Explosions In The Kitchen
Today will be a good day. I hope this year will be a good year for all. Here’s Mia and Bruce from 2014.
1/1 2018
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Good goat times today. First of the year. I’m not gonna lie, January 1st isn’t a day I really feel like heading out into the cold. But you know. I had to check on the goaties. Even though they live in a better neighbourhood now, I wouldn’t be able to not worry about them if I hadn’t gone to see them.
They were fine, of course. They have probably had a bit of a scary night with all the noise from the fireworks. But everyone was happy for some treats. Sky loves the raisins already. We’ve seen how she goes for the pocket. Milo is starting to go for them too, though not so eagerly and he’s not so good at chewing them yet. Baby steps. Seems like Sky is a little more advanced. But they are both so gosh darned sweet and fluffy.
Btw I did get pooped on today while sitting with them in my lap. I can’t be mad at them. Good thing goat berries just slide off. It’s worse with the newborns because their poop is not quite berried. TMI? I wouldn’t give up sitting with them in my lap. However I’m glad they missed my pocket at least.
I brought watermelon to celebrate the new year. But it wasn’t much of a hit. I need to find something else for special occasions I think. I don’t think the little ones even got a taste. Mio grabbed some and later on I saw Mia eating from them after I’d put them in their stall. So it wasn’t a total waste.
We stayed inside as the weather wasn’t great. A cold rain. I didn’t mind so much, since it meant less chance of meeting gangs of hooligans with fireworks on my way there. January 1st at 9am is a good time to get mugged. Walking along the usually busy highway. Only a few cars passing every now and then. Things pretty desserted. There was a strange light, though. It was completely overcast and raining, but it wasn’t really dark. Maybe all the fireworks were still burning above the clouds. It felt like an unnatural light. Like I was on a stage and it was lit even though the background was a painted storm. Well, anyway. I didn’t get mugged, only by hungry goats. There is no defense against those.
1/1 2018
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“It’s New Year’s Morning, no way we’re getting up yet!”
Could have guess they’d sleep like that. Always like glued together.
1/1 2018
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Now comes the hard part.
Getting through the last of the Christmas candy.
1/1 2018
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“Grandma regrets to inform you that she will also not be getting up just yet.
Thank you for getting up early on January 1st and walking an hour through the rain, though”.
1/1 2018
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So tired. Stayed up most of last night. And then long walks in the rain for goating. I’m going to go for a long journey into the dreamscape. I’ll set my alarm for 2019, don’t wait up.
1/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi day.
2/1 2018
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goatlog
2/1 2018
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I love these babies so much I had to clone myself so I could hold them both at the same time.
Also, time to diet again. After this pizza.
2/8 2017
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Now’s the time that Santa starts touring the world, living in AirBnBs in all the countries he had to rush through on Christmas.
2/1 2018
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Looks like they posted our video again. Three million views in 4 hours. Not bad. I never did give a final response to the people that contacted me about licensing this video. I guess I just don’t want the goats to become a business. It could have made the page grow and get us more likes and all that. But eh. At the end of the day I didn’t sign the agreement.
(I did let this page post this video)
link: Mia on my back video
2/1 2018
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goatlog, from the christmas shoot
2/1 2017
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I hope your 2018 will be be good. And goat.
2/1 2018
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at the dark end of the night, that’s where we sleep
3(11 2017
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In the future everyone gets a nuclear button for 5 minutes.
3/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy hump day guys. First Kamel day of the year. She’s been gone quite a while now. It makes me happy that there are still people out there who are happy to see her and remember her fondly.
3/1 2018
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Posting this for no particular reason. Not to push anyone’s Buttons or anything
“The four-minute warning was a public alert system conceived by the British Government during the Cold War and operated between 1953 and 1992. The name derived from the approximate length of time from the point at which a Soviet nuclear missile attack against the United Kingdom could be confirmed and the impact of those missiles on their targets”
3/1 2018
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My idea of cryptocurrency is taking a money bill and drawing scribbles over the number. I encrypted it.
*tap tap* Hello? Is this thing on?
No, YOU’RE a failed comedian.
3/1 2018
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Fancy running into you here.
