Today will be a good day. Go forth and make it so, for as many as possible.
3/7 2017
—
.
Day 3 of Willy Wonka’s pill factory. Nausea seems to have lessened. Maybe because I ate half a banana with the pill. Or maybe because I slept for 14 hours last night. Or maybe because Earth’s rotation is slowly slowing down like the wheel on Wheel of Fortune. You never know. There are some bad news, though. My favourite pizza place was closed all last week, and it’s closed today too which means it’s probably going to be closed all week again. I guess they’re on holiday. There really ought to be a law against that. It’s a good thing I’m hopped up on happy pills or I’d be sad about that.
3/7 2017
—
.
It’s my goal in life to get as relaxed as A38. And find someone to feed me treats.

3/7 2017
—
.
goatlog

3/7 2017
—
.
Maybe it’s a good thing there was no new episode of Twin Peaks this week. If I had watched episode 8 while high on the new meds I might have ended up in the cuckoo’s nest.
3/7 2017
—
.
Diane, what if we are all ants suffering from the delusion that we’re humans? Maybe this is all just a mass psychosis. I don’t know, I think I may be on to something.
3/7 2017
—
.
Meanwhile, in the ant hill:
“Hey guys, what if we’re all humans suffering from the delusion that we’re ants?!”
3/7 2017
—
.
I like to say to myself “Well I’m sure nothing could possibly go wrong” right around the time it looks like things are about to go wrong in the movie or TV show I’m watching.
4/7 2017
—
.
Today will be a good day. Happy the 4th to my American friends. Don’t blow it all up, you maniacs.
4/7 2017
—
.
Good goat times today. Quite lovely and sunny. Pleasantly warm, although I’d like some summer heat. But a fine day to spend with goats. We had lots of visitors today. Probably because it’s summer vacation so all the parents and grandparents can take their kids out early in the day when I’m also typically out with the goats. There was a group arriving just as I got there, I think it was daycare group. They were a bit loud. Making those excited/terrified squeals that some kids expell when seeing the goats. And one kid was very adamant that the goats should know what they were. Poitning at them going “GOATS! GOATS! GOATS!”. Or maybe it was a cheer. Mio stood calmly and let them pet her as much as they wanted. She’s a saint. One of their grownups kept going “No, don’t poke it in the eye. No, don’t stick your finger up its nose. No, don’t pull its horns.”. And Mio just stood there, happily. She’s a perfect petting goat.
The goats were much adored and I got to answer questions, and smile a lot. A woman I see often came by with some kids and said hi. She oftens brings some bread for the horses. And always calls out to me. It’s nice when they remember you, and even know your name.
I’d been feeling quite good, but after a couple of hours I started feeling a bit queasy. Not too bad. But still, I thought I’d better head home just in case it got worse. But then more people arrived! And their kids wanted to feed the goats and it was a whole big thing and too funny to leave. So I stayed a while longer. Worth it.
4/7 2017
—
.
Beautiful day in the goathood

4/7 2017
—
.
I’d post a GIF of my celebrity crush, but I don’t think a pizza with a cutout of Kristen Bell’s face makes for a very interesting animation.
4/7 2017
—
.
It’s funny, this time last year I was nervous when I left the house because I was worried I might run into scary clowns. Now today I’m scared to leave the house because I might run into criminal gangs. So, at least that’s gotten better!
4/7 2017
—
.
Rule #1 of goating. Always know where the camera is.
Mia passed this test with flying colours. Mio will have to try harder next time.

4/7 2017
—
.
Heading to bed. Very tired. But that’s mostly because I stayed up last night. Little bit of nausea still, but it’s not as bad anymore. Generally feeling okay. Haven’t had a real moodswing since I started the new meds, although that’s probably just coincidence since it’s supposed to take a while before it really works. Currently reading The Chris Farley Show, so I’ll probably end up crying anyway. May the rest of the 4th be with you. Goodnight, America wherever you are. And goodnight rest of the world, wherever YOU are.
4/7 2017
—
.
Today will be a good day. Happy hump day, guys.

