2017 Runs Out
Today will be a good day. Here’s me and Mads from 2006. Merry christmas and all that jazz.
25/12 2017
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Good goat times today. After celebrating Christmas with the human family yesterday, it was time to celebrate with the goat family today. Windy and rainy. No white christmas this year. But the goaties enjoyed their treats. The newbies are still super cute. Chubby little tubas. So snugglerific. The girl, Sky, is the most personable I think. Maybe because she’s also the one who already has a sweet tooth. Giving her little raisin bits and she comes asking for more. Milo isn’t too interested in treats. And he’s also a tiny bit skittish when petted sometimes. But they are both very friendly and happily grazing in the wet grass. They did manage to give me a fright, though. When it was time to take them all into the goat pen the little ones were busy with the grazing so I took Mia and Mio in first. It took a couple of minutes, they were on ropes and I had to get it all untangled etc. Then I went back for the little ones. And they were gone. I went circling around the block and couldn’t see them anywhere. And I was like I LOST THE BABIES. Worst uncle Dad ever. Then I went inside to check and there they were, happily sweeping the floor for goodies. I guess when I took Mia and Mio they just followed along in the same direction without me noticing it,. Sheesh. Well, lesson learned. From now on I take them FIRST and don’t let them out of my sight until they’re under lock and key. Haha. Little rascals.
We had some assertion of dominance today too. Both Mia and Mio chased the little ones away a couple of times. I don’t think they’re going to gel into one big group while the little ones are… little. Maybe when they get bigger they can hold their ground a little and earn some respect. But I think it’s likely we’ll have two duos hanging out together but not super close. That’s okay, though. That’s still sweet. And everyone has a partner. They seem quite bonded, the little ones. If I pick one of them up then the other one starts bleating like “where’d my mate go? I’m all alone and it’s scary”. Sweetiepies.
There was one worrying thing with Mia and Mio today, though. They had something on their faces. I’m not completely sure what it is. My first thought was some sticky food or something. My second was mouth sores. I’m really not sure. There was some of it that was sticky stuff in their fur. But I can’t tell. I told Finbarr about it and he took photos of it to send to Alice. She’s on vacation. We’ll see. I came home and looked up sore mouth on the internets. Turns out there’s no cure for it, you just have to let it run its course. If it gets really bad you can do some stuff to ease it, but otherwise it’s just to wait it out. So if it is sore mouth then it’s no emergency, it’s just to wait. And if it’s not, then all the better. But hey, funny thing. Sore mouth can be transmitted to humans. And I had no idea, so I’ve been touching them. Trying to get the sticky stuff out of their fur. So if it is sore mouth then I’ma get some sores for sures. I guess we’ll see. Otherwise they were completely normal and happy and there was nothing wrong with their appetite. Nothing at all.
25/12 2017
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This is what I was talking about. I was kind of able to wipe some of it away later. But, I don’t know. Can any of you goat people out there tell for sure if it is or isn’t sore mouth? I guess we’ll just have to wait and see in any case.
25/12 2017
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I love chubby little goat butts and I cannot lie
25/12 2017
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Hi, you called the goat mechanic hotline? How can we help?
25/12 2017
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That’s all for today. I am very tired. Also bloated from all the christmas food. I am like a goat, I can never stop eating. Also I’m like a goat in that I am actually a goat bleat bleat feed me.
Hope you’re all have a seasonal wonderfulmas of salutated joy and say jolly to your cola. Don’t forget, all holidays matter. I had been planning to not use the C word this year, but then I realised that would have been letting the boogeyman dictate what I do and even though I sleep with all the lights on and with my finger over the 1 button having alread dialled 91 doesn’t mean i’m scared of you. You and whose troll army?!
We didn’t get a white christmas in Denmark this year. I’ll get my tiki torches and we’ll show the snowflakes how pretty and unique they are which is why we love them and mix our metaphors with eggnog nog who’s there You? You who? YUUUUHOOOO. Yippie kay aye muddy forklifters.
