. Probably with Nina, from the old playground as well.

link: Mousy post on Mia’s page
12/4 2018

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Heading to bed. See you in.dreams.
12/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Have a Fuzzy Friday, and love the loves you have.

13/4 2018

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Mia’s kissing booth is now open. One peanut per smooch, no refunds.

13/4 2018

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You know how some people consider it a great succes if they succesfully manage to connect a USB cable on the first try? Me, I take it as a big win if I manage to do it on two tries. Normally I try it one side up and fail. Then I try it the other side up, and fail. Then I try it the first way again and I manage to connect it.
And that’s on a good day. On bad days it takes 5 or 6 tries. Five or six tries to do something that has a maximum of two variables. Words, do I type them?
14/4 2018

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I miss Twin Peaks.

14/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Here’s Peanut from ’15, The other day a group of Swedish people were visiting the playground and at the goat fence one said “Oh those goats are so sweet. I grew up on a farm and we had goats too but they were much wilder”. And then the playground employee showing them around said “Well, we once had a really wild one too who would jump all the fences and..” and I just knew she was talking about Peanut. Pretty sure he’s the wildest goat they’ve ever known at this place.

14/4 2018

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War! Never been so much fun. Go to your brother, kill him with your gun. Leave him lying in his uniform, dying in the sun.

14/4 2018

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Eyes on the prize is right

14/4 2018

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goatlog

14/4 2018

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Reorganizing my hard drives. Funtimes. I got old folders full of neverposted things. Like this *waves hand in general direction of video*. Magnethe snacking on my fingers. So much content, so little time.
link: Magnethe video
14/4 2018

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I hate to say this, but I really feel that the Cthulhu hotline needs to hire more operators. They just can’t keep up with demand anymore. What’s the point of the call of Cthulhu if they don’t get back to you?
14/4 2018

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I am heading to bed early. Very. Also hoping for good dreams. Last night I had a Twin Peaks dream. If you know me and Twin Peaks, you should know that BOB is one of the few things that still genuinely terrifies me. And he was being all Killer BOB in the dream. But, there was also sexytimes which is always fun. Not sexy times with the demonspirit Killer BOB. But with someone who shall remain nameless because they are likely reading this RIGHT NOW. It could be you! Check your chocolate bar to see if you got the golden ticket. Anyway, haha. It was actually quite beautiful. It was warm and compassionate and it made me realise that I AM SO LONELY PLEASE SOMEONE HOLD ME FOR THE LOVE O
So anyway. If the dreamboat is a rocking don’t come a knocking. Whoop whoop whoop
14/4 2018

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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday, guys.

15/4 2018

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Look what i got! Actually, I got it almost a couple of weeks ago I think. But all the internet stuff was happening and then I had to catch up with everything and tend to hard drive problems etc. Anyway, I don’t even remember if I’ve talked to anyone about sending me this shirt? Let me know who you are in any case! It’s extremely cool. And it will be even cooler once I lose a little weight. Spoiler alert I have already lost about 5 pounds since this was taken. Hopefully I can keep that trend going. Also spoiler alert: I’m not wearing pants in this picture. I accidentally cropped the bottom half away, though. Sorry about that. I’ll put the full version up on ebay with all proceeds going to the Feed The Goats Or Grandma will Bite Off YouR Fingers foundation.
*backs away into the door Homer-style*
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Thank you Seamus Verde (accidentally typed ‘sean’ and it suggested Sean Hannity mwaha)

15/4 2018

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This is from the package label of the shirt package. I didn’t realise my name change had gone through!

15/4 2018

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I think this is as much of a mountain goat as grandma’s going to get. Gravity is a harsh mistress.

15/4 2018

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mg i gotta stop feeding those goats

15/4 2018

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Mission accomplished! Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! I wish the goblins would come and take you away. I’m going to try cutting the red wire. I tried to think of the most harmless thing, something that could never ever possibly destroy us. Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary. Candyman, Candyman, Candyman, Candyman, Candyman.
Nothing can possiblie go wrong.
15/4 2018

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You’re awfully big for a goat, surely you can spare some of that hay.

15/4 2018

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You’re awfully big for a goat, surely you can spare some of that hay.

15/4 2018

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