Wainscotting
My head is hurting. And my internet is dropping in and out. I will be brave and try to get an update written though. Because there are startling news in the kitten case.
An unforeseen development. It seems the little grey kitten is not Luna. It is Lana, Luna’s evil twin! No no. Not twin, and certainly not evil. But it is starting to sound a little like a soap opera storyline, isn’t it? Desiree is saying that the “new” kitten (I love the name Lana by the way, Desiree) is most likely Luna’s half sister. Aslan being the father of both of them, the neighbour’s cat being the mother of Lana. At least that’s how I understand it. My head is really throbbing, I might be getting the details wrong. It’s a long and complicated soap opera story. Seems the neighbour’s cat has been driven out of her house by a dog and is roaming around. And is thought to have kept little Lana hidden. But now Lana has come forward. And the fact that Aslan is the father is the reason that she looks so much like Luna. But she’s smaller than Luna, a little younger. I trust Desiree’s judgement that it’s not Luna. Oh my head, my head. So now what? I have been offered Lana, under the same conditions as I was offered Luna. But I must admit that I’m not sure now. On the one hand I feel a sort of obligation. I lost Luna and now her half sister turns up.. and I feel a sort of.. responsibility? for her. Silly, maybe. I have seen a couple of pictures of Lana and she looks almost exactly like Luna. So you know what that means. She’s frigging gorgeous and so very cute. And the whole connection is deep and moving, Lana, Luna, Desiree and her mother and family and so on. It’d certainly be a good story to tell when people ask about my cat!
But there are also doubts. One is that I have read that kittens who are seperated from their mother can have behavioral problems leading to heartache and vet bills. I was concerned about that. But from Desiree’s mail it sounds like Lana has a loving home with much human contact and cat visitors. So maybe that’s not a concern really. I guess it’s more of an emotional thing. Although I’m trying not to think of it, the Luna business has weighed heavily on my heart. And I’m scared now. Of accepting another kitten under these circumstances. It would be a lot safer to get a cat from a shelter, as I originally planned. Easier, safer. Less insecurity. That would also allow me to do it when I’m good and ready. Right now I’m not sure. After what happened with Luna I’m not sure I’m ready to get a cat yet. But then maybe I will by the time Lana is ready to go to me. That would be the second or third week of November. That’s still quite some time to get used to the idea, again. I was sort of planning to wait to the beginning of next year. Give me that time to get over what happened. Will Lana remind me too much of Luna, bring up that pain? Or will she bring up positive feelings that will help me move on and be happy with my lovely kitten? I’m sure I would be happy. I can’t imagine not being.
I don’t know. I’m just rambling now. I’m going to take a few days to think about it all. If any of you have comments, suggestions, thoughts… please feel free to share.
Quoth Desiree “A strange tale, but a very cute tail”.
My head, my heart, my head, my heart.
Okay. A little about my week so far now. Yesterday was visitations. It went well again. Mojtaba is a real nice guy. It still scares me, having to spend time with another person. But it’s nice too. We took another walk around the neighbourhood. Talked about this and that. Sometimes I will feel the pressure to say something and I’ll start getting those negative phobic thoughts. But then I remind myself that I have a good excuse. I have social phobia. There’s no reason to feel bad about not saying much. That’s my thing. That’s the whole point why he comes to visit me. Thinking like that makes me feel a little less pressure. Accepting that this is the way I am. I still think I’m doing pretty well actually. You’d be suprised how much I end up saying. By my standards.
Today I went to TMU. Got my rewards for the website constructing. Ka-ching! It’s nice going out there now. I feel sort of like a student that has graduated and is coming back to his old school. It’s quite a different feeling from when you’re actually enrolled and you go there every day and work “under” the people. Now you’re more like a friendly visitor. I wouldn’t say an “equal”, but yeah, it’s a nice feeling. Probably because everyone is so nice. Smiling and saying hello and thanking me for the help with the site and asking how things are going and so on. It’s a great place. Tilværelse Med Udsigt. If you happen to have come here googling for that place then let me just say that I give it my full recommendation. The nicest people you’ll meet and very competent in what they do as well.