By the way, all your families and animals are wonderful and I am humbled that I get to be a tiny part of it, to watch and delight despite my flaws and failings. Thanks for letting me in.
This post is copyright 2017 by the Henriksen Foundation, all rights reserved except the right to remain silent which has been waved in fa vour of going on and on and o
25/12 2017
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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi day.
26/12 2017
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When I am king the first new order shall be a decree that pizza places are not allowed to be closed for the christmas holidays. Blasphemy!
26/12 2017
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Hope you’ve all had a jolly one
link: merry christmas you filthy animals video
26/12 2017
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Here’s another old christmas photo of Mads and the grinch who stole christmas treats.
26/12 2017
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Hmm, maybe I should unwrap that Jessica Alba shaped package under the tree. It’s been lying very still for a few days now..
26/12 2017
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In my filenaming structure, pictures of Milo and Sky are named milosky, which continues to make me think of some Czech presidential candidate or something. Vote for Jan Milosky, he won’t get your goat.
26/12 2017
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A little more goats of christmas past. Dear Magnethe, posing with her favourite bucket. The one that had food in it.
26/12 2017
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What? No, I haven’t been nibbling on your lumber. Tree sap? Don’t know anything about that, mate. Gotta go!
26/12 2017
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I was wondering why Denmark was trending on twitter all of a sudden.
Apparently USA beat us in the hockeystick game. Well, who’s got free health care and the best goats?! You can keep your hockeysticks.
27/12 2017
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My biggest aspiration in life is to become one of those sitcom characters who are constantly referenced but never seen onscreen.
27/12 2017
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Today will be a good day. Happy hump day, guys.
27/12 2017
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I miss gravy.
27/12 2017
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Another old one of Magnethe.
27/12 2017
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So, how’s Puerto Rico doing? They must be overjoyed that we won the war on Christmas. They are probably so merry right now. So merry. Who needs electric power, christmas trees need good old fashioned candlelights.
27/12 2017
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goatlog
27/12 2017
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This is how you mostly find them. Side by side, nibbling on something.
27/12 2017
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I hereby sentence the owners of my favourite pizza place to endure a Police Academy marathon for the remainder of the period of time that they keep their establishment closed. *makes gavel noise with mouth*
27/12 2017
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That’s all for today. I sentence myself to a trip to dreamland. Harsh but fair. But that’s neither here nor there. Oh wait, it’s right over there by the burning bush. I knew I should have picked the non smoking section. Can you believe the year is almost over? It looks like we actually might make it to 2018. And for every year that passes the Mayans are looking stupider and stupider. Worst apocalypse predictors ever. I’m glad I didn’t bet any money on it. I would have looked right foolish. And If I had won then there wouldn’t have been anyone to pay out my winnings what with it being the apocalyspe and all. Don’t suppose the four horsemen could paypal it to me. I wonder if the four horsemen might be centaurs. Or insurance salesmen. Or little polka dotted pygmy hippos that squawk like parrots when you rub their bellies. I mean really, if you’re going to have unconditional faith in something that can’t be proven, then why not in little polka dotted pygmy hippos that squawk like parrots when you rub their bellies.
I hope you all feel appropriately awed and humbled that you got to witness the birth of what will surely be the greatest religion of all time, at least until the world ends on January 2nd according to the gospel of the farting centaur that wears too warm clothes even in summer and then too light clothes in winter just to keep some sort of symmetry to its existence, hallowed be thy name, amen.
Please tip the collection plate on your way out. The church of the little polka dotted etc does not accept paypal, bitcoin or wooden nickels. If you own a private jet then you can deduct all contributions, just remember to fill out all the forms in illegible cursive and mail it to us before the end of the world, or as soon as possible thereafter.
Thank you for flying with Lasse’s brain. We hope you have enjoyed the ride. We are now going to dump all passengers in the ocean and look forward to seeing you again in tihe iAfterlife (A trademark of Apple and Snake limited).
[please reboot universe to play again]
27/12 2017
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Vanilje from 2006.