3/1 2018
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I just almost fell asleep on the toilet. So tired. I was sort of half asleep and then snapped out of it. And for a minute I wasn’t sure what world I was in. This world or the next. Here or in dreams. And I guess I had a little panic attack coming on. Usually my panic-like symptoms are related to social events. Dealing with people. Humans. It’s rare that I get something like this just out of the blue. Sometimes it has happened when I exercise. I guess because I’m not breathing right then my heart goes into overdrive and for 20 seconds I feel like I’m going to die, until I manage to get my breathing right and air into the lungs. It’s an odd feeling because in a strange way there’s something… I don’t know, not pleasurable. But interesting, about it. It’s like you’re standing on the threshold of something. And maybe there’s nothing on the other side. But it’s still intriguing. There’s still a part of you that wants to see if there is something on the other side. Something or nothing. Roll the dice.
And then coming out of almost sleep and half dream you wonder which world you’re in. Are you having a lucid dream. Or did you just fall asleep on the toilet. When I walked out of the bathroom for a second I didn’t know what to expect. I couldn’t remember what was on the other side of the door. It was like seeing my apartment again for the first time. Like I had to reboot my brain. Reload the program. And then the world went into focus (well, not literally. Because of my eyesight. But the feeling of the world). And then it was normal and I was breathing. It’s an odd odd feeling. And there’s something fascinating about it, even if it’s wildly unpleasant. Like you’re on the threshold and all it would take is just a little push and you’d fall into… whatever it is on the other side. A maelstrom, a whirlpool. The slipstream behind Odin’s chariot. What do I know. It’s like getting a little glimpse of what lies beyond the veils. Or maybe it’s just my brain being deprived of oxygen because I don’t breathe right. Who knows. But on the rare occasion when the feeling comes on in a situation that isn’t involving something social, there’s a part of me that wants to push on. That wants to dive into the whirlpool. That wants to open my eyes but close them at the same time. It’s a fascinating feeling. You feel like you’re dying but also that you might be waking up. What is reality? Is this real. Did I almost wake up or did I almost pass out? Who knows.
Oh my time is up? Okay, see you next week, doc.
3/1 2018
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goatlog, my first day with the newbies
3/1 2018
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I’m trying not to pay too much attention to the politics, because life’s too short. Or long. But I feel I have to enter into the record that so far the Trump has bragged about the size of his rock hard nuclear button and Steve Bannon has said that the Trumps committed treason.
It’s been a long year. eh? Lemon, we’re only halfway through January 3rd.
3/1 2018
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Okay, I better head to bed. Before I pass out and fall into the toilet and get flushed out and have to live my life among the alligators in Aarhus sewers. Off to the dreamscape instead. Dive into the whirlpool and wrap myself in the veil. I don’t know which world is the real one, but I know over on that side I can see perfeclty and there’s a better than 10% chance that I can fly. So I’m going to go to there. Please remember to get your hand stamped if you’re going to join me, otherwise they won’t let you back in. And there’s a five drink minimum and there’s no sax in the champagne room. If you want sax you should go to the saxophone room. There’s also a combined sax and champagne room, but you don’t wanna know what goes on in there.
3/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Bob from 2012. He was black like Palle, but fuzzy and tubby unlike Palle who was shiny and sleek.
4/1 2018
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Good goat times today. Dark and overcast, but at least I missed most of the rain. The little ones are getting more sure of themselves and their surroundings. And they are both loving the raisins now. Begging for more. Still bleating loudly for each other if they get separated.
Took them all out on the grass, where they were admired by the kindergarteners next door. I took the little ones all the way over to the fence so the (human) kids could pet them a little. Very popular.
Mia and Mio had some cracking headbutting duels. Very hard knocks. And then Mia mounted Mio! Ohmygosh. That’s not something you see every day! I wonder if these are the first signs of Mia trying to take over control of the herd. Or if it’s just heat or something. Pretty entertaining, for the human at least.
Back in the pen we have some old christmas trees now. Very nice. Everyone enjoyed munching on them, including the kids. Tis the season. And the kids are so durn sweet.
On the down side, I managed to fall on my way home. Yes, the mud managed what the ice and snow had failed. I’ll probably be sore tomorrow, but at least I don’t think I’ve broken any ribs this time. And I got mud all over me anyway from being in the goat pen. So it goes.
4/1 2018
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The audience was rapt
4/1 2018
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Let’s get jolly
4/1 2018
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These two. These two kids. I can’t even with the floof. So very floof.
4/1 2018
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Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. Not only was it hilarious to see Mia trying to mount Mio. (Mount Mio, file that under possible nicknames) but it also happened in front of all the kindergarteners haha.
