Ugh. I feel sick. Like a fish washed ashore, fighting to catch a breath. That nervous energy in your body, you know like the day before a big test or exam or meeting or whatever. The dread of something big and inescapable coming. I should probably go see the goats today, for one last normal day with them. But I.. can’t. I feel like i’m falling apart. I’m going to fall into bed, and maybe I’ll disappear under the covers.
I’ll do my best on Tuesday. I just want it to be over with. And I just want it not to come. If I could speed up time or slow time or something. I am scared. But I will do my best. Send all the positive energy you can spare for us. Thanks for being there.
15/8 2022
—
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Okay.
The short version first:
I managed to convince the Gellerup people to take Mia, Milo and Sky.
After lots of fuss and trouble we got them moved.
The Gellerup playground is not a shtty little bad place, it seems good. I was so worried that I’d end up ‘saving’ Mia and then condemning her to a tiny little cage where she’d only be out from 1 to 5 and I’d barely be able to go in with her. Not the case. There’s space, I got keys, people seem good.
Today went about as well as I could have hoped. Except when it was time for me to go home. Mia, Milo and Sky were distraught at me leaving. And Mia managed to jump the fence and get out of her new pen. I had to go tell the new playground people “we have a problem”. I was so worried they’d say “well we can’t keep her here then” but hte leader of the new playground, Malene, whomst I’ll have more glowing words about in the long version, just smiled and laughed it off and didn’t seem to think it was a big deal. Hopefully we can get the fence improved. Hopefully when they settle in Mia won’t be desperate to follow me when I go.
Malene even gave me a ride home in her car. Fun fact, the playground I did recon at recently? That wasn’t the correct one. This was a whole other playground. A little further away. Maybe a 20-30 minute walk instead of a 5 minute walk. But soo much bigger and more animal friendly as far as I can tell.
Still lots to do to make everything good. But it looks like Mia, Milo and Sky have a good home that I can visit as I like. But no home yet for the news. Sassy, Nuller and Lily. We need to find them a good home too. The chances of finding a home for them near me are not good. And even if we did I don’t think I have the mental and physical capacity to visit two groups of goats all the time. I think at best we can hope for a place I can occasionally visit to keep tabs on them and give them some loving. Even that is not very likely. Hopefully we can find a place where they can be happy.
Okay, that was the short(ish) version. I couldn’t have asked for things to go better given the bad situation.
Now, for the complete story of today. You can skip it if you don’t want all the gory details.
A tough day. I had been told the pickup would happen at 12 am. So I tried making the most of the time with the goats before that. It wasn’t too long after I got there when it started raining. Somehow, appropriate. I’m not going to be all dramatic and say the heavens wept for us but… The goats seemed quite sombre and tired, and a lot of time was spent sitting in the house and shelter, listening to the rain. Which is not a bad way to spend time, and again it felt kind of appropriate to not be running around laughing. Just a quiet time with goat friends.
Noon rolled around and no one showed up. I started thinking “come on don’t drag my misery out” while also thinking “maybe it’s cancelled, maybe the goats can stay”.
But about half an hour later a group of people came to the fence. Lars, leader of the current playground, Malene, leader of the new. And some others. And then it was time for my big performance.
They weren’t sure how many goats they were going to say. Malene said they only had room for 2, that it would be kind of cruel to take more. That made my heart sink and made me think of that tiny Gellerup playground I visited a decade ago, so small and non animal friendly. She said they had about half the size of the goat house. And I asked, well how much space do you have outside. And she said, oh plenty, more than here. That was a relief. Half the size of the goat house for half the goat family, and then plenty of space outside? That sounded.. okay. So I went into, trying to tell them how great Mia is with visitors. And that was something Malene was looking for, something that could work with kids. And I laid it on thick how great Mia was at that. And neatly avoided talking too much about Milo.
Well, it worked. I was worried this Malene person would be a by-the-books made-my-mind-up-already hardash. But she was sweet and kind and listened to me and said .. okay. She agreed to take Mia, Milo and Sky.
So then the big circus started. Moving goats, more or less against their will, is not easy. I managed to get Mia, Milo and Sky out of the pen. Tricky because of course the newbs came over as soon as Mia was out and that kept Milo and Sky back. But i managed to distract the newbs with thrown treats and eventually got Milo and Sky out too. Heartbreaking hearing Sassy, Nuller and Lily hollering after us as we walked away.
But that was just the start. The Gellerup people had a trailer, but the entrance was kind of narrow and hooked up to a car, not a big ramp to walk up on or anything. I knew getting goats in through that fairly small door was not going to be easy. It took probably half an hour or so. I’m glad Anne was there. I dno’t even know if any of you remember Anne, I haven’t seen her since before I saw Ophelia last. I wasn’t sure she was still around. But she was. And she helped. She told me she had been really worried that they wouldn’t be able to find a home for Milo because of his reputation. She was pretty thankful that they were taking him. I do hope Milo behaves, that is one of the sligh worries.
I went into the trailer and tried luring the goats in. Not working. It would have belped if we’d had collars for the goats. Eventually Anne managed to get a hold of Mia’s horns and I got out and helped drag Mia into the trailer. Then I sat in the trailer and kept Mia there while listening to a big goat hunt outside. After much fussing they managed to drag Milo in. I sat and kept them in. Sky probably took the longest. You know she’s a good escape artist and has experience evading ‘danger’ and keeping a distance. But eventually they got her too and then we were three goats and a guy in a trailer. And the Gellerup people asked me what I wanted to do. And what was I going to say? Of course I was going to sit in the trailer with the goats. I’d do anything to try and keep them safe and comfortable.