28/12 2017
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Good goat times today. Started out a little damp, but eventually the sun came out and it was a rather lovely, if cold, day. Have I mentioned that the new goat kids are cute? I feel like I have to tell you because you probably can’t tell from the pictures and videos. But they are. Very cute. It’s so good to be able to have goat kid times again. When we moved to this place I thought I might never get to experience it again. Nothing better than sitting with two little kids in your lap. And their little bleats. They cute litlte chubby chipmunk faces. If I didn’t know better I could almost think they were Mio’s babies. They have her width. They are just perfectly adorable. I love how when I pick one up they both start bleating. They don’t want to be apart even for a little. If I want them to go somewhere I can just pick up one and walk there, and the other will follow behind. And it’s hard not to laugh when I’m sitting with them and then I look up and there are Mia and Mio starting at me with a look that says “How very dare you”. Don’t worry, big babies. Nothing could replace them. We’ve been through a lot and they are my family. But it’s nice to have a couple of little ones to liven things up.
A family came by today, with curious little kids. I lifted one of the (goat) kids up and took it to the fence so the humans could get a good look and pet it and ask some questions. Very sweet. Everyone loves the little ones.
28/12 2017
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Pretty pretty cute.
28/12 2017
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A lovely blue sky, and lovely white goats.
28/12 2017
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That’s all for today. The Lasse is tired and must recharge. Plug it in the mains and leave overnight.
Several friends seem to have lost animals today/yesterday. That’s the sad part of getting to know people. You get to share the sad too. I know you’ve all had to share some big sads with me. Love to you all, and goatspeed beyond for the little ones. Thank goatness for new and old life that keeps us going. Life, eh? It’s like a box of chocolate. And hopefully you get chocolate.
See you tomorrow, peepers, with any luck.
28/12 2017
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Mia and Peanut flashback
29/12 2017
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I had many wonderful dreams last night. And I am not making this up but in two seperate dreams I first hung out and talked to Louis CK and then the next it was Kevin Spacey. I am pretty sure that if I had stayed in bed then Bill Cosby would have showed up eventually. Forget clowns, there’s a new nightmare breed in town.
They were actually nice dreams, not anything controversial. Not sure that will hold up in court, though.
29/12 2017
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I thought government officials weren’t allowed to mention global warming?
29/12 2017
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Good news, everyone. My favourite pizza place is open again. Thank you all for standing by me through this difficult time. Now is a time for healing, and pizza.
29/12 2017
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goatlog. Shaka when the snow fell.
29/12 2017
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Don’t worry, ladies. You’re still my loves.
29/12 2017
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Farts Walk With Me
29/12 2017
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Looks like someone forgot a santa hat in the goat pen. Hmm, I wonder who that could be…
29/12 2017
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It’s December 29th. You know what that means. Only a couple of days left to live up to your resolutions from last New Year’s.
If I don’t eat any pizzas for the last couple of hours of 2017, that counts as “give up pizzas” right?
Also, side thought: Do you think Gordon Ramsay ever gets invited to any Christmas dinners? I’d shirt my pants if I had to cook Christmas dinner for Gordon Ramsay.
29/12 2017
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Oh I forgot to mention. While doing shopping yesterday a woman stopped me and asked if I could help her. Sure, I said. Thinking that maybe asking the blind guy covered in mud and goatprints weren’t the best idea, but hey I could give it a shot. She said she needed some snacks that looked like bacon. Or something like that. I happened to know of something called “bacon snacks”. They don’t really look like bacon, but they’re some kind of crispy chips kinda thing with bacon flavour, I guess. And we were right next to them so I gave her a bag of that and she seemed happy with it. I forgot to pick up a paycheck on my way out but I’m very optimistic about my new career as snack identifier for the supermarket.
I don’t actually eat those things anymore myself, but now I wonder if they’re ok for vegetarians. I mean, they have nothing to do at all with meat. I’m not sure where there flavouring comes from, it’s probably some synthetic poisoneous thing. I’m pretty sure the only bacon thing about it is the name. Who knows.