4/1 2018
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The tired is creeping in. And my right arm is starting to hurt a little. I broke the fall with it when the mudslide happened. It’s an odd moment in time, when you know you’re falling and you know you can’t stop it and it feels like you have all the time in the world, yet there is no time at all. And then you’re in the mud. At least it didn’t happen in front of the kindergarteners.
I am off to the dreamscape. I am sure they have my bionic arm standing by. And the pizza tree, if the science and development department have been diligent. And it turns out, the meme was in our heart the whole time. The end.
…?
4/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Medium and Large from 2013.
5/1 2018
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Feeling the fall. The right side of my body is pretty sore. My arm and shoulder especially. I mean, really it’s not too bad. I’ll be fine. But I have to try to milk this for sympathy. Do you think the pizza guy will give me free extra cheese if I make it out like I’m in horrible pain?
Thanks for the concern, all. Nothing serious. I’ll grab a painkiller and take it easy for a couple of days.
Guess I picked the wrong day to have an arm wrestling contest with Cooper’s evil doppelganger (joke for the Twin Peaks fans).
5/1 2018
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Here is my latest art project “A Twin Peaks Christmas Dinner In The Danish Lodge”
Spoiler alert: Nothing happens, there’s no reason to watch it.
link: Christmas dinner backwards
5/1 2018
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I demand that the FBI investigate the corrupt Gorila Foundation and their alleged “banana to play” tactics, also in ur anium.
5/1 2018
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Pop quiz, do you think the grass is wet?
5/1 2018
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This is my latest art project entitled “Please stop posting these things or I’ll report you to Facebook”.
link: Poul Reicardt reversed video
5/1 2018
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Turns out, the night was in our hearts all along
6/1 2018
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I made my clone come around to pose for another photo with the newbies. He was pretty annoyed. I mean, taxi fare from Bordeaux to Aarhus isn’t cheap. But he kinda owes me. A rib and a couple rude bits, to be specific.
6/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Herman from 2014.
6/1 2018
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I’m just worried that if I have “Let’s Get It On” playing loudly in the background, the pizza guy will think I have ulterior motives. It’s not about him. It’s about the pizza.
Signed, Worried In Aarhus.
6/1 2018
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Rosemary ain’t got thyme for that
6/1 2018
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Mia! That is inappropriate on so many levels. Sheesh. We’re going to get an R rating on our channel.
6/1 2018
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People who don’t believe in climate change complaining about the crazy weather. That’s like… I don’t know. A madman claiming to be a stable genius or something. If we evolved from gorillas then how come there are still gorillas on TV? Anyway, I hereby submit my candidature for the fake news awards. We all know it’s rigged, though. All those fake immigrants and fake dead people voting.
This world is %&%¤YGfb nuts. I can’t even take it seriously anymore. I can barely get angry, it’s so dumb. How quickly you can tear down something that took forever to build. Destruction is so much faster and more satisfying to the doped masses.
6/1 2018
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It’s a crazy old world. So I’m going to head to where things make sense. The dreamscape. The painkillers didn’t help and I feel like I got run over by a Mio train. Or will it be a Mia train now? We’ll see.
If you have any questions while I’m gone, please direct to my clone who is standing by on the International Henriksen Hotline. You can also ask for Lance if you feel like something gruffer.
6/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday, guys.
7/1 2018
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goatlog
7/1 2018
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I’m not even in this picture. My clone made a clone of himself and they’ve taken over the goat yard, send help.
7/1 2018
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A very merry thank you to Beverly Fish and my blogfriend Debbie for the cards! Thank you for thinking of me! I am lucky to have such people in my life, along with goats and pizza.
7/1 2018
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Fluffybutt at the fence
7/1 2018
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Oh my gosh! Thank you so much Carine Jamar! These are absolutely gorgeous. The picture doesn’t half do them justice. They are so beautiful! I was not expecting this! I don’t know what I did to deserve having such nice friends, but I’m glad I do. I really need a gallery. One wing to display my photos and one wing to display the amazing art you faceboxers have sent to me.
7/1 2018
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Well I just managed to blow up a plate. Had a plate sitting on my hotplate and turned the wrong on by mistake. Left the plate on the hotplate. Blew apart in my hand. Guess I’m lucky I didn’t get burnt or cut. Uncle Clouseau in the kitchen.
7/1 2018
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New kids on the rocks
7/1 2018
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Grandma’s always a popular lady with the kids.
7/1 2018
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End of Facebook. Go go goat photos.
That’s all for this week.