I remember how scared I was on my first day there. Things went pretty well, right until we had to start doing those “introductory games” where you get to learn each other’s names and such. I just couldn’t do it. So I went to Peter’s office. The boss. And told him so. And there wasn’t a second’s hesitation or judgment or anything. Just understanding and acceptance. They knew about my problems and they weren’t going to force me to do anything that was too hard for me. That wasn’t their way of working. And that helped me a lot, knowing that from the start. That helped make me feel safe and hopeful about the whole thing. Not that it was all easy. Just showing up in a place full of people, that was and is hard for me. But right from the start I felt I could do as much as I was able to and not be judged for what I wasn’t able to do. That made a big difference from other places where it was always such a struggle, where I always felt like I was expected to do better even though I was doing as much, or more, than what I felt I was capable of. Not that the other places I’ve been were bad. But the understanding I felt I got at TMU just made all the difference.
Aanyway. There I went rambling again. I didn’t mean to make this a “praise the TMU halleluja” testimonial. But I think you get how I feel.
I went to see the goats after I was done at TMU. It just so happens that the bus I take to and fro TMU stops at a couple of hazel trees. There’s always a ton of dropped nuts there. So I filled up a bag. And consequently was very popular with the goats! There were also some boys there, one of them was the kid I “saved” from drowning. He remembered it too. “Remember how I almost drowned?”. Yup. I doubt he would have drowned. But hey, if the kids want to worship me as some kind of superhero then why not? One day I will grow wings and fly, I swear. But it’s always fun to help them get close to the goats. They’re less scared when they see someone like me who just walks into the pen and sits down and laughs when the goats start to chew on him.
So, tomorrow I’m going to take it easy and relax. Chillax. Do some cleaning, probably. Because on Thursday the super is coming to go over the list of grievances. I can’t wait to get that over with. It scares me, and it’s been lurking in the back of my head ever since I moved in. The biggest grievances on the list are the worn down floors and the splotches on the walls. But those are also the ones that would be really inconvenient to get fixed. Fixing the floors would mean breaking them up completely. I’d have to move out for a while. I’m not sure how long it would take to paint a little place like this? I probably wouldn’t have to move out for that. But even so, having painters come in and all that, it would be a big bother for me. I don’t care about these things getting fixed, I’d rather avoid the inconvenience. Even though I know painters are very nice people!
The rest of the grievances are things like lose panels, a lose electrical plug, some hooks in the walls. And holes from screws. There’s a burn mark on a floor board. Scratches here and there. Little things that don’t actually need fixing or that I just don’t care about. They just have to be noted down so I don’t get blamed for them in the future.
Is “super” the right word for that guy person? In Danish his title is “varmemester” which translates directly to heatmaster. But that sounds like someone out of the X-Men. Judging from wikipedia super is indeed the correct word. Good job, Plume. Although it makes me think of supernintendo Chalmers.
This has gone on for far too long, my head is about to explode. Or implode. What’s the one where it’s really loud and messy?
October 10th, 2007 at 4:27
Yup, super is the right word or landlord would work, too. And I’m glad to see you realize painters are really, really nice people. hee, hee.
Oh, my. You really do have a kitty kat soap opera going on. Image Luna having a half-sister, Lana. What to do, what to do? Take your time and think it over, I know you’ll make the right decision for yourself.
So what if you don’t talk a mile a minute . . . there never has been enough listeners in the world anyhow. That’s your job to be a good listener and what a good one you are!
If you hadn’t been listening, you might not have heard the boy you rescued from drowning. You may not think you saved him from drowning, but he sure thinks you did. Maybe that has been one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for him. He must think about it quite a bit, so you’ll just have to get used to your “hero status” in that boy’s eyes anyway even if you don’t think you deserve it.