Not that that was really possible. It wasn’t a fun ride. Only probably about 30 minutes or so. Maybe less. But once the trailer was closed it was pretty much pitch black in there. Scared goats on a bumpy ride. If only you could tell them what was going on and that they were going to be okay. But to them it’s the end of the world of course. The first 10 minutes or so Sky was braying nonstop. Milo felt like he was hyperventilating. Mia seemed the most calm, I think she sat down.
I has a box to sit on. I did get sent flying at one sudden stop, but it wasn’t too bad. I just kept talkin to the goats and trying to reach them in the dark to comfort them. Not fun, but we got through it.
It went easier when we got there. I got out of the trailer and walked into the new pen and the goats followed me right in. And there we were. At the new home.
The main pen isn’t huge, but there’s a piece of land right next to it and they’re going to put a gate in the fence so the goats can go in there and from there they can get to a chicken area too. Watch out for feathery fowls. Once that gets done they’ll have more space than at the current playground.
There are some trees in the pen which made for a good distraction as they tried getting their bearings in the new surroundings. I’m sure those trees will get picked clean.
Their house seems okay enough. I think their space is a little bigger than one of the stalls in the old goat house. Seems perfectly adequate to me for a family of three that gets a long. Wouldn’t have been good for Sky and Sassy and Lily for example. But for MMS it’s plenty for the nights.
There’s another space inside that is currently being used as storage by a scoujt group. and they’re apparently have some trouble getting the scouts to clear it out. But that might get converted into goat space too later.
It’s a good beginning. Seems nice. With greens and space. Once the bigger pen gets made available it’ll be even better. Much better than I had feared.
There was straw and hay and food and water readay for them inside. Rain came and went to we spent a little time inside. Then back out to look around and snack on greens.
It didn’t take too long before a trio of kids spotted the newcomes and came over. And Mia went right to work proving me right about what a good petting goat she is. She stood there as the kids petted her. Later more kids and staff came by at various points. I got to do quite a lot of talking, introductions and explanations and history and more. I don’t like saying positive things about myself, but I think I did well today. I’m sure I came off as something of a weirdo. But i talked, I helped, I was almost normal. Malene told me several times how thankful she was for my help, how moving them would have been much harder without me, how glad they were that I would be around and she assured me that they’d do all they could to make everyone comfortable and happy, she introduced me to some people, immediately went and got me a key to the place. And then she drove me home and we even talked a little about how I’m probably going to get kicked out of my apartment at some point because they’re tearing down buildings and all that. She was very sympathetic about it all and was easy to talk to. Seemed super kind and sweet and appreciative and just really like a good person. I hope this first impression will hold true.
Everyone I met seemed very nice. And Milo was even on his best behaviour, letting some of the new staff pet him without any problems. Keep it up, kid!
As I said, only problem was when I left. I went around a wall and waited for a minute while they hollered. And the I peed around and there was Mia, out of the pen. I dragged her back in and tried walking off again, but this time I didn’t make it around the wall, I saw her jump over. It’s a tall enough fence that i worry she might hurt herself doing that. We really need it fixed. I had to put them all back in their inside place and close it. Felt bad about doing that, but hopefully they did ok after I left. They need to settle in and get comfortable with the new surroundings. And it does seem like a good place.
Soo, I think that’s the whole story. Tough day, with tough days still to come. But I can’t complain about the outcome. Given the hand we’re dealt, this was the best it could have been. I am kind of mentally and physically broked right now. i’m not gonna spellcheck this sorry! I badly need to eat something. i’ll come back and talk things out with you later. Thank you all so much for the support ! I check in this morning before leaving the house and as I could have expected, you guys were sending lots of love. Let’s hope love will get us through all this. It looks like i’ll still have my Mia, my one and only. And although I love all the littles, Milo and Sky have been with me the longest, been with me through Mio’s passing, been always close because they’re Mia’s kids. I am thankful for this home for them. Now we just need one for the rest. Oh boy.
talk later. Pizza’s here.
16/8 2022
—
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Here is the first picture of Mia, Milo and Sky in their new home. It’s not a great pic, but you can get a sense that they have space. And a tree to destroy.
Just to clear something up from my long rambling post: Sassy, Lily and Nuller are for now still remaining at the current (now old, ugh this will get confusing!) playground. Their situation has not changed today, other than losing their mates. The original plan was for Gellerup to take the youngest goats, but I talked them into taking Mia. good for Mia, and for me. The search for a new home continues for SNL, but for now they stay put. While MMS are now in their new hopefully forever home.
Thank you all so so much for all your lovely comments and posts. I am still going through it all. And as always with fb it’ll get hard for me to keep up with replies to replies, but I really love you all and appreciate the support. You help me get through all this!
The goats and I truly appreciate you all.