5/7 2017
—
.
A38 is still out in the field of excellence.

5/7 2017
—
.
Good exercise today. Well, decent at least. First proper one since starting the new meds. I still feel a bit of the nausea, and it gets worse with exercise because I seem to get more sensitive to the smells. Like sweat. And having hot, stale air blown right at me from the space heaters. But alright. I got it done. Maybe the meds will stabilize my moods and I’ll be less dependent on pizza to keep the spirits up. That would be nice. Idea: Pizza with antidepressants as toppings. Patent pending.
5/7 2017
—
.
This is the water and this is the well, actually…
#TwinPeaksplaining
5/7 2017
—
.
goatlog

5/7 2017
—
.
I bet Chris Christie was behind denying the VISA for that Afghan all-girls robotic team. He knew they’d beat his BeachedWhalebot3000 in the big robot competition.
Okay, maybe political satire isn’t my biggest strength.
5/7 2017
—
.
True story, when I read the headline about Hobby Lobby smuggling tablets I thought they were some kind of weird Iraqi brand of iPads or something.
My second thought was that maybe it was a leaked script of a modern reboot of Indiana Jones.
My third thought was that I was hungry and that people probably wouldn’t be interested in my thoughts but that I should post them anyway just in case. I mean you can’t be too careful.
6/7 2017
—
.
“But yes when ur girl leaves u after u spent 100K on her body to get done and then leaves u after have a baby girl who is only a few months”
Robert Kardashian has 7½ million followers on Twitter.
6/7 2017
—
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Today will be a good day. Full steam ahead.
6/7 2017
—
.
Good goat times today. Pleasantly warm and a good deal of sunshine through a thing cloud cover. Quite lovely. Pretty relaxing day too, with the goaties. They were in relax mode already when I got there. And we didn’t have many visitors today. Just a couple of young girls who came over to say hi to the goats. I like when people come by and now Mia and Mio’s names. It shows that they’re part of the place now, not just loaner goats. I overheard one of the girls saying “I’ll never forget Popcorn. The goat that kept jumping over the fences”. Haha. She was talking about Peanut. I have heard someone else talking about Popcorn who was on loan here, so I guess they just had the names mixed up. They must have called Peanut ‘Popcorn’ all the time he was there. Oh well. It’s still nice that he’s remembered. And yeah, it still cracks me up thinking about him being there. Those low fences. He must have spent more time out of the pen than inside it. I wish I’d known how easy it is to get to this playground, I could have visited him and seen him with Yogi. I wonder how they got on. I can imagine who was the boss… Or rather, I can imagine A38 sitting down and relaxing while Peanut was causing all kinds of trouble. What a comedy duo.
6/7 2017
—
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Well, since she couldn’t bring her pet rocks, this will have to do.

6/7 2017
—
.
That thing when the pizza delivery guy says “bon appetit” but you’re expecting him to say “have a nice day” like all the others so you’re already replying “you too”.
Well, at least he didn’t assume I was inviting him in to join me for pizza.
6/7 2017
—
.
Okay, off to bed. I’m still experiencing the nausea on and off. It’s not so bad that I can’t power through it, but I do hope it goes away soon. Before I have the callback with the doc would be nice. Also waiting to hear back from that Nigerian prince. I’m trying to scam him out of money. If you ever get an email from a Danish goat herder, delete it immediately. They’re notorious scammers!
6/7 2017
—
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Today will be a good day. Make the best of it.
7/7 2017
—
.
We got another video featured here. It’s not going to get a 100 million views like that compilation video we were featured in, but still a nice message to share.
link: Palle hug video
7/7 2017
—
.
Showdown in Goat Town.