Take a deep breath, you’re doing just fine. Keep up the good work. You’ll look back at this time in a few months and wonder what the problem was!
Remember SuperPlume can leap building in a single bound!
October 10th, 2007 at 9:25
Yes, you got it right, Plume. But to assure you, mummy cat has not completely abandoned Lana. She might just come in the dark of the night. Towards the end, the other mummy cat wasn’t with Luna or her brothers much either. So maybe it’s just normal in cat world – teach them some independence and stuff. Lana’s mummy cat ceratinly is around – just keeping a very low profile. Maybe she has bad experiences with dogs from one of her previous lifes. Glad to report, however, that Lana gets on splendidly with the dog – not nursing from it, though, it being a boy and all. But she is a very confident little kitty, that’s for sure.
October 10th, 2007 at 13:26
Oh, and I truly deeply understand your doubts and so forth. But you have some 5-6 weeks to decide either way. I’ll just keep nice and neutral and not try to sway you either way. Merely the odd picture and random update – that’s all;)
October 10th, 2007 at 23:18
Is there a kat quarantine coming from one country to another? I didn’t know how that worked over there?
Some of our mama cats would take their kittens off and leave them when it was time to wean them. Other times the mama kat would take off and leave the kittens!
My Dad had a mama kat who took her kittens off and left them in a field. My Dad told her to bring them back home or NO food for her that night. Mama kat brought the kitties home in time for supper. My Dad is a “Kat Whisperer” I think. Although he told the mama kat in English (not Cat) what he wanted!
Desiree: Don’t want to be nosy, but you mentioned visiting your dad in the hospital. Hope he is alright and not something too seriously wrong.
October 11th, 2007 at 3:00
Maybe it might be a good idea to go with the animal shelter. At least you not getting a kitten that will develope problems and issues later on.
Lots of older kats need a good home and they are already used to being around humans.
I know lots of people who have adopted older kats. Their original owners no longer wanted them. And so far they are very contented and happy. They kats themselves sleep a lot.
And whenever I’m over for a visit, they would come up to me, meow, then wander back to their napping area and ignore for the rest of the visit.
October 11th, 2007 at 13:04
I’ve adopted two adults cats and have had great experiences, but for someone who has never had a cat, missing out on kittenhood seems a little unfortunate. I mean, what could be better/cuter than bonding with a sweet little ball of frizzy kitten fur? Adoring their pointy little kitten tail? Watching it play? HUGGING AND KISSING IT? Nothing. Plume, I have a feeling that once you get your kitty you’ll wonder why you ever had doubts or waited as long! It’s going to be a great thing. You’ll wonder how you ever got by without the love and companionship! Just follow your heart and it’ll all work out.
October 11th, 2007 at 14:25
It’s interesting reading these comments… when I was young we got a kitty who had been found abandoned with other kitties. It was ok while it was tiny, but it really did develop an evil temper as it grew up.
Of course we loved it, foibles and all, but it certainly wasn’t a friendly stroky cuddly cat. It may be worth going for the known quantity of an adult cat.
The shelters that I know will accept the cat back if you find you can’t look after it – check yours. I guess their reasoning is that the cat would have been with them _anyway_, so if you take it even for a short time, then that’s better for them.
Whatever you decide, good luck!
October 11th, 2007 at 19:13
Let me just reiterate – Lana has not been abandoned completely. I think as Debster says (and confirmed by my mum’s best friend who has about 17-20 cats living on the farmt hat they have): mummy cats seem to lose interest once the kittens are a certain age. Because my mum’s neighbour doesn’t know the age of this one but can see she’s about the age Luna was when she was lost, she knows she’s able to feed on solids, but to be on the safe side, she’s giving her kitten milk (in a bowl) as well. Mummy cat does appear from time to time and check on the kitten (maybe she nurses her too, but it’s mainly night visits, and neighbour doesn’t stay up to check on this). She seems to be confident that Lone will take care of her kitten like she has all her other kittens over the years. Lone has about 7 of mummy cats kittens still hanging around – none are indoor cats though. The mummy cat used to be, and is still tame and loves a cuddle. Daddy cat, Aslan, was very much an indoor cat with an equally loving temperament.
