Today will be a good day. Get yours now, pay later!
10/7 2017
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Good goat times today. Cloudy with a chance of goofballs. The clouds kept the direct sun out but they weren’t enough to make it a dark day, so that was something at least. The day got off to a quite disastrous start. I forgot the treatbag! Oh noooo! I got all flustered in the morning because they turned off the water in my building without warning. I get anxiety when stuff like that happens because it means I might have to deal with people and junk. I don’t like people and junk. So I got so flumoxed that I left the treatbag (two treatbags actually, one with peanuts and one with raisins) on my kitchen table when I left. What a horror. Luckily I remembered the bag with tomatoes and bananas, so I didn’t get lynched by an angry goat mob. I was the first one there so I fed the goats inside. Mio was in a crabby mood and was snorting up a storm at Mia. And poor Mia got the food bucket stuck around her neck and then Mio chasing after her to get in the bucket. Oh dear oh dear. Safely outside it was a pretty lazy day. No visitors at all. The goaties did a lot of grazing. Later on Anne came by. She said she was taking care of the goats, I guess because it’s vacation now. It’s been a while since I saw her last, so that was nice. She brought carrots for the goats. Since there are no horses to eat the carrots right now.
To my amusement I discovered today that the goats are scared of my shoes. I was sitting down with my legs stretched out. And I was sort of flipping my feet back and forth, for no particular reason. And the goats goat all worked up, starting at my shoes. I thought to myself I thought “you can’t be scared of my shoes, guys?!” so I started dragging my feet through the dirt towards them to see, and yeah they both bolted to a safe distance and stared intently at the devil shoes as if thinking “those shoe-shaped mini dinosaurs are getting ready to attack us”. Oh dear, oh dear. Guess I better keep my legs tucked in so those dastardly shoes don’t disturb anyone. It’s funny how they didn’t realise that -I- was the one moving those shoes around.
Mio also got spooked by something else later I think. Suddenly she started bucking around like a horse at a rodeo. It would have been hilarious except I was a little worried something had happend to her. I couldn’t see anything wrong, though. I think a bug must have landed on her and freaked her out. Oh dear, oh dear. Life is fraught with danger round these parts.
10/7 2017
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What do you mean you forgot the treats?!

10/7 2017
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“When did he lose his marbles?”
Gard, I love Albert. Miguel Ferrer was a treasure.
10/7 2017
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This was before they realised that my shoes were the devil’s instruments.

10/7 2017
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I never appear in any of those “who are your 9 naughtiest friends” things.
So, I guess I’ve been covering my tracks pretty well.
10/7 2017
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Look, we can sit here and argue about who has too much time on his hands and whether he’s addicted to pizza or not and whether his name is pronounced Lassie or not, but I think we should just all move on and stop looking at me like that.

10/7 2017
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Today will be a good day.
11/7 2017
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You better have treats.

11/7 2017
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Well, I for one am glad that this whole Russia thing turned out to be fake news.
What could possibly go wrong when you choose to trust someone who is proven to be lying all the time.
11/7 2017
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Hello, I am a high quality person. Please teach me how to shake your hand as a human.
11/7 2017
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Heading to bed. Feeling somewhat better. Not nauseated right now. Maybe I’m now fully adjusted to the new meds and am a high quality person. We can always hope! Now I just need to find a pill that can help me not waste time on stupid things. I’ll go look on twitter.
11/7 2017
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Today will be a good day. Happy hump day, guys.

12/7 2017
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I definitely have no ties to pizza.
12/7 2017
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I know, I know. I heard the news about the giant iceberg from Antarctica too. But I’m not letting that get in the way of the maiden voyage of our glorious Titanic 2.0. I have a good feeling about this!
12/7 2017
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Grazn