7/7 2017
—
.
I love when we have kids visiting. The first kid says “YOU ARE CUTE. YOU ARE CUTE”. And Mio patiently being poked and prodded and petted.
link: Mio, Mia and kids
7/7 2017
—
.
I’m not feeling so great. Not sure what it is. Sad? Empty. I don’t know. A little setback I guess. It’ll be fine. Just feels like there’s something off. I feel like my head is having restless legs syndrome.
7/7 2017
—
.
Like a bird with broken wings, trying to learn how to swim
7/7 2017
—
.
Today will be a good day. Come on, come on, come on.
8/7 2017
—
.
Pondering escape

8/7 2017
—
.
Going to bed. Because I want to sleep. Feeling a bit out of it, but no worries. Tomorrow’s another day.
8/7 2017
—
.
Today will be a good day. Happy Funday, guys.

9/7 2017
—
.
Good exercise. Though I’m still feeling a bit queasy and more sensitive to smell and also exercise is hard guys.
9/7 2017
—
.
goatlog

9/7 2017
—
.
Okay, Mia. You win the longest neck competition.

9/7 2017
—
.
I’m not weird
link: lying on Mia and Mio
9/7 2017
—
.
I’m definitely being productive, so that’s good.
9/7 2017
—
.

End of Facebook. Go go goat photos.

That’s all for this week, see you in the next one.

It’s 2:56 am, who wants to join me for a cup of noodles?
26/6 2017
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Today will be a good day. Keep fighting the good fight for us all.
26/6 2017
—
.
Good goat times today. It was quite windy, but we got some sunshine too. Not too bad. And we got a surprise today. We had visitors. From America! Haha. It wasn’t any of you guys, was it? It was a man and a woman. I am so bad with human interaction that I didn’t even manage to get their names. It’s times like these that I wish I was better at humaning so I could have shown them a better time. But oh well. They came up to the fence and asked if I spoke English. When I said yes they asked if I was that guy with the Facebook page. Haha. Yes. So I introduced them to the goats. Pointed to A38 who was sitting and relaxing by the far fence. And Mia and Mio who were closer. Then the woman asked if it was okay to pet the goats. So I went over to them and got Mia and Mio to follow. “I kinda have to since we came all the way from the US” she said. I hope they didn’t come all the way to Denmark to see the goats, because then I’d feel even worse that I couldn’t be a better host. But they got to pet Mia and Mio. And I asked her if she wanted to give them some peanuts. Gave her a handful and she seemed to enjoy feeding the goats. Who enjoyed being fed. So it was pretty cool, even if it was a bit short. And I think this is the first time I’ve met someone from outside of Denmark who’s come to see our goats. I know we’ve had visitors that I’ve missed but who got to spend time with the goats without me.
Anyway, the lesson here is: Everyone is welcome to come visit the goats, just don’t expect me to be great. I barely function as a person, in person. But the goats are great.
26/6 2017
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.
I just got a text message saying that I won’t have to wait long now, my pizza is on teh way.
Which is great, because I am currently eating the pizza. I think there’s been a time loop. The next time you see this pizza it won’t be this pizza.
26/6 2017
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.
A38 chilling by the fence. She’s got her favourite spots that she seeks out and then just relaxes like a goat.

26/6 2017
—
.
So, I’m currently watching the new episode of Twin Peaks. Halfway in. Some notes:
1) I’m definitely, definitely going to have horrible nightmares tonight. Hohhible hohhible nightmaresh.
2) What?
3) No really, what’s going on?
4) I can’t help wondering if I would know what’s going on if I had proper eyesight.
5)
6) Here’s to the atom bomb, may everyone find a way to get on.
Okay, back to watching.
26/6 2017
—
.
Got a light? Okay, I’m going to nightmare town. See you tomorrow, and remember. Don’t snork and drive at the same time.
26/6 2017
—
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Today will be a good day. Be good today.
27/6 2017
—
.
Good goat times today. Sunnier and warmer than yesterday, but still a bit windy. Not a bad summer’s day, though. I had foot therapy in the morning and was up early and feeling a little crummy. But all the better to relax in the sun with the goats. Quiet and uneventful today. In fact it’s been extra quiet. I think the horses have gone on summer holiday. Didn’t see them yesterday or today. I walked by the separate pen to see if they were in there, but I couldn’t see them. It’s a big pen with trees and bushes though, maybe they were hiding in the back. But I remember I’d been told that the horses would go away for some of the summer, so I’m guessing that’s what’s happened. Haven’t been able to ask anyone. So I’m not sure for how long they’ll be gone. Probably a month or two. That’s too bad. It feels kinda empty without them. Literally, two little pufts of white goats sitting in the middle of the big, empty pasture when I got there (with A38 just on the other side of the fence, hiding out). I’ll miss having the horses around, it’s more fun with them to keep the goaties on their toes.
Maybe I should ask if we could get some giraffes. Now that we’re a tourist attraction.
27/6 2017
—
.
It’s good to have goat friends.