29/12 2017
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My facebox is going mental. When I go to look at my newsfeed posts keep flashing by. Appearing, disappearing. New posts, same same. It’s like Facebox was a clogged drain that got cleared and now all the posts are flooding out like a portapotty being emptied after the Roskilde festival. Anyway, I basically can’t read posts while this is happening. So I hope it’s temporary.
29/12 2017
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Today will be a good day. Here’s the grand Preben from 2012.
My Facebox is unfortunately still malfunctioning. I don’t know when I’ll be able to look at my newsfeed again.
30/12 2017
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Fiddlesticks and flour pots. Tiddlywinks and tummy knots. Obla dee obla dah fugue
30/12 2017
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goatlog
30/12 2017
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Angels with dirty faces
30/12 2017
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You’re probably all going to hear the rumours sooner or later so I might as well just come clean right now. Yes, I am a Danish. A cream filled one. I was brought to life by an ancient pastry wizard to serve as his houseboy in the castle on top of Mount Donut. I escaped by poisoning his oatmeal one morning, turning him into a cat. Points for the reference. I could tell you the rest, but I think yo should just watch the animated feature that Disney is putting out next Christmas. The Princess And The Doughboy. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get baked.
30/12 2017
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Editing goat footage. Lil Milo is sitting in my lap chewing his cud. While Sky is bucking her head against me to try to get at the treatbag in my pocket. So far it seems like the little boy is the mellow one and the little girl is the feisty one.
30/12 2017
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That thing when Esther the Wonder Pig knows the name of your goats. Swoon. Esther and her dads are such an inspiration. And joy. If you faceboxers get just a little bit of that joy from our Danish goat gang then I am very happy about that. The world needs good things.
Also, I really need to get my hands on Esther’s audiobook. I can only find it on Audible, and I don’t like Audible. Does anyone know a place that sells it on audio CD or a simple MP3 download without all the DRM crunk? I’m happy to pay, I just don’t want to have to install Audibles junkware again.
30/12 2017
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Tuning out for today. While my cholesterol gently weeps. Early to bed for a good long trip to the dreamscape. When I get up it will be time to count down the last hours of the year. The new millennium will finally be of legal age. Wait. Don’t math me, bro. My resolution is to finally do all the things I said I’d do the previous years. I swear I’ll finish that Vanilla Ice mixtape any day now.
See you tomorrow. Remember, it’s your last chance to fill out the questionnaire to gain access to the secret darkweb site where I post all the MP3s of me singing the collected works of Michael Jackson, as voiced by Billy Dee Williams. Shhh. The deep state is listening in. Don’t mention the war on christmas. I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it. Hashtag free the salmon. Ella ella ella. I have the absolute right to do whatever I want to with my department of dreams. Always protect the thing you know is true. Happiness is a warm sun. Echoes of worth. Didt you know how mu
30/12 2017
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday, guys. And merry New Year. Have a happy and safe night.
31/12 2017
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My new year’s resolution is to be 100% perfect and never make a mistake and excell in all I do. I mean, if we’re going to be hypothetical I might as well aim for the stars. I’d rather fail in being spectacular than fail in being mediocre.
31/12 2017
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Happy New Year from the goats and moi.
31/12 2017
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I thought I’d make a little update of this meme from last new year’s. It’s not completely accurate since December has actually been pretty good here. But you know. You gotta laugh. Right?
31/12 2017
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Two hours and 13 minutes to go. I really don’t like all the explosions outside. Ever since that New Year’s eve in the hospital I have not been a fan of fireworks. Hope the goats are alright. At least I don’t have to worry as much about them as I used to at the old place. They live in a better neighbourhood than I do now.
31/12 2017
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It’s been quite a year. If I had to look back on it at the end of November I_ would probably just have posted a bunch of swearwords and a censored picture of someone giving a rude gesture. But things have improved in December. So I hope that is a trajectory that will keep going in 2018. That sure would be nice. And since everything always works out great in the end I’m sure that’s what’s going to happen. Phew, lucky us!