12/7 2017
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I always think of you as the one who got away.
Curse these plastic handcuffs, next time I’m getting real ones.
12/7 2017
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Today will be a good day. Snorks up.
13/7 2017
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Good goat times today. Lovely and sunny, although with a harsh wind. Made for a cool morning, but as the sun broke down the thin cloud cover the day got quite warm. I was a little worried about A38 in the morning. She didn’t want to eat her goat pills. But then she did want treats, lots of treats. I guess it’s just like a kid who doesn’t want dinner but just wants the dessert. Also she wanted bananas and tomatoes and was happily munching away when I went and got a lot of branches with fresh leaves for the gang.
I forget how it came up, but talk came to Peanut when Anne arrived later on. She was talking about how he used to escape. “Yeah, surely these fences couldn’t hold him” I asked. “Not even a little bit” she replied. We had taller fences at the old place and that was never enough. I wish I could go see him now. He must be a big, giant goat master. By far the most accomplished goat boy I’ve ever known.
Anne also remarked “if I have to answer whether she’s pregnant ONE more time…” hinting at Mio. Haha. Yup, me too. In fact I had to answer that very question earlier in the day when a visitor came by. It never fails. Almost everyone asks. Thankully only about 50% ask if I’m pregnant.
13/7 2017
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Yogi and the Rock. The perfect buddy comedy.

13/7 2017
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now go back into the dark woods

13/7 2017
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My friend Jim ate all the pizza. Send more pizza.
13/7 2017
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Turning off for today. If you have any questions please forward them to Jim Jimson. Good old Jim-Jim Jimbaree will sort you right out. Ah I love that guy. Sir Jimsalot. The Jimbone quartet. The Jimson Pimpernell. Jim Jimshakalaka. [The Simpsons Theme] The Jiiiimsons [/The Simpsons Theme].
Remind me some day to tell you about some of the adventures I’ve had with Jim. We go way back. We used to sit up all night and watch Candle Cove on the telly. And one time we built a snowman and it came alive and we flew and he sang this pretty song and that gum I like came back in style. Love ya, Jimnaut!
Oh relax, kids. I’ve got a gut feeling that Jim is around here somewhere.
After all isn’t there a little Jim in all of us?
In fact you might even say we just ate Jim and he’s in our stomachs right now!
13/7 2017
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Today will be a good day. Only love for all beings
14/7 2017
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Watch out, A38. You got two great whites on your tail. *Jaws theme*

14/7 2017
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MY FAVOURITE PIZZA PLACE IS BACK. This is not a drill. This is not a drill. They’ve been closed for weeks. *crumbles diet plan into a ball and throws it on the fireplace*
14/7 2017
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goatlog

14/7 2017
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Do not accept a friend request from Kid Rock. You’ll end up suffering the horrible fate of being friends with Kid Rock.
Etc.
14/7 2017
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You guys are going to find out eventually anyway, so in an effort to be completely transparent I’m just going to tell you right now that yes, my friend Jim ‘The Jimshorts’ Jimson WAS in that meeting with Trump Jr and the Russians. But that’s definitely the only ties he has to Russia and I swear my life upon it, unless the biased snowflake media uncovers more in which case note to self delete this post.
Also, in an effort to be completely transparent I’m going to paint myself with this Invisible Paint that I bought from a drifter at the county fair for my life savings. Now… where did I put it. Sharks, how do you find invisible paint? I should have asked him to put it in some kind of container…
15/7 2017
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If you get a friend request from a Jim Jimson, don’t accept it. He’s my friend and I don’t want to share him with anyone.
15/7 2017
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If you get a friend request from Today then go ahead and accept it because it will be a good day.
15/7 2017
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Just a couple of kooks

15/7 2017
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Happy thoughts

15/7 2017
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Off to bed early. I’m amazed I made it this far, I’ve been looking forward to going to bed all day. Not because I’m feeling bad. Just because I want to go to dreamland and sleep. Perfectly normal, right? See you tomorrow, and if you happen to see Jim can you tell him he left his fluffy slippers here? That’s Jim for ya, always forgetting stuf lol!!
(We’re still a couple of days away from the point when the Jim stuff starts getting creepy. But don’t worry. We’ll get there).
15/7 2017
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday, guys.

16/7 2017
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The lady in white

16/7 2017
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Mary Poppins Returns? Eh, call me when Mrs Doubtfire returns.
16/7 2017
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A FEMALE doctor? That’s crazy! Women can’t be doctors! *twiddles handlebar moustache and rides away on one of those bicycles with one giant wheel and one tiny*
16/7 2017
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A38 is old and wise, she knows not to fight gravity.

16/7 2017
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End of Facebook, go go goat photos.

That’s all for this week, see you in the next one.

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