27/6 2017
—
.
Guardian of the fields

27/6 2017
—
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Off to dreamland. I’ll leave a trail of pizza crust crumbs so I can find my way back. To the pizzeria.
27/6 2017
—
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Today will be a good day. Happy hump day, guys.

28/6 2017
—
.
I love these so much
link: Keiko drawings
28/6 2017
—
.
Where’s our shared Goat Cinematic Universe?
28/6 2017
—
.
If you’re wondering, no I still haven’t gotten the latest episode of Twin Peaks out of my head. It’s clogging up my head kinda like the last digestions of that pizza that came back into style.
28/6 2017
—
.
No, I don’t know who ate all the ice cream. It must have been the Pizza Ghost. What? You thought the Pizza Ghost only ate pizza? That’s the kind of stereotypes that causes these harrowing ice cream accusatory incidents and frankly the Pizza Ghost and I are both offended and definitely not the same entity. So please stop investigating me.
28/6 2017
—
.
A38 is also outstanding in the field of excellence.

28/6 2017
—
.
A montage of people silently nodding in agreement
28/6 2017
—
.
Someone tell Kristen Bell that she made my video.
link: Facebook love video
29/6 2017
—
.
And now, your moment of zen.
link: camera fall video
29/6 2017
—
.
Today will be a good day. You know the drill.
29/6 2017
—
.
Sorry, can’t talk now. Too busy pretending to be asleep. Why do I feel like someone is watching me…

29/6 2017
—
.
O hai

29/6 2017
—
.
I’m so glad we eliminated cyber bullying.
29/6 2017
—
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Heading to bed early. See you all tomorrow. And don’t forget…. hmmm, can’t remember what I was going to say now. Probably wasn’t important. Somehing about pressing the button every 108 mintues or the world will end. Either that or, don’t forget to water the cabbage. Something like that, no biggie.
29/6 2017
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Today will be a good day. Let’s go.
30/6 2017
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Good goat times today. Not so good weather, though. Cold and rainy. Welcome to summertime in Denmark! Oh well. At least the rain mostly died down when I got to the goats. So we could still have some time outside. I was the first there so I got to confirm my suspicion that the horses have gone on vacation, as it was all empty inside other than the goats. And Mousy the sleepy cat. Hopefully the weather will get better soon, but the goating is always good.
30/6 2017
—
.
When it rains.

30/6 2017
—
–
Mousy. As always, looking like she could use another hour or 5 in bed.

30/6 2017
—
.
These are the pillows and this is the bed. I will sleep full and descend. See you tomorrow.
30/6 2017
—
.
Today will be a good day. The first day in the rest of our lives, no reason not to start being happy now.
1/7 2017
—
.
I managed to sit in front of the computer and contemplate going out to buy ice cream for so long that it’s now too late to get to the store in time. I am patenting this as my new diet. The “Think before you eat” diet. Just make sure to think for so long that the stores close.
1/7 2017
—
.
It’s hard to say no to Mia