16/8 2022
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In the background here you can see their new goat house. It has a sliding door like the old old playground for those of you who remember that. You can see the tree on the left. It’s up on sort of a hill, so I have to be bit careful walking up there.

16/8 2022
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Here is a picture from inside the new hoat house. Poorly framed, but trying to give an idea of the size. It’s a little bigger than it looks here, but you get an idea. Not huge but for a close family to sleep in, it should be ok. Behind me is a middle chamber that they can stand in during rain too and then there’s another room with scout stuff. It would be nice if that room got cleaned out and then they would have even more space. But I’m not unhappy with this.

16/8 2022
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Starting to get that nervous fish-gasping-for-air feeling again. I hope Mia, Milo and Sky are sleeping safely in their new home now and that everything will be ok and that the fence issue will be dealt with and that I haven’t made a horrible mistake by talking them into taking Mia and also hoping that Sassy, Lily and Nuller are dealing with the change okay. They ought to be ok, the groups were almost always seperated, but they’re sensitive animals and must be wondering what is going on and we need to find homes for them too and
I just can’t help worrying.
But. I did my best today. I can only hope it will be for the best. I wish this change didn’t have to be forced on us. I just want everything back as it was… fork.
keep on keeping on.
Thank you all so much for all the love, you helped a lot today.
16/8 2022
—
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Back from day 2 of goating at the new place. A good day. Still issues with Mia escaping, but we’re working on it.
My first time going there by myself, instead of in a dark trailer of goat poop and pee. It took me about 30 minutes to walk there. I’d checked out the route in advance online, but I still had to find my way in unfamiliar surroundings, so that made it take a little longer.
I got there just at the same time as Malene arrived. I asked how things had gone yesterday, and she said it had been fine. The goats pretty much settled down to sleep after I’d left. A big day for them.
They were already out in the pen when we walked over to it, so that was nice to see. As soon as we got over there I could see Mia starting to look at the fence like she was planning to jump. Of course she abandoned that once I went into the pen. It old Malene we needed to do something about the fence and she said “well here is our handyman”. And a van was pulling into the grounds. That was Jesper, he does the carpentry and things like that at the playground.
He came over and we talked a bit about the fence. The fence is about the same height as the fence at the old playground, but i told him how I think the reason that they couldn’t jump that fence was because there’s a horizontal plank at the top of it. Stops them jumping up with the hooves on the top of the fence and kick off over the fence.
So, we decided to try something like that here. Just to see. Peter got some wooden boards and put them on top of the fence. He only had 3 I think though, so not enough to cover all the fence. But we tried it out. I left the pen and pretended to leave, went around the corner. And Mia didn’t get out of the pen. So we thought maybe we’d solved it.
Of course later when it was actually time for me to leave, well Mia got out. Jumping over a part of the fence that hadn’t gotten the extra boards. So, I spent some time goat chasing. And while trying to get Mia back in the pen Sky managed to squeeze out of the gate. Oh dear. Sky is hard to catch. Mia is fast, but she’s a big target and a bit more confident so she’s easier to get close to and get a hold of. Sky is fast and quicker to run away. There was a couple of playground people there, trying to help me. Not really succeeding. But I managed to grab a hold of Sky and get he back in. And Mia too, dragging her around in her sitting position that she gets in when she doesn’t want to be budged. Sheesh. And eventually I got them into their house and locked them in so I could go. Breaks my heart that they get so upset when I leave, but I can’t blame them I guess. I’m the only thing that isn’t new and scary right now.
One of the playground people, a young lady. I’m terrible with names. I think one is called Maja and one Jeanette. Maybe. Anyway, I agreed with her that she’d let them calm down inside and then try taking them out again once I’d been gone for a while. Hopefully that has gone okay. By the way throwing out treats before leaving did not help. That’s how I usually distract them when I leave so I don’t have to listen to the awful sad bleating. distract them with treats on the ground and run away. But that doesn’t work here
Anyway. Malene was at a meeting when I was leaving so I told the young lady about the fencing, how Mia had jumped over a part where they hadn’t put the horizontal planks yet, and she promised to pass that info on and hopefully we can get the whole fence mended like that and hopefully that will stop Mia jumping it. Hooves crossed.
I feel a little more confident about it though because Malene does not seemed worried about her getting out. She said that well they’re always around so it’s not like it would go unnoticed. I still worry how they’d handle Mia out of the pen without me there, but it seems like Malene isn’t worried about it. And you know, they are their goats. They do need to be able to handle the goats, they can’t rely on the wacky volunteer goat herder being there. Even though I came as part of the deal, they would have wanted the goats if i hadn’t been part of it too. They didn’t take the goats to help me out, they wanted to have goats at their playground so they have to be able to handle that. So far I think they do. And so far the goats are popular with the visitors. Lots of “oh there are animals now!” and “oh look there are goats!” and happy kids at the fence. Mia already getting fingers poked in her eyes and a parent warning her kid not to do it, while Mia just takes it chill. Perfect playground goat.
and Malene seems very happy to have them there. At one point her and Maja were leaning on the fence and we were talking and she said “in a couple of days I’ll be in there too sitting with Lasse giving them cuddles!”. Let’s hope so! The goats seem to like Malene too. They didn’t react too strongly to the other playground employees, just the normal “hey I see people” bleats. But when they saw Malene coming they started hollering like they do when they see me or the breakfast feeder guy. Seems to support my first impression of Malene, the goats seem to think she’s nice too.
Heard her tell Jesper that she didn’t know how they’d get the goats moved without my help yesterday. She’s very appreciative of my help and being there.
The goat spent most of the time, that they weren’t agitated, snacking on the brush and trees. there’s lots more edible stuff in this pen than in the old one. They didn’t even want their breakfast mix, which is very unusual. Maybe it’s partly because of all the fuss and change, but it seemed like they just wanted to go around eating greens instead. I went in and got a couple of handfulls to give it to them by hand and they did eat it, but it took some prodding. But they are wolfing down the greens. And duelling all the branches and bushes with the horns. So much that Maja, I think, asked to make sure they weren’t doing it because they were angry. Haha. No, put a branch between a goat’s horns and they’ll fight to the death, and win.
It was nice sitting around, enjoying hot weather that was less humid than yesterday. I can’t remember if I mentioned it but yesterday it was alternately pouring down hard and beaming down with harsh sunshine and the humidity was not pleasant. Better today. Sitting on the hill, watching the goats go at the greens. Talking to the staff and visitors. Getting the goats over to the fence so the kids could pet them. Hopefully this is how things will be going. Just need to sort the fence and make the goats feel happy and secure.
On my way home I tried an alternate route. One that I hadn’t planned out in advance. So I was a little worried if I’d end up getting lost. But that route worked out well, a winding path but still faster than the other way, and it takes me over a bridge which means I can skip a traffic crossing that I was a little skeptic about. I think with effort I could make that walk in 20 minutes, 25 certainly. And I can take a leisurely stroll with my audibook and make it there in half an hour or so without too much trouble. Should be nice enough. There’s a bus that goes part of the way too, but only for like 2 stops. It might cut a little bit of travel time, but it’s not even worth it. As long as my back doesn’t get too bad.
So anyway. A good second day in many ways. When we get that fence fixed and opened a passage to the even bigger pen it will be good.
Thanks for all the love, it’s been some trying days but you help me keep at it.
17/8 2022
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Some other notes from today.
Some people asked about the windows inside the goat place. I checked, and they are covered by metal wires and probably plastic or maybe glass. Only light can come through those, no predators or rain or snow. Compared to the Goat House in the old place where there was literally a wooden board in the wall missing, it’s actually safer and sturdier.
I wanted to ask them if it was possible to get the bench from the old place, but I didn’t managed to sum up the courage and willpower. Give me a break, I did a lot of talking about other things! But I want to ask about it. I also want to ask Malene if she might consider, if they get the second part of the house cleared of the scout stuff, if maybe they could take Sassy, Lily and Nuller too.. there would be enough space inside and outside once that place is cleared and the big pen is opened up. But I don’t think she will want to. I don’t think they want more than the 3 goats, even if they could have space for all 6. But I will try to ask, can’t hurt to ask.
Jesper was very nice. He seemed like a capable guy, kind of guy who can get things done. He listened to my ideas about the fence and got it done immediately, as much as he had material for. I think he’ll get the fence situation sorted.
They talked about getting stuff in the bigger pen for the goats to climb around on, and a shelter for when it rains. Sort of a half-roof like the shelter in the old pen. So that would be good. I wonder if they could get some pavement tiles and let me build some platforms..
It would be nice to have something to sit on. The old bench or platforms or whatever. My butt got wet and dirty, there I said it. I dno’t mind it though, I’m a goat hobo I don’t care about being presentable.
And.. goat butt parade!

