I am starting to feel a little better I think. Meaning that I don’t break down over every little thing. Still sad, but that’s how it’s supposed to be. The day I wouldn’t get sad over the death of a beautiful little goat kid that I have held in my own two arms, is the day I wouldn’t like myself very much. Well, very much more.

Now that I think about it I’m really glad that I was so wrecked on Sunday, after the Tina concert. Imagine if there had been no Tina concert and I had rushed up to the playground all fresh and happy, anxious to see the little kid again. I would have been the one who had found Rainbow then. I don’t know if I would have survived that… poor Jannie. She was there on Saturday when I was feeding the animals, she wanted to check on the little one too. I can’t even think about finding her dead like that. I would break down again.

The real world came knocking today. I got a letter from the social services. My application for retirement has been approved. So that’s good. Starting March 1st I will officially be retired. That should mean I’ll get a little extra money every month. And it means I won’t be dragged out into any jobs or projects that I don’t want. I can settle down and just worry about feeling okay. Work a little at the playground, find some volunteer thing, get a kitty, feel alrite. That’s the plan.

Tomorrow I’m going to dinner at my parents’ house. Will be nice to get out. Let life go on.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 13th, 2008 at 21:14 and is filed under Blogging. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.