Plume, if you chose an adult cat, definitely make it female as adult male cats will mark when introduced to a new home. Also, please note that you cannot be sure that an adult cat isn’t raving mad (-or was once an abandoned kitten) just because you get it from a shelter. Shelters are good, but they don’t always know the story of the pets the have. Our dog Byron is the classic example. Mad and dangerous, he was, but we loved him anyways – as you do. But you can get kittens from shelters too. Then you wouldn’t miss out on kitten-hood, which I, like Corrie, think would be a great shame (-whether it be little Lana or another kitten).
Debster: I might live in the sticks, but it’s nonetheless the same country;) I moved to Denmark with husband, daughter and dog about 8 months ago now, so am in the “neighbourhood.” Hence, there’s no quarantine. And about my dad: Thanks for asking. I didn’t go visit him but my daughter did with her grandma. My dad’s dying. His lungs have collapsed – years of drinking, smoking and generally not doing anything worhtwhile with your life will do that to your health. He’s a little better now – or a little less bad. Is out of the respirator. But he can’t walk or get out of bed even and still has an oxygen mask a lot of the time, and he certainly isn’t expected to live another year or even 6 months. So yeah, I guess it is pretty bad, and I’m in emotional turmoil about the whole thing, but that another and very long soap opera, which I shall not bore you with.
Plume, at the end of the day, I’m sure this all comes down to gut feeling. Like Corrie, I know any cat or kitten you have will be much loved and a fantastic companion. I know you’ll do everything right and that your cat will be absolutely lovely. Lana would be blessed to have you as her human – as would any cat looking for a human.
(Sorry about the looooong post)
October 11th, 2007 at 19:26
Lots of wonderful suggestions and ideas here! At the end of the day, you will have to decide. And we know you’ll make the correct decision.
I was going to write a poem but it was getting too long. After you’ll read it, I’m sure you’ll fly all the way to California, knock on my door, punch me in the jaw, then fly back to Denmark.
**ouch!!**
October 11th, 2007 at 23:04
Thank you all for the advice. You guys are great, as always. And Desiree, never apologise for a long post! The longer the better. And as I’ve said, my thoughts go to you and your family.
October 11th, 2007 at 23:28
Desiree: Thanks for the info. Some how I got it in my mind that the kitten or your Mum’s summer house was in England and the kitty was to go from England to Plume in Denmark. That’s why I asked about a quarantine. Sorry to hear about your Dad. It must be a very difficult time for your family.
Plume: I would visit with a kitty (or adult cat) first. You can tell pretty quickly if they are friendly, curious, alert, likes people, etc. If you have to chase it down, or it hides from you, bites, scratches, or doesn’t want to be picked up, it has some major socializing problems with people.
Kittens like this can be tamed down eventually, but it takes lots of time and patience to do so. I speak from experience in taming wild barn cat babies. I always loved them as much as the other tamer cats, but they were not as quick to show affection to us.
Corrie has a good point about getting a shelter kitten so you can experience kittenhood. But play with them first, see how it acts around you. You may want to go to the shelter several times just to visit. It would be good for the kitties to socialize with you and for you to socialize with them. (Plus something positive to tell your visitation guy: I visited with 24 kittens at the animal shelter!) Our shelters always want visitors to come walk dogs or play with the kittens even if they can’t adopt an animal.
October 12th, 2007 at 23:04
Debster – Yes, if I chose the shelter route then I shall definitely do some visiting first. What a chore, eh? Having to play with kittens. I just wish wish wish that step could be skipped! Heehee.