17/8 2022
—
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“Oh that’s a cute fence you got there. I hope you enjoy temporarily thinking that’ll be enough”

17/8 2022
—
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Here’s Mia looking at the part of the fence that had the extra board added. She didn’t seem to be able to jump that, so let’s hope it’s the solution when we get it all around the pen.
Now i’m ready to pass out. Only slept about 3-4 hours last night in my chair. Gonna actually go to bed tonight and try to sleep. Thanks everyone again for everything again.

17/8 2022
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No goating today. Taking a break. I don’t know if my logic makes sense, but I thought maybe it would be a good idea to give MMS a full day on their own at the new place. Not relying on me and not having the stress when I leave potentially disturbing the whole rest of their day. Hopefully without me today Mia will stay put in the pen and the’ll have a full, good day of settling down. I hope so anyway. Unfortunately I don’t have the capacity to go see them every day, so they do need to be able to feel okay without me there too.
Now today would have been a great chance to go see SNL of course. But I didn’t. I slept for about 15 hours. My body feels like it’s been through a meat grinder and my mind is exhausted. I think I needed to recharge my batteries. But I have made plans to go to the old place and check up on them, so expect news about them soon. Although I don’t know if there are any new news. I just hope they’re doing ok. They should be.
Hope you’re all doing okay too. Even at my best I’m not great at keeping up with things, and right now I’m just wading through the quickand with my mind on my goats and my goats on my mind. I supremely appreciate how supportive you’ve all been. Couldn’t do it without you.
18/8 2022
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A big thank you to Angeline Slaats for this lovely card. Thank you for thinking of Mia on her 10th birthday! And thank you for taking such good care of your own animals. When I got the news of our goats needing rehoming, I thought of you as a possibility for Mia if there was no chance of finding a home for her close to me. Because I know you would have taken the best of care of her. Thankfully that won’t be necessary, but it shows I think highly of you. Kisses from Mia!

18/8 2022
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Another goat butt parade. This is from shortly after they arrived on Tuesday. Their first meal at their new home. It was nice to see all three lined up, eating from the same container. At the old place you had six goats fighting for 4 containers and Sky ending up standing outside hoping for the feeder to bring her some scraps so she could eat in peace. I’m sure there will still be some scuffles, goats and food you know, but this must be much better for her.

18/8 2022
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Here is a goatlog from Mia’s 10th birthday party. I added about 10 new goatlogs to the youtube channel, just to get completely up to date with all the videos from ..the beforetimes. I don’t expect anyone to go watch all that, but I like having it all up there. Our life on video.
Right now I’m editing footage from Tuesday. Reliving the move. Phew, that was a tough day.