I know it’s been a shirty 2017 for many, and many haven’t had the good December to cap the year off. And many many have it much much worse than I. I try to be mindful of the many things I have to be greatful for.
You guys come to mind. I’m just some guy on the internet. I really appreciate how supportive you’ve all been. How loved I feel. The thoughts for my family, and the goats. When I’m hanging on by a thread it means a lot knowing there are so many people reaching out to me. Thank you all for that. It’s one of the things that keep me going when times are tough. And when times are good it’s always great knowing I can make people happy with some silly goat stuff or whatever. You’re all in the ring with me, my faceboxers.
Tough first 11 months.
Bad mental health. Still trying to find a balance with the meds. I have been deep down in the dark. I don’t know how much of it has shown through on Facebook. I know some of it has. But I also know I internalize a lot. So if you think it’s seemed bad, it’s probably been ten times worse. At least.
A political shirtstorm. I know I shouldn’t let it get to me so much, especially since most of it doesn’t directly affect me. But as I’ve gone over before, it’s more about what it says about the world and where we’re heading and who we are as people. I’m not going to rant on about that now. And I’ll try to not let it fill so much in my space next year. But that’s why the Alabama election was part of my better December. Just some little sign that not everything is rotten all the time. I hope Democrats and Republicans can find better ways and better people. Don’t make me stage a coup with my army of goats.
The #MeToo stuff. Man, that really sucks. Obviously. It was an eyeopener to see how many of my friends had their own stories to tell, or not tell. It’s really crazy what has gone on. We’ve had our share in Denmark too. Hopefully this is something that is changing trajectory too. Hopefully men won’t be getting away with as much. There’s always going to be bad stuff. But boy, I didn’t realise that everything was bad. Hopefully we won’t be allowed to close our eyes to it anymore.
The worst part of the year for me, of course, was losing Yogi / A38. After Kamel and Palle this was the third year in a row to lose a top goat that everyone loved. That I loved. I only got a little over a year with her, but she was something special. No wonder everyone loved her. Everyone’s favourite in no time. Just thinking about her now I had to laugh a little. All the funny, quirky things about her. I wish I had gotten more time with her. There is never enough time.
I really hope 2018 will be without goat tragedy. Just a happy and stable year without loss. The two newbies, Milo and Sky, are already doing a lot to make me happy. They are the sosftest little fuzzywumps ever. Attached at the hip and chubby chipmunks. I hope it will be a good year watching them grow. While Mia and Mio give me the stink eye. Haha. I’m sure the old girls still know they are my special ladies. We’ve been through a lot, and hopefully there’s much more to come. Still the best part of my life.
Hopefully they will all stay healthy. And the human family too. It looked grim for a while. But the news of my dad’s tumor being benign turned things around some. My mother is recovering as planned from the hip replacement. My brother has been out of the hospital and infection free since the last bout. Hopefully the transplant can happen in the new year. Life keeps trying to knock us out, but somehow we stay on our feet. Having all of you behind us helps with that. If I don’t go blind next year I’ll consider that a win. Stable, quiet uncomplicated. That’s what I want. And a warm spring and summer. Long dreams. I don’t need to win the lottery or travel the world or marry Jessica Alba or lose all the holiday weight or to go viral on the webs. I just want things to be okay. Because when they’re okay they’re good. And when the people I care about are okay, it’s good.
There’s lots of good in the world. Thank you for reminding me, thank you for being part of it.
And now, if you’ve read all this… you must be really bored. I would like to issue a formal apology. Please get in line to receive a handshake and a free signed photo of Ted Danson. Signed by me, I mean.
Ten minutes to go of 2017 here. I can’t believe we made it to the future. In 1997 this did not seem likely, if even possible.
Yet here we are. Happy New Year, and may 2018 be better for you than 2017. Make the most of it. PS send more pizza.
31/12 2017
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End of Facebook. Go go goat photos.
That’s all for this year, see you in the next one.