1/7 2017
—
.
I’m not gonna lie, Esther the Wonder Pig knowing the names of our three goat ladies makes me a little happy. Kinda like that time Bruce Campbell retweeted the photo of Mia on my back eating leaves.
Also, happy Canada Day to my Canadian friends.
1/7 2017
—
.
So, yesterday I had my appointment with the doctor. To talk about getting me on antidepressants. And it went well, it went exactly as I had hoped really. We talked about how I was feeling and how things were going. And then she prescribed some medication for me. I had been worried she would have insisted on getting me evaluated by someone else, but that wasn’t necessary. Maybe because I’ve been through all that before. She couldn’t see in my journal why I’d stopped taking the antidepressants I was on 10 years ago. And I don’y really remember the reason either. I guess I just sort of did. But I remember they helped me back then. So here’s to hoping they’ll help me now too. Keep the darkness at bay. Stabilize my mood. That would be nice. The medication is also used against anxiety, so maybe it’ll help easy my social phobia a little as well. One can only hope. We’ll see. I have an appointment again in a couple of weeks to talk about how it’s going. I took it for the first time today and I’ve been feeling some tingling sensations (not as pleasant as it sounds) and nausea. I had to stop exercising halfway through because I started feeling bad. But I’m feeling okay right now. Wish I had ice cream, though.
So yeah. You can all expect me to be completely sane from now on. Just boring, middle-of-road, conformist regular human being with no craziness at all. That’s where I’m heading, for sure! Just your average, unremarkable Joe Person. Maybe I’ll stop visiting the goats and become a city stockbroker instead.
Disclaimer: I will work very hard to stay insane and will definitely keep being a scruffy looking goat herder. Just maybe with less haunted nights and less breaking down for no reason.
We’ll see.
By they way, I dreamt about snow in June last night. I sure hope my dreams will stay crazy.
Trying to be open and honest about it, because I’ve known for years I ought to get back on this. Several time in private conversations with some of you nice people you have suggested I look into antidepressants and I’ve replied that I used to be on them and probably ought to try to get back on them, but in my head I was thinking I probably wouldn’t. Because it wasn’t an easy thing, going to the doctor and asking for it. You know me. If I break a rib I don’t go to the doctor, I just wait it out until it’s healed. My head has been a little broken for a long time. I think asking for help is a good thing. I’m glad I took the step, finally.
1/7 2017
—
.
As long as there are goats

2/7 2017
—
.
Today will be a good day. Happy Funday, guys.

2/7 2017
—
.
Nauseated but not depressed, day 2 of the pill buried dough boy.
2/7 2017
—
.
The left side of my face feels different from the right side of my face. And the right side of my face feels different from the left side of my face. And you’ll never believe this but the left side of my face feels different from the right side of my face.
2/7 2017
—
.
Idea: Netflix, but with goat videos.
Since apparently Netflix isn’t taking my calls about putting my goat videos on Netflix.
2/7 2017
—
.
I guess Mia wanted to be in the picture too.

2/7 2017
—
.
“Think I have made a terrible mistake going to college. Have decided to become a shepherd and spend my days tending to flocks of goats. ”
– The Autobiography of F.B.I. Special Agent Dale Cooper: My Life, My Tapes
2/7 2017
—
.
I’m too stoned on antidepressants to rant about Trump. But I mean. You’ve seen the video. You’ve made up your mind. And if you think that video’s no big deal then I’m sure you’d think the same if a Muslim leader posted a similar video of himself beating up someone in a Trump mask. For satire. And stuff.
Okay, a little rant. Anyway, the left and right side of my face are currently discussing how to make my face great again.
2/7 2017
—
.
We know you have treats. You always have treats. Must we play these charades every time?!

2/7 2017
—
.
Heading off to bed. Still feeling a bit crummy. Physically. Wondering if I should stay home tomorrow. I’m a little worried that I’ll take my meds and head off and then when I’m all the way at the goat place I’ll get queasy and tired and fall over and be abducted by a gang. Maybe a couple of days off while adjusting to the new meds would be a good idea. On the other hand goats. So probably goats. Anyway, see you all tomorrow. *click*
2/7 2017
—
.
End of Facebook. Go go goat photos.

That’s all for this week, see you in the next one.