Today will be a good day. Here’s Mathilde from 2005. Winning her trust while she was still scared of humans.

8/1 2018
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Good goat times today. Freezing cold. Frost on the grass. But a nice walk as the sun was rising. And a lovely, sunny day. Just very cold.
The little ones are getting more sure of themselves. In the beginning when I let them out they’d come out slowly and look around carefully. Now it’s like seeing Kamel being let out the gate. They go straight around the corner to the food storage and start hoovering the floor for whatever may have been dropped there. Their cute little fuzzbutts gone in a flash.
I took the little ones out in the pen and gave them some hay. And then I took the big girls out for a little walk. Just me and them, like the good old days before the little intruders came and spoiled it all! I figured Mia and Mio deserved some time alone with me. Treats and cuddles were had and then we joined the newbies in the pen.
I do am still wondering if Mia is trying to overtake leadership of the cult. Mio seems less dominant. At breakfast she stayed in the back of the stall, eating from her bucket. No chasing Mia. Even when I gave them some spaghetti she only did one little growl. Normally she’s grunting and woofing and chasing Mia away. But Mia is standing her ground mostly now it seems. Maybe it’s the arrival of the babies that has shaken up the hierarchy a little. Or maybe it’s just that Mia and Mio are both getting older. It’s easy to forget that before Palle passed away he actually dethroned Mio for a while. Maybe Mia’s time is coming now. I will miss Mio being all bossypants if that’s the case. She’s so funny with her growls and grunts and huffing and puffing. We’ll see. There was no mounting today.
Also I didn’t trip and nothing exploded. Not bad.
8/1 2018
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Walking with the sunrise

8/1 2018
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The fuzzybutts are on the prowl.

8/1 2018
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Out of this world
8/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy Yogi day.

9/1 2018
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Fambly

9/1 2018
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Thank you for calling the Cthulhu hotline. All our operators are currently busy wreaking havoc on Earth. If you leave a message after the horrible shriek of pain then we will get back to you as soon as possible.
9/1 2018
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I’d just like to take this opportunity to once again briefly (fat chance) thank you all for your friendshipboats. Whether you’ve sent me amazing gifts or wonderful carts or comments or messages or likes or any of the sorts, or just been around. I appreciate it and feel very blessed. I don’t know how I got so lucky. I blame the goats for a lot of it. When you write the story of my life the goats will be a huge part of it because through them I have met such amazing people. I am also greatful for the oldtime friends who knew me before the goats. I can’t imagine any of you from back then would have guessed I’d end up like this, the goatman. But then I’ve seen some of you grow from young friends to parents of beautiful children. And while I’m not saying the idea of you as parents was an impossibility to imagine, it’s still not something you think about when you’re hanging out talking about The Smashing Pumpkins and how annoying it is that the NSPAA only opens after midnight etc. Wherever life takes you, it will probably be somewhere you didn’t think you’d end up.
But yes, thank you all. There was a time in my life when I felt very alone. Now I always know that there is friends and family that care about me, and that frankly is the difference between life and death. All or nothing. I’m always worried that because of my flaws in humaning people don’t realise how much I appreciate what they do for me. I’m not great at communicating. But I hope you still know. And I’m glad if my goat pals can give you a smile once in a while, because I love sharing them. They are my bubble where I can hide away from the world when it gets too hard to bear. But you guys are the reason that the real world is still worth keeping in touch with.
Unless you are all figments of my imagination, which I haven’t totally ruled out yet. Quick somebody pinch me. (BACK AWAY FROM THE LASSE, SEAN).
So in conclusion I’d like to thank the academy, and you. Mostly you. Really, the academy has done nothing for me. Where’s my award?!
That was briefly it. See you in the funny goat pages.
9/1 2018
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We also like treats

10/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy hump day, guys.

10/1 2018
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Peculiar. I was sitting on the steps with the newbies. The camera on a tripod to do some filming. Then Mia came running over. I figured either she’d go in the house to nibble at the christmas tree. Or come chase the little ones away to be with me. But then instead she went by us and over to the side of the house like this. I put the babies down and went over to the tripod to take a picture. I have no idea why she went to stand there. Maybe she was hiding from grandma. You know there’s gotta be payback sometime, Mia.