18/8 2022
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Editing video from the move day.
Had to laugh at Malene telling the goats “I hope you pooped real good in that trailer”.
I’m not sure whose trailer they borrowed, but apparently Malene enjoyed the thought of them having to clean it out afterwards. Haha. I like Malene, the goats like Malene. Seems like Keiko would like Malene too. Fellow goat berry enthusiast. At least in this instance.18/8 2022
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I did double goat duty today.
Yes, finally managed to visit the SNL newbs. It was good to see them again, but it also kind of broke my heart.
But I am going to go through my day in chronological order. I started out going to the new playground. I was there first so i got to let the goats out. I am pretty sure I did not do that a single time since they moved into the Goat House at the old place. But it’s easier when you live closer.
Nice to see the goats come out and look around and immediately start munching on greens. The fence situation has not been fixed. I think they need materials, I heard Jesper say something about how they’d had wooden boards lying around but they’d been disposed off just before the goats arrived. Much to his displeasure. But hopefully they’ll get it sorted soon.
They have gotten a passage made in the fence leading into the bigger pen. So the goats can now go into that space. I thook them in there and we walked around. Lots and lots of green to munch on in there. It will be nice when they build a shelter and hopefully other things in there. For now it’s just a big open space with plants and greens along the edges. We did do a little running in there. Their herd mentality is extra strong right now, sticking together like glue. When I started moving forward at high pace they all started runnig ahead. And then turning to look at the slow human. But it’s nice. And we had nice visitors at the fence too, feeding and petting the goats. But most of the time they spend snacking on greens. I’m glad the move was done in summer, all that green stuff has been great at distracting them and giving them something to do. At the old place there was barely any green to eat. I mean, there was grass. But for whatever reason the goats had zero interest in it. I don’t know if they just ate all the best parts early on or it wasn’t very edible grass or if they only grazed on it when I wasn’t around, but I literally had to lure them to the grassy parts with treats when I wanted to do any filming of them in the grass. Mostly they just ignored it. The only greens they really got to eat was when people brought stuff into the pen. The new place is completely different. It’s like the whole thing is edible. Grass and plants and trees and bushes. So much that they didn’t realise that their breakfast got served inside.
Which came in handy later. When it was time for me to go I had to get them inside so I wouldn’t have to go through more rounds of Catch The Esape Goats fun. So I got them in and they were eating their chow and were happy… until I closed the door and locked it and started walking away. And then the hollering began. Breaks my heart. Mia is so loud. There are some soccer fields next to the pens and i have to walk past them and I could hear Mia’s cries bellowing through the landscape. Sheesh. Way to guilt trip me.
I went into the playground building and let them know that I’d put the goats inside. The guy I talked to was surprised that Mia can jump the fence, apparently she hadn’t done that yesterday when I wasn’t there. So that’s good to know. I was wondeing and worried if she’d jumped out while I wasn’t there. But I guess it’s only when I’m there and leaving her… I told them that once I was gone and the goats had calmed down they could let them back out in the pen. Hopefully that goes ok. But I do hope the fence situation gets resolved soon.
So, then it was time to my second job.
Thankfully there’s a bus going from right outside the new playground to almost right outside the old. The downside is it only goes once and hour. So if I miss it, say because I’m wrestling escaped goats, then I have to either walk for about an hour or wait an hour for the next one. But at least there’s a bus. And I caught it and got to hte new place.
As I was walking through, Lars spotted me and called me over. He asked how the move had gone and how the goats were doing. And how I was coping, which I thought was very nice of him to consider. So I told him that things were going okay and it seemed like a nice place and other than Mia’s fence jumping it seems good. And then I asked if there was any news about SNL. And there wasn’t. Unless I had anything? Well, I told him I’d gotten some suggestions on the facebox but hadn’t had time to look at them yet. I asked if he wanted the list so they could go through and see if any of them were possible homes, and he said that would be good. So I’m gonna get my dad to print it out and get it to them next week. I’ve been meaning to go through the list myself and try to find out how viable the various places might be, but you know. Things kept coming up. Coming up much faster than expected. But it’s nice that they will go through it themselves then. I do worry a bit. Every time I’ve asked if there are news about it the answer has been “No, unless you?”. I hope they aren’t just sitting back and hoping I come up with something. But I do get the impression that Lars wants to find a solution that works.
Oh and I asked him about the old old playground, Bispehaven. But he said they are not wanting to have animals again. so that is unfortunately not an option.
After that little chat I went ove to the goat pen. The newbs were sitting in the goat house. I called out to them but it took a while before they decided to get up and come over. They did enjoy treats at the fence though, like good old times. I know i’m projecting, but it was hard not to feel like they were sad. They weren’t up to much playing around. They did get some treats and cuddles, but it felt like the mood was downcast. Nuller was bleating quite a bit, but they were all his ‘sad little boy’ bleats. He’d usually go from those into his ‘maniacal teenager’ kind of bleats. But he kept his sad voice on today. More guilt trips. And they worked. I felt awful. I felt so bad. I felt like I was abandoning my friends, like I an ash hole and that by talking othe new place into taking MMS I could have doomed SNL or at least robbed them of a lovely steady future in a good place. It suck man. Nuller has crawled around on me since he was a newborn, like Mia did. Lily is a sweet sweet cuddlebug. And Sassy is the laziest goat around until there’s a whiff of food then she’s the fastest goat around. I love them. i feel terrible that we are losing what we had.
I think part of the reason the mood was a little down may also have been simply that it was now after noon on a warm day and this is the time when they just really want to sit and relax. Which they did. But yeah. It was good to seem, and they do seem like they are okay, but I just wish I could be Superman and save everything. Life ain’t fair, man.
It’s been quite a week. Hasn’t been easy, physically and mentally. And I’m still trying to fight back the depression and anxiety. And I could need a shoulder rub.
I’m going to try to unwind for the weekend and hopefully keep on keeping on. I know many many people have it much much worse. And many animals too. But you know. We live in our own lives and our own troubles are the ones we feel the most. And then the great thing about beeing overly empathic is you feel everything elso too so it’s a swell time to live in this awesome world where everything is going great, now hooray who wants to eat.
19/8 2022
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Here are the newbs today. Sassy in front then Lily and then Nuller.

