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Fray

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I am not feeling so great.

Mainly because it feels like my eyesight has gotten worse. It’s hard to say how. Is it the light, if it the right eye that’s seeing less, is it the blood in the left, is it temporary or forever and so on. It’s a little harder to read the text on the computer and TV’s teletext. A little. I think. I was hoping that it was just the effects of the eyedrops from yesterday’s checkup at the hospital. But it’s still there, so I guess not. Who knows. And what can you do. Other than wait and hope for the best. It’s just hard not to worry. Not to get depressed. I wish I could get away from it all. A holiday in the sun.

The checkup went okay. Nothing new to see in my eyes, apparently. We got another appointment in a couple of months. There’s not much more they can do right now, they say. Just have to wait for things to settle after the surgeries. And then eventually the removal of the oil and the getting of glasses. Wait and see how good it can get. But it’s never going to be good again. I’m trying to keep hope that it will get somewhat better. That’s all that’s keeping me from going totally insane I guess. Grasping at straws.

I’m going to get referred to the “sight central” place now. To see if they can do something to help me. Some guidance and accesories, perhaps. We’ll see what they can do.

I haven’t seen the goats yet. They eyedropped both my eyes at the hospital so that wasn’t a good time to be out in the sun. We wen’t straight home. We were going to go today instead. But I ended up canceling that as well. I was feeling too tired and depressed. I needed a day of nothingness. And that’s what it has been. But we’ll try again tomorrow. Hopefully then we will succeed. So I can get some time with the goats. I could sure use that now.

In other news, my dad is going to set up an appointment for me with the doctor. He thinks my toes are looking bad. I can’t see it myself, of course. They don’t feel worse than usual I think. But on the other hand I did have a dream a few days ago wherein I lost a foot. And when you have diabetes you have to be careful with your feet. So I guess it’s for the best to go and let the doc look at them. I just don’t need more bad news. I have enough to deal with. What I wouldn’t give for a break. Just a little one.

This entry was posted on Thursday, August 6th, 2009 at 19:04 and is filed under Blogging. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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