10/1 2018
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There is a river, and I always embrace it. As it embraces me.
10/1 2018
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Oprah/Letterman 2020
And a seat on the Supreme Court for Judge Judy.
We now live in a timeline where I’m not sure if I’m joking or not.
10/1 2018
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That’s all for today. My eyes can’t take anymore looking at the screen. Time to flow down the river into the dreams. There is a forest where I walk alone but you are always with me. There is a garden where the flowers never grow but are always in bloom. Follow the yellow brick road, but stay out of the yellow snow. The yeti haven’t invented plumbing yet. How abominable, said the nun to the seaman.
I think I ate some bad carpe.
10/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s the sweet goof Popcorn from 2015.

11/1 2018
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Good goat times today. I headed out real early. Twas a dark and foggy morning. It was actually a little eerie. Plus I was listening to a Stephen King audiobook. Haha. At least I wasn’t listening to The Mist. It really was like walking in The Mist.
I figured that I was out so early that I’d get to let the goats out, but no. They were already outside when I got there. I mean, the earlier they get to go out the better. But I like when I get to give them breakfast and take them out. Mia was standing guard outside the new goat house. She bleated when I came around the corner, but she didn’t come running over to me. It might have been all the mud in the way. Or maybe she couldn’t identify me in the fog. She did bleat after me a little later when I went to get some hay, so I think she still likes me.
Although I better be careful. I was sitting with the little ones, giving them raisins. And I turned around and there was Mia and Mio side by side staring at me with an expression that said “You son of a bitcoin. We shall never forgive you for this”. Luckily they immediately forgave me when I handed out peanuts to them.
Yeah, the newbies have got a taste for raisins now. And they’re little piggies begging for more! They’re starting to recognise the signs too. They know something exciting is happening when I reach for my pocket or they hear the plastic bag rustle. I think Milo is the biggest glutton. He was a little more shy when they first came here, but now he gets very eager when he gets a raisin and he practically tries to bite my fingers off looking for more. Yeah, they’re both growing. They seem to be feeling a little more secure. They still spend all the time next to each other, but now I can pick one up without them both bleating like crazy for each other. At one point one of them was in the shelter and the other was in the goat house and they weren’t complaining. I guess that means they’re starting to feel safe and secure here. No longer panicking when they’re on their own. But I hope they never lose that bond. So cute to see them go everywhere together. Fuzzybutts.
When it was time for me to leave they both came running to the fence too! That made me happy. Mia and Mio were there to get a goodbye treat, but I wasn’t expecting the little ones to come running to say goodbye too. Sweetness.
11/1 2018
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Here is Mia in the fog.

11/1 2018
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Black Beauty was inquiring if I had some cucumber and could she have it?

11/1 2018
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I feel a great disturbance in the force. As if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened.
Oh sorry, it was just gas. Pardon me.
11/1 2018
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Tuning out for today. Heading into the fog of dreams. Embracing the river. Stringing a hammock between the moon and a star. You guys can admire Milo and Sky while I’m gone.
That was an order. ADMIRE THEM!

11/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Choko getting some love in 2008.

12/1 2018
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Premium bonus content, behind-the-scenes extravaganza. That story about Mia coming over and standing next to the goat house? It’s almost like you can see it happening!
link: Mia video
12/1 2018
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A family news update. Not the greatest. While my dad’s tumor was benign it has still messed enough with his kidney that he will not be allowed to donate it to my brother after all. My mom and I are not possible donors either. So that means he’ll have to wait for an outside donor to become available. As my dad says it could be in 5 weeks or 5 years. That’s really too bad. Originally we had hoped the transplant would have happened last year already. But so it goes. We’ll carry on. Hoping for the best in the end.
12/1 2018
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Where’s Fuzzybutts?

12/1 2018
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Since I’m done making divisive political posts, I’m definitely not going to comment on the opening of last night’s The Good Place.
link: The Good Place video
12/1 2018
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Don’t worry, I won’t go overboard on the fog photos again. Just this one.