19/8 2022
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Here’s Mia, Milo and Sky out in the big pen. You can see the opening in the fence on the left, leading up to their red train carriage house thing.

19/8 2022
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Here is some video from Tuesday. The big move, and what came before and after. Tough day.
19/8 2022
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Sad boy bleater Nuller and sad boy uncle

20/8 2022
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Here’s Mia taking stock of the big pen. Looks like it’s well stocked with greens.

20/8 2022
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Happy Funday everyone. I guess I will try to start up the morning affirmations again. I don’t feel sure the days will be good, but at least there is hope.

21/8 2022
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goatlog from Tuesday, the big moving day. Basically just a longer version of the two videos posted on Mia’s page, one of which I shared here on my personal page too. More of the time spent in the rain before the move and more of the time with MMS settling in a the new place. But nothing groundbreakingly new. I like have it all documented though.

21/8 2022
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Don’t worry, I meant to do this.
Mia thinks she has the situation under control. Milo remains unconvinced.

21/8 2022
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Sassy really missed… the backpack full of food.
Bit of video from my trip back to the old place up on Mia’s page: https://www.facebook com/CutestGoatEver/posts/pfbid0cHANer1MczHcihU5ER3wffSj1JSwKmXNsuztCPftiGcKqRPkEVwmodC2foEdEUm8l
And can I just say I hate fb’s url obfuscation techniques thanks
21/8 2022
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I’m going to miss this house. I remember being a little bit skeptic about it at first, because they were living inside a properly built building, a real stables. This thing is a little more.. home-built. A little wobbly. Built purely of wood, not bricks and mortar. And as some of you noticed a board fell out of the back wall at some point. But it’s a cool place, it looks neat and has personality and it was cool to just have a Goat House that was actually like a house. With hiding spot beneath for Sky when she needed safety or all of them when they needed to cool down. It’s a sad thought that it’s going to just stand there empty for probably years or who knows how long. I don’t know what their plans are, but I doubt they’d want the horses to be able to get into the goat pen, probably wouldn’t be as safe for the horses. As far as I know horses don’t like jumping around on stuff as much. They do better on the plain surfaces. Anyway, rambling now. I’m just going to miss that place, the sound of hooves on the floor and all. Sigh. Life comes at you fast sometimes. A month ago I thought this was a steady future ahead.

21/8 2022
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Here is a goat butt parade to end the week.
It’s been a tough week. Everything suddenly happened very fast and I was forced into situations I did not want to be in. I don’t like saying nice things about myself, but I think I did as well as I could, under the circumstances. Who knows what would have happened if I weren’t there. Could have been a lot worse, don’t think it could have been better.
I hate that this has happened and i don’t know when or if I can get back to feeling just okay. Right now it’s sort of on autopilot. One day at a time, trying to do what’s needed to be done for the better for the goats and get through the day until the next one comes. Can’t stop time, no point wasting energy on things that aren’t possible.
I hope next week will go okay. I’ll be delivering the list of possible homes or leads for them to the old playground. Need the newbs to be safe everyone to settle into things.
Thanks everyone for the love and support, and the distractions. It’s good to have a place where I can write out my frustrations and get suggestions and have people who help me feel better. I feel kind of like I’ve been thrown into the deep end of hte pool without being able to swim. Have I already used that metaphor? I don’t know. Everything is a blur and I feel like I could sleep for a week. It’s not easy for me having to deal so much with humans and important things, but I’m doing my best for the goats. I owe them that much.

21/8 2022
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That’s all for now.

I hope you will have a good Mio Monday.
Thank you everyone for the comments on the big news. I know it’s a shocker. I am not surprised you all care so much, I am a little overwhelmed with all the comments and such. I have tried to get back to everyone, but it’s hard with facebook’s bad system, especially replies to replies to comments, it gets almost impossible for me to keep up. Sorry if I have missed anything. Thank you all so much for caring. Thank you for your suggestions too. I have noted some stuff down that I have to look at. I want to make it clear that they do not want to put down the goats, that was the first thing Lars told me. I don’t want to make it sound like they don’t care about the goats and just want to get rid of them. They have to be rehomed, but we’ll find a way. I think it will end up being hard on me whatever the outcome, but we’ll do all we can to make it good for the goats.
I was up all night so now I’m going to go to bed and sleep for a long long time and dream myself away. And then i’ll be needing some good goat time, because that is still a place I can be happy. When I’m there with the goats it still feels like heaven. So I need all I can get of that. Have to to start preparing for Mia’s birthday too, it’s on Sunday. Sigh. Let’s all wish for her to get a safe happy home as soon as possible.
Again, thank you all for caring and wanting to help. All my disabilities make it even harder. Even just walking up to Ophelia, whomst I really like, to ask how it’s going is hard. I know some of you would be much more capable and proactive about this. But I’ll do my best to keep fighting. I’m just an old goat too.

8/8 2022
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HappY Yogi daY everyone.
Talk later.

9/8 2022
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Good goat times today. It is still my happy place. Although it’s tinged now with the sadness of knowing I will lose it soon.. whatever happens, this part of my life is going to end. Feels like you’re holding diamonds in your hand and they’re slipping out through your fingers and there’s nothing you can do about it..
But I do want to enjoy my last time there. I’m still happy in the moments with the goats. Hard not to be. They are my everything, now.
I did some weeding. Brought gloves and pulled up stinging nettles. Kinda stupid when you know in a few months I won’t even be going back there. In a few months they’ll be dying out anyway from the cold. Seasons change, fa la. But I just wanted to get some of the worst ones away from the places I like to sit. Of course I got stung quite a bit in the process. Because I’m smart. Sm rt. Too bad the goats don’t eat stinging nettles. They don’t get hurt by tem but they aren’t interested in eating them. I thought goats were supposed to do the weeding for us?! Blabla. If only they could weed out some humans..
Thanks everyone for all the support and stuff, and stuff.
9/8 2022
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Can’t have one without the other

9/8 2022
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A bit of goat butt parade. And other.

9/8 2022
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For the Keiko level subscribers, here is a berry video. Still gotta laugh a little.
9/8 2022
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Have a good Hump Day everyone. With bonus humps.

10/8 2022
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Lily on her platform. She either sits there, or next to wherever Nuller sits.

10/8 2022
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Have a good day everyone. Here’s Vanilje from 2007.

11/8 2022
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goatlog

11/8 2022
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Mia, Milo and Sky. Really hope we can keep the family together. I have autored a letter detailing the natural grouping of the goat herd, I am not sure how aware the playground staff is of their natural split in two groups. And since I’m not always good at talking to humans, bleat bleat, I thought i’d write it out and give it to them in the hopes that they’ll pay attention to that. And also with a request that if possible they talk to the Gellerup playground and see if we can’t get them to take Mia since she’s the best at being playground-goat. Hooves crossed.

11/8 2022
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Thank you to everyone talking about writing letters or emails or petitions etc. I am a little wary, I don’t want to make things adversarial right now. As it stands the playground is doing what they can to find a good home for the goats that can’t go to Gellerup, and it’s not up to them to change the overall decisions, since it’s imposed on them too. I will give them the letter I wrote and hopefully they will understand how the goats should be split in their groups. And hopefully they will see the idea in asking Gellerup to consider taking Mia even though she’s a bit old.
I know it’s easy to see the playground as the bad guys here, but right now we are still on the same team trying to solve things. There are things they can’t change and so far I have no reason to think they won’t listen to my thoughts.
Incidentally, my dad was over today with prints of the letter I wrote (I don’t have a printer myself), and he was talking about appealing to the council etc. He’s got some experience with politics and the government etc. I don’t really believe there’s any chance of the overall decision being changed, they’re not going to change how things work just for my benifit. I’m just some random weirdo. But anyway. I told my dad he could try to look into appealing to the council or whatever he might come up with. I don’t have any hope really of that working, but I guess we can hope.
We’ll keep on working for the best outcome. And if I do think we need letters or media or whatever I will surely come to you all. I know some of you would love to write some angry complaints haha. But again. I don’t want to be antagonistic while we’re working to solve things.
11/8 2022
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Hope you have a good day today. Here’s Ping and Pong from 2016.

12/8 2022
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gorgeous goat day. Heatwave advisory on the forecast. Upwards of 27C/80F. Had a goat party. Mia turns 10 on Sunday and since I don’t go in the weekend we celebrated today. Raspberrie,s strawberries, blueberries, grapes. Turned into lots of berries everywhere.
12/8 2022
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We’re alreaday out of food? The caterer gets zero stars on yelp for this

12/8 2022
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Guess who’s deathly afraid of flags? Another one to add to Milo’s lists of ‘do not bring that thing near me”

12/8 2022
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It was so hot today that the goats all relocated to under the house.