12/1 2018
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The newbies may be fuzzybutts but I am muddybutt. I need to get my coat washed I think.
No, I am NOT showing you video of my butt. That’s where I draw the line, while I’m sober at least.
12/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Here’s Mads being a good showgoat in 2007.

13/1 2018
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Don’t throw paper towels if you live in a shithole
13/1 2018
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alone within myself again

13/1 2018
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Får får får`NEJ, får får ik får for fanden. Forfra. Hvor kom vi fra. Hvor skal vi hen, du? Sku du spør fra noen? Malkekoen muher og springer over regnbuer og månelander på en landmine med en grimasse der kan passe, pas dig selv go to helledusseda gid jeg var i andeby og blev der.
Your move, google translate.
13/1 2018
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Frost. We’re heading into the coldest months. I assume we’ll get snow sooner or later. You guys tell me about it when I come back from hibenation.

13/1 2018
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T-shirt idea: Map of Europe with the text “I’m with Shithole” on Denmark and an arrow pointing to Norway. Which is next to us. I think. Geography, am I right?
By the way, I don’t think Americans should be allowed to be offended at language anymore when you have a president that uses that kind of language. Allegedly. Also cheats on his wives (plural intended). Allegedly. Hashtag lamestream snowflake fake news. Because we all know that even though it’s just one thing after another after another and on and on and on, it’s all fake. Everything negative is fake news and Trump is a stable genius. Allegedly.
Can you just admit he’s a piece of shit already? It’s okay you gotta vote for him because abortion and guns. But just admit he’s a sack of shit in a shirt and that Jesus would be appalled if he came back right now. There’s nothing fucking godly about the cyclonefartmouth-in-chief. Shit shit shit.
This message brought to you by the Don’t-Give-A-Fuck-Duck and the One In The Shithole One In The Pussy Grabmaster 3000. Sorry not sorry. Sigh. You better be busy jerrymandering the ovaltine. My references are timely and up to date. Hay o.
13/1 2018
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Idea for a TV show: Lin-Manuel Miranda has to cook a meal for Gordon Ramsey and Gordon Ramsey has to write a musical for Lin-Manuel Miranda. PATENT PENDING
13/1 2018
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Goat conductor.
PS Where’s Fuzzybutt?

13/1 2018
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Hey, guys could you help with looking at two photos and telling me which version looks best to you?
No right or wrong answer, if you can’t pick one that’s an answer too.
Pictures in comments. A or B.
13/1 2018
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Feetsies and teefsies.

13/1 2018
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That’s all for today. I am tired, in more ways than one. I shouldn’t have let reality creep into my head. It’s like the bad guy in a horror movie. You think it’s dead, but then suddenly it’s back with an axe and a can of gasoline. THE CALL IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE SHITHOLE.
I’ll try and cool it with the swearing and politics. For my own sake. Now I’ll let my blanket cover me. Embrace the river and let it take me. Take me to the place where reality has no hold and where there are no doors because there is no need for walls. Walk among the stars or along the riverbed. The only limits are the ones you put upon yourself. Break the chain, leave the game. Just breathe the water or the blank space. You are the stars, you are the fish in the river. You see what you want to see.
Too much? Not enough? I guess it depends on what scale you’re measuring by.
13/1 2018
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Today will be a good day. Happy Funday, guys.

14/1 2018
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One thing I miss about the old playground is the slopes. Sitting on a hillside in the sunshine with goats. And then watching them all run down the hill when taking them in. That was always fun.
14/1 2018
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I got the whole world in my hands

14/1 2018
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goatlog

14/8 2018
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I think my clones are planning to kidnap the kids.

14/1 2018
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As a thank you for subscribing to my premium channel please enjoy this never before seen exclusive behind the scenes bonus footage of Mia and Mio watching me set them up the camera. Premium content!
link: Mia and Mio video
14/1 2018
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“There’s beauty in the breakdown”. I love that line.

14/1 2018
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If any of you got a warning text about an incomming gas emission, don’t worry. I managed to hold it in.
14/1 2018
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Be oh so quiet

14/1 2018
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End of Facebook. Go go goat photos.

That’s all for this week.

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