12/8 2022
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Okay, I have an important update. And it’s not a good one, unfortunately.
I wasn’t sure when to tell everyone, I kinda wanted to try to wait so we could have a good day on Sunday to celebrate Mia’s birthday. But I don’t want to keep the news from you, and it’s burning me up inside.
I have been informed that the goats going to Gellerup will be moved on Tuesday. Yes, this Tuesday. So much for ‘September/October” I guess.
I do not know how many or which goats will be going. All I know is they don’t want Mia because she’s too old.
Now, I haven’t given up hope on that part yet. I’m going to be there Tuesday and I’m going to plead my case for them taking Mia. And for them not splitting the naturally bonded groups of the goats. It’s not impossible, but I don’t think chances are good.
Let me tell you what happened today. We’d had the lovely birthday party for Mia. And I had the letter that I wrote in my pocket. And I was trying to gather up the nerve to go talk to the staff about it all. And my anxiety was crippling me. I just couldn’t do it. Even with something that I care about so much. I just froze.
So I literally stood at the fence for about an hour, pretending to pet the goats while secretly hoping SOMEONE would notice me and come over and talk. Or that I would hear Ophelia’s voice so I knew there was someone there that i felt fairly comfortable talking to.
But no luck. There were people, but no one coming over to the pen and no Ophelia. Eventually time was up and I had to start heading home. I went through the playground grounds (normally I go down past the pen and on the paths there, away from the grounds), hoping that Ophelia would be there and just hadn’t been talking. But no Ophelia. so I started leaving. Walking away. At the last possible moment I turned to a path that goes around one of the buildings and I sort of pretended that I was looking for someone there, or whatever. I was actually gathering courage. And then I managed to turn around and walk back toward the playground buildings. And I poked my head in through a door and said “excuse me” and told them I wanted to give them a letter about the goats, and my wishes and the bondings of the goats etc. And before I could even give them the letter Lars said “good that you’re here. Gellerup will be coming to pick up the goats on Tuesday”.
So that was a gut punch. Good thing I managed to go back and talk to them so I found out. They want me to be there. After I’d mentioned about the goats bonding the other guy, I think his name is Adam, nice guy, he asked who ‘number 18’ was bonded with. And I told him about Sky and Mia. And he said he was really going to miss that guy. Apparently he’s gotten quite close with Milo. Nice to know Milo has made friends, not just made people scared of him. Not that it does him much good now…
They both commended me on ‘doing my homework’ and trying to inform them, they seemed to appreciate it. “That’s exactly the kind of stuff that’s hard for us to pick up on” they said about the bondings.
Lars and I went over to another building so he could check that he got the right date and time that the Gellerup people would come. While we were walking over there I blabbled a little about how good Mia was with kids, and Lars said “great, that’s the kind of stuff that’s helpful”. He didn’t shut down the idea of Mia going to Gellerup. But it sounds like the Gellerup people will basically come over and get to pick who they want. And so, it will be up to me to make my case to them. To try and convince them that Mia is the perfect playground goat even though she’s old. And try to advocate for them taking the natural bondings of the goats into consideration for their welfare and well being.
good things I’m so great at talking to people, huh…
Well, I’ll be forced into the situation, so there’s no choice. I’ll have to do my best. It’s a lot to process. It’s scary and frustrating. Best case scenario I convince them to take Mia, Milo and Sky. If they don’t want that then taking Sassy, Lily and Nuller. Worst case they just pick randomly. They’d probably take Sky because she’s the ‘baby’. And then probably one or two of the newbs. Which would be awful for Sky. I will do my best to avoid that.
But whatever happens it will be hard. Tuesday will be the end of my goat paradise. Having Mia, Milo and Sky right next door would be wonderful. But even so I’d lose three other goats I love. And I’m still worried if the conditions at Gellerup playground will be ok for the goats. It almost certainly won’t be as good as our current location. That’s pretty much 100% sure. In a way it might almost be better if Mia didn’t com to Gellerup, if she could go to a proper sanctuary or to Angeline or something, somewhere perfect where she would have all she needs and be well taken care of. But she wouldn’t have me. And I wouldn’t have her.
I don’t forking know. I cried in the shower when I got home. I think it’s the first time I’ve cried about this. I have been sad and depressed and worried of course, but I have kept it in. Tried to focus on having a good summer with them and working for the best results, but now it’s just all very real. And right around the corner. Literally. Four days. And I don’t know what’s going to happen or what will be best or how I will deal with what will happen. I just want it all to go away.
Sigh. Turns out there wasn’t time for my dad to look into the council and politics and all. And your letters wouldn’t have made it in time.
Oh, and there is no news about a home for the goats that won’t go to Gellerup. Lars again told me to bring him any ideas I might have. I hope they are really looking. The first thing he said to me when the news broke was that they do not want to put them down. They better keep that. I still have some of your suggestions to look at and pass along if they are possibilities. And I don’t even know who’s home I’m searching for, I don’t know anything.
I feel pretty broken.
Incidentally, my dad just informed that my mother has been walking around with a broken back since she fell about six months ago. It’s not a big break, apparently, it should be ok. Shouldn’t be serious, i’m told. But she needs to get that fixed obviously. Did I mention that my dad’s dementia exam thing has been moved up further, now November instead of December. So that’s something. I just feel like everying’s going to shit. The whole world on a global scale and my personal and family life and everything.
I’m trying to fight off the depression. it’s not easy. I am not good at dealing with things. I prefer burying my head in the sand. But now it’s quicksand and, well mixed metaphors get me nowhere. I can’t avoid dealing with this. Things just change sometimes at the snap of a finger, everything gets turned around and suddenly what you thought you had is fading..
Okay I better shut up before I go completely down the spiral. Thanks for listening. I will of course keep you all updated. Next week will be very important, with lots of stuff still to do.
Thanks for all the support. I know the goats mean a lot to a lot of you too. I’ll try to get some kind of happy future with and for them. I wish it didn’t have to change.
love you loves.
12/8 2022
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Okay.I am heading to bed now. I’ll probably stay there for about 24 hours. I’m a bit of a nervous wreck right now. But I’m trying to remain calm and pragmatic. What will happen will happen. I will do my best, but most of it is out of my hands. We’ll just have to see how it goes.
I just wish i could freeze time.
Thanks for the support everyone, as always. Hope you’re all doing okay.
13/8 2022
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Happy Funday everyone. I hope you will have a good day. Happy Birthday, Mia. light of my life. I wish I could give you everything you want and need all the time. I hope the coming days will work out okay for us all.
14/8 2022
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My favourite pizza place is back after a month’s vacation. Treated myself to their expensive goodness, in honour of Mia’s big day. And my big belly.. Nice to see the regular delivery guy again.
I’d give up pizza in a heartbeat in exchange for a good goat outcome, of course.14/8 2022
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Mia’s birthday party. At least I got to have that before they sprung the news on me.
14/8 2022
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That’s all for now.